


Pink Hair and Java Chip Frappes [Temporarily Discontinued]

by BTS_AlissMarie



Category: NCT (Band), ONEWE (Band), Stray Kids (Band), The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, As does Astro’s Yoon Sanha, Chanhee is an annoying customer, Coffe Shop Owner Lee Sangyeon, Fainting, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Golden Child’s Choi Bomin makes several appearances, Heo Hyunjoon makes an appearance but is not part of the major plotline, Jacob and Younghoon and Juyeon and Sunwoo are baristas, Juyeon and Younghoon established relationship, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Multi, Past Character Death, Past Relationships, Past Suicide, Sickfic, Sunwoo and Chanhee bicker a lot, Sunwoo just needs a break, Sunwoo makes things right with his past relationship, Too many tags I’m sorry I’ll stop now, Warning: trigger!, at first, coffee shop AU, ‘00 line baby (NCT Dream Sunwoo Eric Bomin and Felix)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:28:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 57,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25430920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BTS_AlissMarie/pseuds/BTS_AlissMarie
Summary: Kim Sunwoo could tell anyone who asked him that working at a coffee shop is nothing like those sappy stories you hear - cute barista meets a dashing young customer, they fall in love, get together, live a long happy life.All Sunwoo ever gets is yelled at - and occasionally, a coffee or two thrown on him that had absolutely nothing to do with him in the first place.It’s tiring, and he’s about ready to quit.Cue Pink Hair, Sunwoo’s soon-to-be least favorite customer - and possibly the man of his dreams.
Relationships: Bae Joonyoung | Jacob/Moon Hyungseo | Kevin, Choi Chanhee | New/Kim Sunwoo, Heo Hyunjoon | Hwall/Choi Bomin, Ji Changmin | Q/Ju Haknyeon, Kang Hyungu | Kanghyun/Lee Giwook | Cya, Kim Sunwoo/Lee Giwook | Cya, Kim Younghoon/Lee Juyeon (The Boyz), Lee Felix/Son Youngjae | Eric, Lee Jaehyun | Hyunjae/Lee Sangyeon
Comments: 29
Kudos: 137





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first The Boyz fic, but I’m really enjoying writing it, and I hope you all enjoy reading it! They’re honestly a hilarious bunch of comedians that are sprinkled with giant handfuls of talent and good looks. Kim Sunwoo is my bias, but once this story is finished, I’m open to new ships or requests. 
> 
> Trigger Warning!!! 
> 
> If you are sensitive to suicide or past relationships gone wrong, this is not the story for you. One of the characters had a boyfriend commit suicide, and the other had a boyfriend dump him for someone else. If either of those bother you, for your own safety, I suggest you not read this.
> 
> However, if you like the plot line and want to keep reading, then I will write a warning at the beginning of the chapter that talks about the last suicide so you can skip it and keep reading. 
> 
> Comments, kudos, and requests for certain ships in the story are encouraged and appreciated! Please enjoy!

Sunwoo had always imagined that working in a coffee shop would be just like those stories he read - sweet, fun, easy, interactive. Cute baristas and exchanging numbers, sometimes even landing a hot date.

But having worked at a coffee shop for a year now, Sunwoo could whole-heartedly say it was nothing like those stories.

There were more angry or indifferent customers than there were nice ones. Some of them would create conflict just because they could. 

Sunwoo’s back and legs always hurt after work. He cut his fingers a lot, and bruised his elbows from running into the counters.

He spilled drinks and syrup and chocolate chips all over the floor and his apron, flour got stuck on his cheeks or in his hair those few times he was pulled to the back to help stock up on the pastries.

The lobby never seemed to be free of dirt or crumbs, and Sunwoo swore that sometimes, the teenagers were just as messy as two-year-olds. He never got a break because of their stupid lack of cleanliness and hygiene. 

And the only thing Sunwoo got out of it was what? Free coffee and $7.25 an hour?

Not worth it in his opinion.

Seriously.

How could anyone put this job on a pedestal and lie about the “quiet” atmosphere it brought? 

And sure, maybe half of it was his fault for having an attitude like this, because his other coworkers enjoyed the job and said they thought it was described accurately in stories. 

But who could blame him, really, when he was just naturally inclined toward pessimism?

On this particular day, he’d only been at work for three hours and he’d already had two major spills, three dropped coffees, five angry customers, and a warning from his boss telling him to stop swearing at the customers.

Little did his boss know, there was a big difference between swearing _at_ customers and swearing _in front of_ customers.

Sunwoo would never swear directly in a customer’s face.

Only after they left.

He’d managed to cake roughly a pound of flour on his apron and work shirt, and his hands probably permanently smelled like caramel and vanilla now. That wasn’t a problem, of course, he just got sick of the smell after an eight hour shift. 

“Sunwoo-yah, stop lazing around and help Younghoon with the pastries.”

“Lay off, Sangyeon-hyung,” Sunwoo spat, pushing off from the counter where he’d been checking his phone for messages. He shot his boss a finger heart as recompense for his tone, then joined Younghoon in the baking room to help him with the scones. “The day I rack up enough dough, I’m leaving this wack job and flying to Mars.”

“First of all, Sunwoo-yah, you’re right. You should go to Mars because that’s where you were born, you creepy alien.” Younghoon rolled the chocolate chips and fluffy cream in the batter and set the scone on the sheet to his right. He grabbed a square piece of dough for the next scone, except he threw it at Sunwoo instead of placing it on the flour-covered counter. “Is this enough dough for you to go to Mars?” the handsome man asked, batting his eyelashes innocently. 

The dough landed smack on Sunwoo’s neck. The red-head released an insufferable sigh, and gave his hyung a pointed look. “I hate you.”

“I know. Now help me with these stupid scones.”

Reluctantly, Sunwoo tossed the dough on his neck in the trash and bustled over to the counter where Younghoon worked on rolling the scones. He could see the powdery flour crusted all the way down Younghoon’s wrist and elbows, even caked under his nails and in the cracks of his fingers. 

Great.

Sunwoo was going to look like a freaking snow flurry by the time he finished. 

“Spread some of the flour over here,” he instructed Younghoon, rolling up the sleeves of his uniform. He reached for a square of the dough, but yelped a split second later when a finger brushed a long stripe of flour across his neck.

“You did not!” he screeched, and if the customers were annoyed by the sudden cacophony of threats, screams, and giggles that came from the back, they said nothing.

Sunwoo chased Younghoon around the room, feet slipping and skidding, until he’d effectively pinned the older man against the refrigerator and wiped the expanse of his cheek with flour. 

“Serves you right, you old geezer,” Sunwoo grinned smugly, and patted Younghoon’s cheek for effect. And maybe a little out of spite.

Younghoon squawked. “I am not an old geezer!”

“Sure you are.”

“Am not.”

“Dude, just ask Sangyeon-hyung. He’ll back me up on this.”

“Sangyeon-hyung is older than me, stupid.”

Sunwoo turned around to raise an eyebrow at Younghoon. There was a smirk on his lips. “And your point is?”

“He’s an even older geezer than I am.”

“I’m not talking about physical age, hyung. I’m talking about mental age.”

“Excuse me, I have a much higher mental age than anyone else here.”

“Okay, now you’re just insulting Sangyeon-hyung. That’s disrespectful, Younghoon-hyung.”

Sunwoo felt a shove on his back, and he grunted as his stomach pressed into the metal rim of the table in front of him. He shot Younghoon a warning glare, for which the older man apologized, and the two fell into a comfortable silence as they worked on the scones side by side.

An hour passed, and the two boys had sufficiently stockpiled their goodies for the rest of their shift (hopefully - never knew when they’d get a bus or something). Sangyeon asked them to join Juyeon and Joonyoung at front counter for the remainder of their shifts, reminding them once again that they shouldn’t swear so much in front of customers. Everything became so incredibly boring after that.

They had maybe ten customers over the course of the next two hours, whom Juyeon and Younghoon easily took care of. Which left Sunwoo and Joonyoung to clean up the lobby.

The job Sunwoo despised the most. 

“Cheer up,” Joonyoung - the nicest, most motherly worker in the cafe - murmured. He alone didn’t tease Sunwoo about his attitude because he understood. “You could have it worse off. You could be working in the sewers.”

“OH! The only job good enough for Sunwoo and his potty mouth!”

Sunwoo tossed a rag in the general direction the voice had come from, knew he’d scored when he heard an unearthly squeal (courtesy of Juyeon), and went back to wiping down the tables. 

If there was one thing he appreciated about his job, it was his coworkers. He’d heard so many bad tales of workers not doing their jobs, or taking advantage of their positions. Here, everybody did their part, and usually with a good attitude. 

Like Joonyoung, for instance. Born and raised in Canada, with the English name of Jacob for those few foreign tourists that stopped by, Joonyoung was one of the sweetest people Sunwoo had ever met. He could be silly at times, and lightened the room with his beautiful smile and personality. He was sarcastic and ruthless when he wanted to be, too, although that didn’t happen very often.

But he was most well-known for the way he took care of the other employees. When he saw they were tired or overwhelmed, he would tell them to sit down or take a break. If someone fell sick on a day they were supposed to work, he’d easily take their shift. And he always encouraged them, no matter how bad or good a day they were having.

He was a good man.

“Hey, who wants to go bowling with me after our shift?” Younghoon asked. He was glancing at Juyeon as he spoke, but his invitation was directed to all the employees, including Sangyeon.

“I’ll go,” Juyeon shrugged. He accepted the cash from a customer. “Don’t have much else to do.”

“I’ll ask Haknyeon and Youngjae if they want to come,” Joonyoung said. “If they do, I’ll go.”

“Sunwoo-yah?”

“Can’t,” he muttered, rubbing more vigorously at an invisible spot on the table. “I have an early class tomorrow at university.”

“Do you want us to move it to Friday or Saturday night so you can come?” Joonyoung suggested. 

Sunwoo smiled at him. “I appreciate that, hyung, but I don’t want to keep you from enjoying yourselves. We can do something else together Friday night.”

“For sure,” Joonyoung murmured. He returned the smile, and Sunwoo instantly felt better knowing that his friend would follow through on his promise. Time to book Friday night on his calendar - a night out with the boys. Those were always some of the best nights.

“Sunwoo-yah, can you help Joonyoung make drinks? I see a bus-load of people about to drop in.”

Man.

Why did things have to go so horribly today?

Couldn’t he have just one little break?

Sighing, Sunwoo escaped from the table and begrudingly joined Juyeon and Joonyoung behind the counter, dropping his rag in the dirty water of the “used towels” bucket along the way. Three droplets of water splashed his arm. 

“Do you want to take every other order?” Joonyoung suggested quietly. “That’s how I usually do it with Sangyeon-hyung.”

Sunwoo shrugged. “Whatever. As long as we don’t make the customers wait forever for their drinks.”

“Aw, you do care,” Juyeon teased as he brushed by Sunwoo on his way to the register. He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, sly smirk resting on his lips.

Sunwoo just rolled his eyes in return.

They couldn’t talk much over the next hour or so as they hit their dinner rush. A bus-load of people came in and ordered - some small orders, some upwards of seven drinks. They appeared to be a school returning from a field trip, with a few regular customers interspersed in between.

The four baristas were on their toes the whole time, furiously rushing to get the drinks and pastries out to each customer in under two minutes while at the same time trying not to mess up the orders. They received a couple of complaints, but most of the students were understanding and encouraged them to take their time.

They were the blessings at a job like this.

And hey, Joonyoung and Sunwoo made almost twenty-five thousand won in tips between the two of them, so it wasn’t like their work had been completely in vain.

Sure, Sunwoo was a little bitter that Juyeon and Younghoon made nearly a hundred thousand won each, mainly because they were both handsome and closer to the customers since they took the orders. But he should be grateful some of the students noticed him at all, because more days than not he left with his pocket just as empty as it had been when he’d come. 

So all in all, not a bad day’s work.

Then it happened.

Sunwoo had been handed one of their most complicated drinks - java chip/salted caramel frappe mix - and he messed it up the first time. Feeling that familiar pessimism and hatred flowing through his veins, he took the pitcher and angrily shook the frozen brown icicles into the trashcan. 

He ignored Joonyoung’s gentle words of encouragement in favor of slamming the ingredients for the drink back on his section of the counter. 

His hands flew so quickly he spilled some of the chocolate chips on the floor. 

Another mess to clean up later. 

Then the caramel syrup squirted from the bottle onto his arms in a sticky mess. His apron was discolored in patches from the honey-colored concoction. His fingers were frozen, lined with flour from earlier, and now fumbled so much with the new pack of java chips that the corner tore and another heap of chips rolled from the bag onto the floor.

He was done. He wanted to throw something or walk out of the café and never come back. 

But he couldn’t do that. 

“Dang it!” he hissed loudly, dropping the blender on the counter and wiping an arm across his sweating forehead. He couldn’t do this for much longer before he snapped at the nearest person. 

“You shouldn’t swear in front of customers, you know.”

Speak of the devil.

The new voice floated from over the counter into Sunwoo’s ears, and normally he would ignore the provoking words because (1) he could keep his cool, and (2) it was a customer, not a coworker. But honestly, he was so frustrated and worked up he couldn’t stop himself from whirling around to face the customer. 

“Yeah? Well, there are way worse words I could have used than ‘dang it.’”

“Like what?”

That was surprising. Most of the time, the customers left him alone when he snapped at them. That, or they reprimanded Sangyeon for letting Sunwoo speak that way at a “family-friendly” job. 

He’d never really had a customer indulge in his anger before, though, so he was taken aback for a mere second. Then he remembered why he was so angry. 

He had no shame. 

And since this guy didn’t seem like he’d tattle, Sunwoo took a deep breath, gathered the frustration balled up in his chest, and spat out for all he was worth, “Like sh-“

A hand clapped over his mouth. Any swear word Sunwoo had been about to emit was suddenly trapped in his mouth. 

He almost choked on his own breath when the force of his voice backpedaled into his throat. His vision blanked for a second.

“Seonoo, we’ve talked about this before,” he heard Joonyoung say. “I know you hate this job, but you can’t take it out on the customers.”

Sunwoo grabbed Joonyoung’s hand and wrenched it off his mouth. He glared at the older man, eyebrows drawn together in anger. “Why do you always assume it’s my fault when a customer’s angry?”

“I don’t,” Joonyoung said. He stepped past Sunwoo with a wry smile. “It’s just that I happened to hear this conversation, and I know you were in the wrong. No matter how much someone provokes you, you can’t just give in and mouth off to them.”

Now annoyance was building on top of the frustration and anger - half because Joonyoung was right, and half because Joonyoung was wrong. 

“You know full well I can hold myself together in front of angry customers, hyung,” he stated firmly. He watched as Joonyoung took over making the drink for him; some of the anger faded a little. “Plus, this guy provoked me. He’s just as much at fault as I am.”

Sunwoo pointed at the customer in question as he spoke, spying a flash of pink hair in his peripheral vision. He hadn’t made any attempt to get a good look at the guy, as he didn’t find it necessary. Provoking customers were the worst. 

“It doesn’t matter what he did, Sunwoo, it matters what you did. You almost swore in front of a customer, and that’s strictly against our rules.” Joonyoung sprayed a layer of whipped cream over the frappe. “Just watch what you say, okay?”

Joonyoung handed the java chip/salted caramel frappe to Sunwoo with a gentle pat to the younger boy’s shoulder. He wore a soft smile, as if to say he knew why Sunwoo had done it and wouldn’t blame him.

Ah, who was Sunwoo kidding. He could never stay mad at Joonyoung.

“Fine.” 

He took the drink from Joonyoung’s hands, sucked in a breath to settle his nerves, and placed the drink on the counter in front of the customer. He didn’t smile, but he knew he wouldn’t get reprimanded because he never smiled anyway. It wasn’t really in his nature.

“Are you always like this?” the customer asked before he could turn around and run out of there as fast as his legs would carry him. He’d managed to turn his face away, but he gritted his teeth and sucked it up.

He could handle this guy. 

“Why, is my personality a problem for you?” he asked in a sickly sweet tone. He locked eyes with the customer, and for a second his physique crumbled.

The guy was cute. 

Really cute.

Fluffy pink hair tinged with black at the base, button nose, small pink lips, warm, wide-set eyes. A silver cross earring dangled from his left ear. He was slim, very slim, but managed to look healthy despite the proportion of his height and weight. 

Looking at this customer, one word came to mind: dainty. 

“No, it’s not your personality that’s the problem,” the boy said. Mirth danced in his russet-gold irises. “It’s the job.”

What?

“Wow, thanks. As if I didn’t know I’m not fit for this job,” Sunwoo snapped back. Cute or not, this stranger was really grating on his nerves. “Why don’t you go find me a new one?”

Much to Sunwoo’s chagrin, Pink Hair merely laughed. 

“What’s got you all wound up today, seriously? I get that you don’t like this job, but no way are you always this rude to everybody.”

Sunwoo raised an eyebrow in challenge. “How do you know I’m not always like this? What if I’m actually a serial killer that just happens to hate everybody I walk by?”

Pink Hair shrugged. “For starters, you wouldn’t still have this job.” He flashed a radiant smile that nearly stopped Sunwoo’s heart. “And secondly, you backed down when that other barista scolded you even though he’s not your manager. That tells me you respect him - and someone who respects one good man respects all good men. Including customers.”

Perceptive, and maybe a little creepy that this ball of fluff had eavesdropped on him getting a verbal slap from Joonyoung. But he had a point.

“Not bad,” Sunwoo conceded reluctantly. “So let me tell you why I’m so wound up.” He leaned forward, balancing his weight on his hands so he could crouch over the counter until he was nearly nose-to-nose with Pink Hair. “It’s because stupid customers like you come in here and ask for the most annoyingly complex orders, then get angry when we make one teensy little mistake.”

Again, Pink Hair surprised him, this time by not backing away even when their breaths were blowing in each other’s faces. He thought he even saw a little smirk.

“Well then, my apologies,” Pink Hair said, not sounding at all apologetic. “I’ll make sure to get a plain black coffee next time to soothe your black little heart.”

Sunwoo had no comeback for that, especially when he couldn’t concentrate with that smile a mere inch from his eyes. He settled for snapping out a “You better. Or I’ll have Joonyoung-hyung spike your drink with so much espresso you can’t hear yourself think for a week.”

Pink Hair raised an eyebrow until it disappeared beneath his bangs. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He reached back into his pocket and pulled something out, something that Sunwoo couldn’t see. He held it out. “Here. For you.”

Sunwoo really couldn’t get this guy. He was hard to read, like a book hidden in a secret compartment of a library. Feeling a little anxious at what Pink Hair might be holding, he held his hand palm-up under the stranger’s. A thick paper dropped into his hand.

It was a bill. Twenty-thousand won ($20). 

Way more than most people tipped Sunwoo, especially when he was sarcastic and angry with them.

He stared at the bill, then at Pink Hair, in shock. “What is this for? I didn’t do anything for you.”

Pink Hair took a sip of his drink and shrugged. “You entertained me. Plus, I provoked you and made you feel even worse. It’s the least I can do for being the cause of your frustration.”

With that, Pink Hair pushed off the counter and made his way to the exit. 

Sunwoo’s mouth opened and closed at least ten times as he tried to process exactly what had just happened. He watched in confusion as Pink Hair’s figure exited the café and dwindled into the sunset. 

He really didn’t know what had taken place between the two of them, nor did he know if he wanted to interact with Pink Hair again after the way they’d treated each other.

But he couldn’t lie. 

It  had  been entertaining. 

And, to his surprise, all his anger and frustration were gone.

——

“There’s this new guy who transferred into one of my classes this week. One of Bang Chan-hyung’s friends, from Australia. He’s pretty cool, and has a way deeper voice than you’d expect him to.”

“What’s his name?”

“Felix, I think.”

Another day, another shift, and Sunwoo wanted to scream. 

Joonyoung had so graciously brought along his friend and roommate, Youngjae, to work, because the younger had finished his college work early and wanted to socialize.

Don’t get Sunwoo wrong, he was good friends with Youngjae. They hung out a lot at college as they were in the same year, and even grabbed lunch together four out of five week days.

But at work, Youngjae just kept talking and talking and talking.

It was nice to interact, yes, but not to the point Sunwoo’s ears were drowning in Youngjae’s deceptively calm voice, and his eyes falling out from the number of times he’d rolled them in the last hour. 

He liked peace and quiet at work so he could concentrate and not mess up. Now he was tense and stressed because he had to deal with Youngjae on top of all the responsibilities work brought him.

It was very tiresome.

He was working on whipping up a caramel macchiato when he felt a hand fall softly on his shoulder from behind.

“Are you okay, Sun?” Joonyoung asked quietly. Youngjae’s voice continued rambling in the background, with Juyeon’s and Younghoon’s occasionally interspersed. “You’ve been awfully quiet today.”

Like he was going to tell Joonyoung the truth . _Oh, it’s no big deal, just that your roommate is a big freaking pain in the BUTT._

“I’m just tired,” he settled for. And honestly, it wasn’t a lie. College and a part-time job had him constantly drained. 

Joonyoung pursed his lips. “You should ask Sangyeon-hyung about taking a few days off. Get some rest, catch up on schoolwork, stuff like that. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

“And I would gladly ask him, hyung, except I really can’t afford to skip work,” he sighed, capping the macchiato and setting it on the counter. “Caramel macchiato for Soojin!”

“Sunwoo.” Joonyoung stopped Sunwoo from making another drink by stepping in front of the red-head and pulling the younger close to his chest. “At least take ten minutes to yourself right now, okay? It would make all of us feel better.”

With a start, Sunwoo realized that both Sangyeon and Juyeon were watching him with a hint of concern in their gazes. 

Did Sunwoo really look that bad?

Normally, he hated physical contact of any sort. Everybody he was friends with knew that. They stayed away from him for the most part, except to playfully punch or hit him. 

Occasionally, though, he didn’t mind it. Sometimes he even craved it. And right now, with Joonyoung’s arms wrapped securely around his waist and the warmth of their bodies flooding into his skin, he was so grateful for the contact. 

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been hugged. 

So he allowed himself to melt in Joonyoung’s embrace, his chin finding and resting on his hyung’s shoulder. His arms came up to return the gesture. Most of the tension faded from his body, and he hummed contentedly against Joonyoung’s neck. 

They stayed that way for quite some time, Joonyoung gently rubbing Sunwoo’s head or back, and Sunwoo slowly crashing as the tension fled from him in waves. 

This felt nice. Really nice.

He should let his friends hug him more often. 

The moment broke when Younghoon spotted them and screeched. “Sunwoo’s in a cuddling mood! Get him!”

Suddenly, five bodies were squashed against Sunwoo’s, caging him and practically suffocating him with affection. Hands were petting his hair and tugging his ear and rubbing his back. A little warm and smothering, for sure, but Sunwoo found himself laughing in the middle of their group hug.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed like this (other than those times he laughed at his friends’ expense, of course). 

“HEY!”

The group quickly broke apart when they realized they had a customer. Juyeon scrambled for the register, and Younghoon dragged Youngjae around the counter declaring, “You’re not even supposed to be back here. I should sue you for customer assault.”

Amidst Youngjae’s protesting squawks and the aggressive smacking from Younghoon that followed, Sunwoo chanced a good look at their customer.

The voice had been familiar somehow; someone who was more of an acquaintance than a friend, who he’d interacted with personally but didn’t know well. 

When he spied the pink hair, he immediately knew who it was.

“Yah, what are you doing here?” 

Pink Hair blinked at him surreptitiously. “Why else would I be here? I’m buying a coffee.”

At the words, Sunwoo surged forward and peeked at the order on Juyeon’s screen. Nothing as of yet. 

He slid his narrowed gaze up to Pink Hair. “And what exactly were you planning on ordering?”

“Uh, whatever the heck I want to order. Got a problem with that?” 

“Liar,” Sunwoo spat back. Juyeon stared at him with wide eyes, probably shocked that Sunwoo would treat a customer like this. Well, Juyeon didn’t know the back story, so forget him. “You’re getting a black coffee, remember? You promised.”

The exaggerated look of contemplation that fell over Pink Hair’s gentle features irked Sunwoo. “I guess I did promise, didn’t I?” Pink Hair smiled up at Juyeon. Another pang of annoyance struck Sunwoo’s heart. “I’ll take a black coffee then. Decaf.”

Satisfied, Sunwoo nodded formally at Pink Hair and trotted back over to his spot at the counter. He’d make Pink Hair’s drink, and make sure he spiked it with a little extra shot of caffeine just because he could. And because Pink Hair annoyed him.

“What was that all about?”

Juyeon must have finished taking Pink Hair’s order and come to confront Sunwoo about his terrible customer service. 

Well, Sunwoo didn’t need to answer to him. 

“Screw you,” he snarled, glaring at Juyeon before pushing roughly past his friend to place the coffee cup under the espresso machine.

Juyeon frowned. “Seriously, Sunwoo, what are you doing? He asked for decaffeinated.”

“He also asked for payback after the way he provoked me yesterday,” Sunwoo muttered under his breath. 

Unfortunately, Juyeon heard him. “Are you okay, Sunwoo? Because I’ve never seen you act like this before, which is saying a lot.”

“Why, because I’m always  so  nice to everybody? Come on, hyung, cut me some slack, okay. This guys deserves what’s coming to him. Besides, he won’t complain to anybody.” 

“Oh, yeah? And how would you know that?”

The espresso finished dripping into the cup, and Sunwoo removed the cup off the stand. His fist slammed the paper down on the counter, so forcefully that a few drops jumped the lip and burned his arm. He didn’t even flinch.

“Because I entertain him too much. He’d never tattle for fear of losing his daily movie reel.”

Confusion replaced the concern on Juyeon’s face. “What in the world are you talking about?”

“Just trust me on this, okay? I know what I’m doing.”

Five long seconds of silence in which Juyeon searched Sunwoo’s expression for any hint of deceit or mischief. He found only confidence, so he gave in with a long-suffering sigh and a pinch to the bridge of his nose. “I really shouldn’t let you do this, but if you’re so sure he won’t do anything about it, go for it. But if you do get in trouble, I’m not backing your sorry behind up.”

Sunwoo held his hands up. “Fair enough. Now get out of my way and go flirt with Younghoon-hyung.”

Juyeon, having gotten used to the teasing by now, merely shot Sunwoo a glare that promised death later. “Watch yourself. I don’t want to see you leave this job.”

The sudden soft words had Sunwoo freezing in place. He and his coworkers never really explicitly told each other how much they meant to each other - coworkers before friends, as they told anyone who asked - but those few times they did, they knew. They knew they’d always stick together and look out for each other.

Well, no matter. Sunwoo had a job to do. 

The red-head took the cup of coffee and poured in the pot of decaf until it was full. He pressed one of the black lids on top, wiped it clean when the coffee bubbled, and slid it across the counter into the waiting hands of Pink Hair.

“Enjoy,” he smirked. 

Pink Hair took a single sip. The next second, Sunwoo had jerked back with squinted eyes and scrunched nose as little droplets of coffee sprayed across his face. 

“Gross!” Pink Hair exclaimed, grimacing and looking at the label on the coffee. “Did you put espresso in this?”

Sunwoo shrugged. He couldn’t help the tiny grin of victory that lifted his lips - a grin that he hid behind the towel used to wipe off his face, of course. “I thought you’d like it.”

“Not when I’m expecting decaf, you idiot,” Pink Hair hissed. He glowered at Sunwoo. “You’re so petty. Just because I messed with you yesterday, you have to go and spike my coffee.”

“You make it sound like I did something dangerous,” Sunwoo huffed. “Caffeine is way less harmful than those drugs people use to spike beers.”

Pink Hair blinked, unimpressed. “Have you ever seen how caffeine affects me? It’s almost as bad as drinking a spiked beer.”

“Then why’d you get a frappe yesterday?”

“Frappes have what I like to call muffled caffeine,” Pink Hair stated. “Not as noticeable, so not as much of an affect.” 

The explanation, paired with the expression on Pink Hair’s face, had Sunwoo bursting out in laughter. “Oh my god, are you really that dumb? Caffeine is caffeine, muffled or not. It’ll have the same affect on you either way.”

Pink Hair offered Sunwoo a smug smile. Suddenly, Sunwoo felt like the dumb one. “Of course I know that, silly. I was just trying to make you laugh.”

What?

“You have a nice laugh.”

A wink, a heavenly smile, and a gentle pat on his arm. Sunwoo was so stunned he had no idea what to say or how to react. He could only watch with open mouth as Pink Hair disappeared once again. 

——

“I don’t get it.”

Sunwoo groaned and dropped his head on the table where his homework was spread in a heap. He’d been trying to focus on homework for the last two hours, but his mind kept wandering back to Pink Hair and his strange personality. 

“He comes in, makes fun of me, then randomly compliments me or gives me tips,” Sunwoo explained. “It makes me hate him but like him at the same time, you know?”

“Maybe that’s his goal.” Youngjae, who sat beside him flipping back and forth between two pages of his Chemistry book, had decided to crash at Sunwoo’s dorm for the night. “It’s a good tactic for breaking people down.”

Sunwoo shot up from the table to stare at Youngjae. His friend wasn’t even paying attention to him, just scribbling in the margins of his notebook while he pointed at a highlighted section of his book. Sunwoo never understood how he could multitask so well.

“You think so? But why would he do that to me of all people?”

“I’m sure he has his reasons. I read once that a lot of people who do that say they saw somebody who looked really sad or angry and wanted to help them.”

Weird.

“Well, he did say he wanted me to laugh.”

“See? He’s just trying to make your day better. Don’t think too much about it.”

Sunwoo scoffed. “He must have a backwards way of implementing his plan, then, because he makes me so irritated the moment he opens his mouth.”

Sighing, Youngjae put his pen down and faced Sunwoo. “But he ultimately still makes you feel better by the time he leaves, yes?”

“Well, yeah, but-“

“Then it’s working.” Youngjae shook his head as if to say he was getting tired of this conversation and returned to his homework. “It’s called reverse psychology or something. Provoking a desired response by doing the opposite.”

Sunwoo sat and thought about that for a while, tapping his pen against the upper right corner of his Advanced Lyrics homework. He supposed Eric’s theory about reverse psychology could be a valid answer for Pink Hair’s attitude, but at the same time he felt there could be another, completely different, motive underneath. 

What if Pink Hair really was just bored and found entertainment through Sunwoo? What if he just really liked coffee and found the baristas an interesting add-on? But then again, if that were true, why wouldn’t he just watch them from afar?

“Hyung, just do your homework,” Youngjae whispered into the silence. “I can hear you thinking and it’s bothersome.”

Irked, Sunwoo grabbed his pen and violently began scribbling pointless, illegible notes over the blank page of his own notebook. He’d probably regret not focusing later, but for now he couldn’t find it in him to care.

He had good scores in his classes, anyway, so one or two bad ones wouldn’t affect his grades that much.

An hour flew by in the same manner, Youngjae being productive and Sunwoo pretending to be, when they were interrupted by a knock at the door.

Sunwoo’s roommate must be back. 

“It’s unlocked!” he shouted, and as a result received a punch in the shoulder for being too loud for Youngjae’s liking. Whatever. It was better than actually getting up out of his seat. He liked being lazy when he could. 

The front door opened to extract Changmin inside, followed by a newcomer who seemed familiar to Sunwoo. He bowed formally in greeting. 

“SEONOO!”

So much for Youngjae getting the peace and quiet he wanted for studying. With Changmin here now, there’d be no peace for the rest of the night. 

“I brought a friend,” the older man announced. Those wide, warm eyes of his were even brighter than normal, if that was possible. “This is Gi Wook. He’s a friend of a friend who told me to introduce you three to each other.”

The name had Sunwoo doing a double-take. When he met Gi Wook’s gaze, he knew exactly why the boy had been so familiar to him.

A huge smile broke out over his face. “Cya-hyung? From Harim School of Arts?”

“Oh my god, Sunwoo?” The blue-haired boy surged forward when he realized he was now having a reunion with one of his oldest friends. The two wrapped each other in a tight embrace, accepting a reconnected friendship and the warmth that came with it. “I always wondered what happened to you when we split the band up to go our separate ways. Can’t believe I found you here!” 

“Wait.” Gi Wook and Sunwoo broke apart to see Changmin and Youngjae staring between the two of them in confusion. “You two know each other?”

“Of course!” Gi Wook laughed. Man, it was so good to hear his voice. “We went to high school together! Started a band with two of our other friends. That’s what got us both interested in performing.”

“We were together for several years before college split us up,” Sunwoo explained. If Youngjae or Changmin noticed the way Gi Wook and Sunwoo kept their fingers interlocked, they said nothing. “But I guess Gi Wook-hyung and I were meant to remain friends for a long time to come.”

“Definitely not a coincidence,” Changmin agreed. He stared at the two for another long second. “Well, I have to go meet my History professor. I’ll be back in an hour or two, unless Bomin actually responds to me about dinner. Enjoy yourselves!”

“Bye, Changmin-hyung,” three voices chorused.

With Changmin gone, Sunwoo turned his full attention back to Gi Wook and Youngjae.

“I guess introductions are in order. Gi Wook-hyung, this is Youngjae. Youngjae, this is Gi Wook-hyung.”

“Pleasure to meet you.”

The two boys shook hands, then Sunwoo led them out to his living room and sat them down around the TV - Youngjae on the recliner and Gi Wook on the couch next to him. 

“From what Changmin-hyung said, I’m assuming we were supposed to meet because we’re all rappers with experience,” Sunwoo began. “Gi Wook-hyung and I, as I said before, were part of a four-member band before we went to college. Youngjae and I met through a couple of our freshman classes, one of which was our rhythm and poetry class - or, rap class. We became fast friends and kind of stick together all the time now.”

“Sounds like we’ve both met some decent people,” Gi Wook smiled. Sunwoo couldn’t help but smile back at his old friend; he’d really, really missed their time together. “I’m actually in a new band, up in the busy city with some guys trying to kick-start their career. They heard about the band I was in with you, the rapping we did, and they asked for my help. I said yes.”

“That’s awesome!” Sunwoo exclaimed. “You can kind of pick up where we left off.”

“Yeah. I’m teaching Harin-hyung and Kanghyun-hyung how to write lyrics, just like you taught me! We’re working on a new song called ‘Regulus.’ You should come check it out when we finish, give us some feedback,” Gi Wook offered. 

Watching Gi Wook speak about his new friends, seeing the pure excitement and adoration on his face . . . it hit Sunwoo right in that moment that he and Gi Wook had gone separate directions and would never be the close friends they used to be. 

They had new friends, friends that suited them better. Cya had his new band, Sunwoo had his new job. They were both incredibly happy where they were at, no matter how much they complained.

The memory of Named Late (their band) would always be just that now - a memory. Something for them to look back on with nostalgia, something that taught them and grew them and furnished their dreams. 

But they’d never be close friends anymore. Friends for sure, oh yes - Sunwoo wouldn’t give Cya up for anything - friends who could still love and support and encourage each other from time to time.

But they’d both moved on.

It hurt.

Of course it did.

But Sunwoo couldn’t be happier for the time he’d had with Cya, and the time he had now with his new friends. 

“I don’t think you’ll need my help,” he murmured honestly to Cya. His voice was quiet, a little strained, but also free at the same time. When he looked up into Cya’s gaze, he knew the other understood. “You were always better than me anyway.”

“We’re all special in our own way, Seonoo,” Cya whispered back. “Your voice is uniquely yours, and someone someday will appreciate that. You’ll fulfill your dream of becoming a rapper soon enough.” He glanced at Youngjae, smiled, then prodded Sunwoo with a knowing look. “You’re nearly there already. The people you need are merely waiting for you to give them the word.”

Warmth struck Sunwoo’s heart as he realized. Something like euphoria washed over his body, and his spirit lifted into the air for the first time in years. He didn’t feel bad about letting Cya go anymore. He didn’t feel bad about losing the past anymore. 

He could free himself from the burden of letting his old friends down. 

Why?

Because he had an even brighter future ahead of him.

“Thank you, hyung.”

He and Gi Wook embraced again, this time as a final goodbye instead of a new hello. Sunwoo tucked his nose into Cya’s neck, let the heady scent of ocean and forest wash over him one last time. Something between them had shifted, a sort of sadness that hovered but also freed the chains tying them to what they used to be. 

They would still be friends, but they’d no longer fulfill their dreams together. And that was okay.

“I guess I’d better let my friends know we won’t be working together after all,” Cya murmured once they’d pulled back. He gazed at Sunwoo with fondness in his eyes. “Unless, of course, you want to join us? The boys would never deny someone as good as you.”

One last chance to make the past come true. One last chance for Sunwoo to ditch everything he had and fulfill his dreams with a life-long friend.

And he seriously considered for a second. The thought of debuting in just a few short months, of getting his voice and his talents out there . . . so, so tempting. He’d have everything he could possibly want.

Except, when he looked at Youngjae, and saw the fear bubbling in his best friend’s dark eyes, and the silent plea for him to stay, he realized.

Going with Cya, he’d have everything he wanted - a friend, fame, fans, fun. So much to live for, so much to offer. 

He’d have everything, except one thing. 

Family. 

And he already had one, right here where he worked and studied and strove for his dreams. Family was more important to him than any career or talent he could ever have.

Family was his ultimate dream.

So he smiled up at Gi Wook, tears threatening to spill over, then turned his gaze to Youngjae and locked it on him, hand reaching across the space between them to interlock their fingers together. “Thank you, Cya-hyung. But I have everything I need right here with me.”

“Very well then.” That knowing smile still on his lips, Gi Wook made for the door, hesitated, then said, “I’ll be seeing you around, Sun. Call me if you ever want to hang out.”

Then he was gone.

In the long silence that followed, Sunwoo could only stare at the floor and try not to cry. He hated crying. He never cried, especially in front of his friends.

But he had a right to cry, didn’t he? He’d just thrown his high school dream down the drain forever. 

It didn’t help that Youngjae was next to him sniffling, and crushing his hand so tight in his grip his fingers had lost all feeling. Sunwoo had never realized how much he meant to his best friend. How frightened must Youngjae have been when a stranger he’d never met had nearly succeeded in snatching Sunwoo away from him forever? 

Sunwoo knew he would have regretted going with Cya at some point, and that was why, despite the lingering pain and longing in his heart, he felt at peace with his decision. 

“Why didn’t you go with him?”

Eric’s quiet voice startled Sunwoo. He lifted his head to see a pair of puffy, red eyes staring at him with a well of gratitude. That look. That look was exactly why Sunwoo hadn’t gone with Cya. 

“You could have achieved your dream,” Eric whispered, voice catching. “You could have been so happy.”

“My dad once told me that the biggest dream anyone can have is a family,” Sunwoo murmured. “I’d be nothing if I had fame and a career but not a family.” He reached up to wipe away a stray tear that had escaped him. He latched onto Youngjae’s gaze, drowned in it and let it soothe away the longing in his heart that told him to run back to Cya and join him. “That’s why, no matter how much I desperately want to achieve my dream with Gi Wook, I know I’d never be happy. I’d be leaving behind the family I already have here.”

Youngjae’s lower lip trembled. Sunwoo pleaded silently with his friend not to cry. If Youngjae broke down, Sunwoo knew he wouldn’t be able to keep from crying either. There’d be no way for him to get his homework done after that, because he always got severe migraines after he cried. 

Thankfully, Youngjae managed to suck in his emotions with one giant sniffle. He finally released Sunwoo’s hand in favor of grabbing a tissue and blowing his nose in an obnoxiously gross manner.

The atmosphere lightened.

“You should have let me talk to him,” Youngjae said once he’d tossed his tissue at the trash can and missed. “He seemed cool.”

“I wouldn’t do that even if my life depended on it,” Sunwoo grinned. “You’d probably say something to him you’d regret.”

“You’re right. I was going to tell him that together our hair looked like the American flag - red, white, and blue.”

It was so funny and so out of context right after an emotional session, that Sunwoo could not have stopped himself from emitting his donkey laughter even if he had tried.

“You’re so weird, Eric,” he giggled, and grabbed his friend by the wrist to drag him back into his room where their homework still lay open on his desk. “Forget homework for just a second, okay?”

Youngjae shot him a questioning look. “Why?”

Sunwoo smirked. “Because I know exactly what to do with the boys on Friday night.”

——

“We’re going to do what now?”

“Auditions! I’ve heard you guys sing or rap before, and I think if we tried, we could really make something out of this.”

“Not fair! We’ve never heard you sing or rap before!”

Sunwoo had asked Youngjae, Changmin, and Haknyeon (Joonyoung’s other roommate) to meet him and the other baristas at Joonyoung’s place after work. Cya had sparked an idea in his mind, and he wanted to get started on it as soon as possible. 

“That’s because of a promise I made to a friend back in high school,” Sunwoo explained to Younghoon. “Gi Wook-hyung and I promised each other we’d never sing or rap for anyone until we’d debuted together.”

“So what changed?” Sangyeon asked. He was sprawled across the floor of the apartment, legs laying across Joonyoung’s feet. 

Ruefully, Sunwoo admitted, “I met my friend two days ago and we mutually agreed to break the promise. He’s already preparing to debut in a band in a few months anyway, and he knows I’m happy where I’m at. We didn’t want to drag each other down merely because of an obligation.”

“Mature,” Joonyoung nodded. “I hope you left on good terms.”

“They did,” Youngjae cut in. He leaned forward from his spot on the floor. “Also, I don’t think you guys are grasping how hard it was for Sunwoo-hyung to make this decision. I was there when he talked with his friend, and I could tell for a split second that he was about to say yes. He was about to ditch us all for his old friend. But he didn’t.”

Sangyeon gazed at Sunwoo curiously. “Why didn’t you?”

Great. Sunwoo was embarrassed now. How could he tell them the truth without getting made fun of?

Everybody knew he didn’t share his feelings often. When he did, they knew he was sincere. But it still made him feel weird and vulnerable in a way he didn’t like. Plus, they all teased him about it later (in a nice way, of course).

But opening up was how people became family, right?

Sunwoo cleared his throat. “Cya-hyung and I met in high school and formed a four-member band called ‘Named Late.’ We weren’t horribly popular, but we loved the band and we loved each other. We did everything together. We ate together, messed around together, talked about lyrics together, did our homework together, even shared our darkest secrets with each other.

“Over time, we came to consider each other best friends. We were inseparable. We’d always stand up for each other and encourage each other. Cya-hyung is basically the reason I became interested in rapping and lyric-writing. He’s the one who instilled in me the biggest dream I’ve ever had.

“Our senior year of high school, we knew what was coming. We’d been accepted into different schools, far away from each other. Our schools still did collaborations sometimes, of course, but it would never be the same.

“So we made a promise. We’d never perform for anyone again until we’d formed a new band with each other. It was a great idea, and a way to ensure that we never lost each other when one of us became popular at school. In the end, we’d find fame together.

“I was looking forward to that day for so long - that day when I could hold him in my arms again, and we’d hear the screams of fans around us, and feel our guitars beneath our fingers. That adrenaline and high of doing what you love with the people you love.”

Sunwoo had closed his eyes, head tilted up toward the sky as he imagined the very scene he was describing. He’d always loved performing for people, and it had been so hard to hold back. Now he could let go and rap for all he was worth. His eyes watered. 

“I stopped hearing from him for a while, except for an occasional text. I thought he’d forgotten how much our promise meant to me. Then a friend of Changmin’s arranged for us to meet, and when I saw Gi Wook-hyung standing there at my door, I thought all my dreams were about to come true.

“We only talked for a few minutes. He told me about this new band he was debuting with soon. I realized, watching him, that he’d found his place in the world, and it wasn’t with me. He was happy; he didn’t need me anymore.

“I couldn’t let a stupid promise weigh him down. So when he offered to let me join the band, and through that offer told me he remembered our promise, I seriously considered it. He was so happy, why shouldn’t I be too? This was my dream too, and he was giving me a chance to make it come true. He was offering me the chance of a lifetime.”

Sunwoo paused, collecting himself. He could feel Youngjae’s hand on his back, offering support. Joonyoung was smiling at him softly. Just more proof that he’d made the right decision.

“When I looked at Eric, though, I saw . . . I saw myself. I saw myself being happy. And I saw how much I meant to you, and you to me. I’d never find this kind of happiness with Cya-hyung, no matter how much I desperately wished for it to be true.

“I’m no one without someone around me to love and support me. I’m no one without someone to correct me and guide me. And though I treat you guys like I hate you and despise you, deep down inside I’ve always known - all of you are that ‘someone.’ I’d never have made it this far without you. 

“And that’s what made me say no to Gi Wook-hyung. Not the fact that my dream had changed, or that I wanted it any less. Just that I realized something.

“All of you are my dream.”

Sunwoo’s story brought a long silence. Youngjae had snuggled up to his side and wrapped him in a warm embrace. Sunwoo thought he spied a few tears slipping from Joonyoung’s and Changmin’s eyes. No, they hadn’t realized how hard it had been for him to deny Cya. 

And no, they’d never realized how much Sunwoo cared for them. He never showed emotions other than anger or fear, and that made them question all the time whether or not Sunwoo appreciated them the way they appreciated him. Now they knew. And they were speechless at the raw emotions he’d displayed.

“Guys,” Juyeon whispered, wiping the back of his hand across his eyes. “Sunwoo-yah gave up his biggest dream for us.”

“No one’s ever done that for me before,” Younghoon whispered dumbly. He was absently staring at the wall as he digested what he’d just heard. “I feel so important now.”

Typical Younghoon. Shattering the moment with his silly, self-righteous comments. Joonyoung snorted past the mucus in his throat, and Juyeon scoffed. 

“Sunwoo just pours his heart out and all you have to say is something about yourself?” Juyeon smacked Younghoon’s shoulder. “You’re so selfish.”

“It wasn’t a lie!” Younghoon protested, but got drowned out by a clamor of voices teasingly chastening him for his pride.

Sunwoo watched them with a warm smile on his lips. They just had this knack for making him laugh even when he didn’t want to - like the other day, when Younghoon slapped a piece of dough on his neck. Or that time Joonyoung laughed so hard milk shot out his nose. And Changmin . . . Changmin didn’t even have to try. He was funny whether he meant to be or not. 

The moment didn’t last long, however, as Sangyeon, who’d been watching Sunwoo with a look of contemplation on his features, asked, “You were lovers, weren’t you? You and Cya?” 

Sunwoo’s smile faded. He couldn’t help but feel betrayed by Sangyeon’s question. How dare he ask that now, when it had been so clear Sunwoo was hurt by what had happened two days ago. Sunwoo wasn’t ready to talk about that aspect of his life yet.

But fine. If Sangyeon wanted answers, he’d get them.

Sunwoo opened his mouth to angrily snap back, but Sangyeon beat him to it.

“That’s why you said no to him,” the eldest murmured. The others had taken notice of the question and quieted. Joonyoung was giving Sangyeon a warning glare, as if he could tell Sunwoo had already reached his limit tonight. “It wasn’t because he was happy with a new band. You could have easily fit in as you did before. No, it was because he was happy with a new lover.”

“Sangyeon! Seriously?” Joonyoung hissed. “He’s already hurting! Stop making it worse!”

“It’s fine, Jacob-hyung.” Sunwoo lifted his chin defiantly in Sangyeon’s direction, eyes blazing with fire. “Yes, Cya-hyung and I were lovers. We were together for four years before he broke it off. That was right before I started working at your café. I thought it was because he couldn’t handle being in a long-distance relationship, but two days ago I realized it was because he’d found someone else. Someone in his band. It was like he’d chosen to fulfill our dream without me, with someone else in my place.

“And yes, it hurts like heck. I can’t even begin to describe the feeling, or the pain that seems to rack my chest with every beat of my heart. I  loved  him, hyung. I still do. But he broke our promise and our relationship for the sake of one person. I feel worthless to him now.

“But don’t think I’m going to let him ruin my life. I’m happy right here where I am with you guys, and I intend to make the best of that. Cya-hyung and I will remain friends, of course, but you will always have first in my heart now. It’ll take some time to recover, but I know with your help, I can.”

By the time he’d finished speaking, Joonyoung had moved across the room and completely wrapped Sunwoo up in his arms. He’d positioned himself so his back was facing the others, and no one could see Sunwoo’s expression or badger him any further. 

“It’s okay to be hurt, Sun,” he whispered. His breath fanned over Sunwoo’s right ear. “Don’t bottle up your emotions, or you’ll never feel better.”

Sunwoo lost it at that. He absolutely, totally lost it. 

He’d tried so hard to hold things in since he’d seen Gi Wook, tried so hard to hide the pain behind his smile or his jokes. But honestly, he’d been violently torn apart inside when he’d realized he’d been ditched and lied to for a whole year. And what was more, he’d been replaced by someone else, and his only chance of achieving the one dream he’d always had shattered. 

He didn’t blame Gi Wook, no. He never could. It’s hard to hate someone when you’ve only ever loved them with your entire being. And Gi Wook had been gentle when he’d broken up with Sunwoo.

The only thing he’d done wrong was not tell Sunwoo why. It’s scary telling someone why you’re breaking up with them, especially if it’s because you found someone better. It’s like telling that person you used to love that they aren’t good enough anymore. 

Sunwoo understood. He really did.

And yet, he still hurt so much. 

He needed to get that pain out, or he’d do something terrible and never recover from it. He had friends now. Heck, he’d just given up his last chance to fulfill his dream for them. They would never hurt him, and they would always stand by his side when he needed them. 

Which was why he pushed past his pride and shamelessly cried his heart out in front of them. 

For a long while, the only sounds in the room were his anguished sobs and sniffles. His hands were clenched in Joonyoung’s shirt, and he could feel his hyung’s arms around his head and body, as if providing him a circle of protection. Joonyoung’s head rested on top of his, nose occasionally nuzzling into his rose-red hair. Warmth flooded between the two of them.

Eventually, the other boys gathered around them. Some patted Sunwoo’s head or back, others whispered words of encouragement to him. Sangyeon continuously apologized for bringing up the subject.

At some point, Sunwoo realized that he already felt better. The hurt and grief were coming off of him in waves, disappearing into the air and leaving his heart lighter than he ever thought it could be right now. Joonyoung had been right. Crying truly did help a grieving soul heal. 

Perhaps five or ten minutes later, Sunwoo’s sobs faded into an occasional loud sniff, and his body stopped shaking. His heart stopped racing as well, and even though his head hurt from the force of his crying, he felt significantly better.

Sunwoo pulled back from Joonyoung. “Thank you,” he mumbled out. Haknyeon handed him a tissue. “And sorry, for making you all see that.”

Juyeon reached out and stroked a hand through his hair. “Don’t apologize to us for showing pain, Sunwoo,” he said. “It’s natural, and sharing your burden with someone else makes it easier for you to carry.”

Sunwoo blew his nose, sighed, wiped his eyes dry. The smile that he flashed at his friends was pained, but full of hope and a gratefulness that could never be expressed through words. 

They understood.

Both Youngjae and Changmin offered Sunwoo quick supportive hugs. Then the circle broke up and everyone returned to their seats, except Joonyoung, who remained by Sunwoo’s side with their hands linked. 

“Sunwoo-yah,” Younghoon called from the couch, catching everyone’s attention. “I’ll do it. I’ll do the audition.”

Almost immediately, Juyeon nodded. “So will I.”

“Me too,” Changmin agreed.

“We all will,” Sangyeon said. Those who hadn’t answered nodded. “The only question is, when are we all available?”

“Fridays always seem to be a good day for us,” Haknyeon commented. “We could meet here next week, same time. And we could have a little party too, with pizza and sodas and snacks and desserts.”

“Pizza?!” Youngjae screeched. And just like that, everybody was laughing again.


	2. New Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunwoo runs into Pink Hair again, and gets to meet his roommates, Hyungseo and Hyunjae.

“Hey, look, it’s my least favorite barista,” was the only warning Sunwoo got of Pink Hair’s arrival on Saturday afternoon. 

He’d been casually wiping down a dirty table, minding his own wonderful business, when the voice, accompanied by a pair of Vans at the edge of his sight, made its arrival.

Sunwoo really didn’t want to talk to Pink Hair today.

“Hey, look, it’s my least favorite customer,” he shot back, slapping the rag against the table. Without another word, he straightened up and walked off toward the back room. 

“Yah! You can’t walk away without making my drink!” Pink Hair shouted at him. 

“Sue me,” Sunwoo spat back. 

He calmly flew around the corner and out of Pink Hair’s sight. 

“YAH! I’LL HAUL YOUR BIG BUTT OUT HERE ALONG WITH YOUR BIG MOUTH IF YOU DON’T COME OUT HERE AND SERVE ME RIGHT THIS INSTANT!”

Sangyeon, who’d been furiously scribbling profits and finances in his little corner, raised both eyebrows at Sunwoo. “I think that’s for you,” he stated, referring to the lunatic screaming his head off in the lobby. 

Sunwoo scoffed. “He won’t die if I don’t serve him.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” Sangyeon snickered as Pink Hair’s voice rang out again. 

Sunwoo sighed. He’d have to go out there, if not to placate Pink Hair, then to stop him from disturbing the peace. 

“Save me,” he grumbled to Sangyeon, and jerked a finger across his neck to prove that he was about to die. “I might have to throw this guy out.”

“Make sure to shower him with hearts on the way out.”

“The frick I’m going to do that.”

Sunwoo bid Sangyeon farewell by sticking his tongue out at the elder boy, then stepped out of the back room to meet his doom.

Almost immediately, Pink Hair zeroed in on him. “Ha! I knew you’d come out.”

“Yeah, because if I didn’t, you’d be put in jail for shouting.”

Pink Hair looked offended. “Shouting isn’t a crime.”

“It’s called disturbing the peace, you idiot. Look it up.”

“I’d rather look at a coffee.”

“Oh my god.” Sunwoo pinched the bridge of his nose in patient frustration. “You’re insufferable.”

“Thanks, it’s a talent,” Pink Hair smiled. “Now make me a vanilla latte.”

Instead of giving in, Sunwoo crossed his arms over his chest and raised his chin at Pink Hair. “And why should I do that?”

Pink Hair batted his eyelashes. “Because I asked nicely.”

“You literally shouted at me ten seconds ago. And you didn’t even ask, you demanded.”

“Well, then, hmm.” Pink Hair tapped his index finger against his chin, eyes staring into the distance as he thought. “Then maybe because it’s your job?”

“Wow, would you look at that, you actually gave me a valid reason,” Sunwoo muttered dryly. “Fine. Go sit down and I’ll bring your latte out to you.”

“Oooo. Customer service.” Pink Hair waggled his eyebrows; Sunwoo made a face at him in return. 

“Just go sit.”

Pink Hair did, and Sunwoo got down to making his drink (correctly, this time). While he worked on meticulously pouring the cream into the latte for a perfect design, Sangyeon stopped by to check on him.

“I see you managed to settle our screamer down. How’d you do it?”

“Simple. I walked out here.”

Sangyeon chuckled unbelievingly. “Are you serious?”

“He wanted me to make his drink. He got me, he stopped complaining.”

“Wow.” Sangyeon watched Sunwoo concentrate on pouring the cream, the younger’s tongue poking out from the corner of his mouth. Sunwoo had always had impressively steady hands, and it showed now as he hovered his hand over the mug without shaking or spilling the slightest bit. “I’ve never seen a customer take to you like that.”

Sunwoo chanced a careful grin up at Sangyeon. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, hyung.”

Sangyeon smacked his forehead. “That’s not what I meant, Seonoo. You do a great job here, that’s why I don’t get on to you much. I just meant that I’ve never seen a customer so interested in your coffees that they’d literally shout for you to make theirs every time.”

“What can I say, I make spanking good coffees.”

By now, Sunwoo had put the pitcher of cream down, and Sangyeon used that opportunity to playfully push his employee. Sunwoo squeaked as a result, but only retaliated by punching Sangyeon in the arm.

“Hey, once you hand that drink out, go ahead and take your break, okay?”

“Yeah. Thanks, hyung.”

Sunwoo quickly finished setting Pink Hair’s latte on a tray. He topped it off by spraying a mountain of whipped cream over the empty half of the tray and jabbing a spoon in the mass of fluff.

Afterwards, he set the tray down on the table where Pink Hair patiently waited. 

“Why a tray?” the one in question asked. He was gazing at the whipped cream with hearts in his eyes, and Sunwoo made a mental note to remember that for later. “My order was ‘to go.’”

“First of all, you don’t stay, you don’t get whipped cream,” Sunwoo grinned. He laughed when Pink Hair’s face flushed red. “Secondly, you might find that it’s better to study in a different atmosphere.”

Pink Hair’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “How do you know I go to study after coming here everyday?”

Time to blow his mind. “For starters, most jobs don’t allow you to drink coffees, so I know you’re most likely not going to work. Then there’s the school logo on the uniform you wore the first day you came in - a local university that I know well. Third, the backpack that you drop by the door whenever you come in. And finally, the laptop and school books that I saw peeking out of the top of your backpack that one time you accidentally left it open.”

Pink Hair’s jaw hit the floor. “Wow. Kudos to you for being the most pointlessly observant person on the planet.”

“It’s never pointless to be observant.” Sunwoo untied his apron from behind his back and hung it up on one of the hooks for later. To his surprise and delight, Pink Hair was still there when he turned back around. “Are you going to stay?”

Pink Hair gave him a “duh” look. “You threatened me with whipped cream elimination. I must do everything in my power to keep whipped cream by my side.”

“Or on your plate, you mean,” Sunwoo chuckled. 

“Or that.”

Pink Hair and Sunwoo locked gazes in the silence that followed, both of them fighting off smiles but failing. Sunwoo felt something in his heart moving, heating up and welding a fragment of his shattered heart back together. For the first time in a long time, Cya had fled his mind.

“Do I annoy you?” Pink Hair suddenly blurted out.

“Yes.”

Pink Hair looked almost offended by the lack of hesitation in Sunwoo’s voice. “Then let me make it up to you. I’ll buy you a coffee and we can sit and talk until your break is over.”

Sunwoo blinked. He had not been expecting that at all. “How did you know I was on break?”

“I’m not deaf, idiot. I heard your boss telling you to go on break. That, and you just put your apron up.”

“Touché. But there’s no point in getting me a coffee, you know. I get it here for free,” Sunwoo pointed out mildly.

Pink Hair didn’t seem to mind; in fact, he merely shook his head with a lopsided smile. “It’s more meaningful if I buy it for you.”

Okay. This was new. Under any normal circumstance, this would be considered a date. But Sunwoo, because of his recent feelings about Gi Wook and his misgivings with Pink Hair, would take it as an apology.

“Fine. Then get me a Java Chip frappe. It’s my favorite.”

“Interesting. Sweet, but with a bitter edge. Just like you.”

Sunwoo coughed on his own spit. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

Man, he really wanted to wipe that smirk off Pink Hair’s face.

“Oh, yeah? Then you’re just like whipped cream: soft and fluffy, but too much can make you sick.”

“Ha. Good one.”

Sunwoo would have added more, but Pink Hair glided over to the register to order the Java Chip frappe. Deciding he had nothing better to do, Sunwoo elected to sit at Chanhee's table and wait for his new friend. 

On his way there, Juyeon leaned over and asked, “Did you guys just simultaneously diss and compliment each other?”

“Shut up,” Sunwoo said.

It didn’t take long for him to find his seat, or for Pink Hair to grab his drink and join him at the table.

As Pink Hair slipped into his chair and Sunwoo took the first sip of his drink, they studied each other across the table.

Pink Hair had an interesting fashion sense, Sunwoo had to admit. Jeans with the legs rolled up, a denim jacket with one side longer than the other, and a yellow-and-red striped shirt. A pair of Vans and a single silver rectangular earring with a letter engraved on its front completed the look. 

A different look, but Sunwoo liked it. (He himself always chose to wear jeans or sweatpants, a t-shirt/jacket, and slippers/Vans, so he had no say when it came to good fashion.)

“So why do you like annoying me so much?” he asked, casually playing with his straw.

Pink Hair shot him a look over his mug. “Why do you always annoy me back?”

“Nobody said you had to stay and wait for me to annoy you.”

“True, but I already established that you entertain me. I’m just curious as to why you annoy me back.”

“Self-defense, obviously. I’m not going to let you tease me without tormenting you back.”

“Except in your case, you were serious the first time we met.”

“The heck I was. A random stranger came in here and started making fun of me. I’m not just going to let that slide.”

Pink Hair finally gave in with a shrug. “Well, as long as we’re on mutual grounds now, all is well.” He lifted his mug to his lips to take a sip. Sunwoo watched as his eyes slipped shut in pleasure when the taste hit the back of his throat. 

Score.

He’d been told more than once that he made the best lattes in the city. 

“This is amazing,” Pink Hair complimented. “Is this why Sangyeon-hyung has you in charge of the drinks?”

“Absolut-“ 

Wait a second. 

Sunwoo set his drink down on the table and glared suspiciously at the boy across the table. “You know Sangyeon-hyung?”

“Um, yeah. He lives in the apartment right across from me.”

Interesting. Not that it mattered, because Sunwoo didn’t know where Sangyeon’s apartment was, even though he’d asked to visit at least a hundred times. 

“I moved in about a year ago with my two roommates, and Sangyeon introduced himself to us a few months later. Told us about the café he ran and asked us to come visit some day. I was really craving coffee on Tuesday, so voilà, here I was!”

“Wow,” Sunwoo summed up. “He must be a fun neighbor.”

Pink Hair leaned back. “I can’t tell if that was sarcastic or not.”

“I’m not sure either,” Sunwoo giggled. He noticed Pink Hair watching him with an unreadable expression. “Sangyeon-hyung is really strict here at work, but he’s fun to hang out with outside work. I’ve never thought about what he would be like as a neighbor, though.”

“Well, in that case, let me put your fears to rest. Sangyeon-hyung is a great neighbor. He likes to drop by often just to talk, and he used to bring goodies for us once a week. Really nice guy.”

Sunwoo dropped back against his chair and crossed his arms over his chest, pouting. “He never makes me goodies.” 

Pink Hair chuckled at him endearingly. “Why don’t you just ask him?”

“You kidding me? He’d just tell me that I already get free coffees at work so I don’t deserve free goodies too.”

“Still doesn’t hurt to try.”

“Eh, you’re right. I’ll ask him right after my shift is over.”

“Or I could make you something.”

The prospect of receiving food in general already had Sunwoo’s mouth watering, but the fact that it was Pink Hair offering to bake him something made things ten times better. “Yes, please,” he said plaintively. “I can’t remember the last time somebody baked something for me.”

“Then it’s settled. I’ll bring you something tomorrow.”

“Thanks.” Sunwoo offered Pink Hair one of his rare radiant smiles, where his lips were lifted so high his eyes scrunched up into crescents he could barely see out of, and his whole face lit up with happiness. Something in Pink Hair’s expression faltered at that. “Before we continue, I realized we’ve met four times and I never got your name. I’m Kim Sunwoo, by the way.”

“I know,” Pink Hair laughed. “It’s on your name tag.”

Sunwoo directed his gaze down to his chest, where his name tag shone from above his heart. He’d gotten so used to it he’d completely forgotten it was there. “Not fair,” he whined, pouting at Pink Hair. “You’ve known this whole time, haven’t you?”

“Of course.”

“And yet you still chose to call me ‘idiot’ or ‘weirdo’ this whole time.”

“It’s more interesting that way,” Pink Hair snickered. He took another sip of his latte, watching Sunwoo’s face morph into an expression of unamusement, then he murmured, “Chanhee. My name is Choi Chanhee.”

Chanhee. Seemed perfect, somehow, for the pink-haired boy. The name fit his personality, his fashion, everything about him. It fit his smile even better.

Choi Chanhee.

Sunwoo’s new friend.

“Its a pleasure to officially meet you, Chanhee-ssi.”

“You too, Sunwoo-ssi.”

A semi-awkward, sort of comfortable silence fell between them. Sunwoo didn’t know if Chanhee liked a continuous flow of conversation or not. He didn’t know almost anything about Chanhee, when he thought about it.

“You know,” Chanhee suddenly interrupted, “if I took a picture of this mug, it would become a mug shot.”

Sunwoo couldn’t help but stare at Chanhee in question. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“I did, but like, where did that even come from?”

“Where else would it come from? My brain.”

“I  know,  it was just so random. I wasn’t expecting it is all.”

“Good.”

Staring at Chanhee for a good three seconds, Sunwoo gave up the conversation with a shrug. He didn’t get Chanhee, really he didn’t. But at least the guy made him laugh a lot; that had to count for something.

“Sunwoo-ssi, are you in college as well?”

“Yes. I’m a sophomore at the university right down the street, Mingsu’s School of Fine Arts.”

“Ah. I’m a second semester junior. Math major.”

“Ew, math? You don’t ever want to do dancing or singing or something like that?”

Chanhee grinned at Sunwoo. “I’m a vocal minor and I take dance classes every Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday.”

“What, math homework doesn’t take you forever?” Sunwoo said cheekily. 

Chanhee glared at Sunwoo unimpressed. “Surprise, some people are good at math. I’m a level one in Abacus and mental calculation.”

Sunwoo’s eyes widened, and he whistled appreciatively. “I’m calling you if our registers ever break down.”

“Please do,” Chanhee chuckled softly. “But only if you pay me.”

“Psh. You have to become an employee first.”

“Then I won’t help you.”

“Rude.”

“Bite me.”

“Screw you.”

Chanhee grabbed a napkin which he wadded up and threw at Sunwoo’s face. It landed smack on his forehead and bounced off to drop against the table, so Sunwoo used the opportunity to wail in fake agony.

“My face! My beautiful face! It’s ruined forever!”

“Oh, stop being dramatic. You’re fine.” Chanhee nudged Sunwoo’s foot under the table.

“Never.”

The two boys fell into a fit of soft laughter, eyeing each other with what could only be described as endearment. They’d only known each other for a few days at most, but they already felt as if they’d known each other for a lifetime. There was something genuinely unique about their relationship.

Chanhee took a moment after their bickering to check his phone for the time. When the numbers flashed up at him, he smiled at Sunwoo apologetically. 

“I have to get going, I’m having dinner with my roommates tonight,” he explained. Sunwoo completely understood. Changmin could be aggressive about getting free food from him sometimes. “Maybe I’ll come back tomorrow?”

Sunwoo shook his head. “I don’t work on Sundays. I’ll have to see you Monday.”

“That’s fine with me.” Chanhee stood and slung his backpack around his shoulders. He offered Sunwoo a gentle smile. “Also, since I’m older, you can call me hyung.”

Without another word, he was gone.

——

Monday came, and Sunwoo’s heart was beating faster than the wings of a hummingbird. He couldn’t keep his mind off Chanhee or the dessert he knew he’d be getting in a few minutes, and his coworkers had noticed.

Unfortunately.

“You seem a bit . . . fidgety today, Sunwoo-yah,” Sangyeon said at one point, walking by while balancing a tower of plates precariously on his left forearm. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just waiting for someone. A customer,” he explained, to which Sangyeon’s eyebrows shot up in the air. Sunwoo never mentioned customers. 

Unless it was to complain about them. 

“Who is it? A regular?” the owner asked.

Sunwoo hated it when one of his friends pried about people he mentioned, but he knew Sangyeon and therefore he knew he wouldn’t be able to hide for long. Plus, Sangyeon could tell almost instantly when he had an interest in someone.

He should just tell him.

“Yeah, uh, he’s actually your neighbor. Choi Chanhee.”

This news had Sangyeon’s eyebrows climbing even higher. “Really?” A look of contemplation settled over his features. “Hmm. I wouldn’t have pictured you two together, but now that I think about, you fit together well.” Sangyeon nodded in satisfaction. “He’s a good choice, Sun. Let me know how things go with him, okay?”

Like he was going to do that. His private life was his private life.

“Wait, is our Seonoo interested in someone?”

_Oh, no, kill me now,_ Sunwoo groaned to himself. The others had heard their conversation - or at least, the tail end of it.

There was no use hiding now. “You guys know that one customer who’s been coming in a lot this week? The pink haired one?”

Juyeon eyed Sunwoo suspiciously. “Is this the same customer you keep fighting with? The customer you gave caffeinated coffee when he specifically asked for decaffeinated?”

Sunwoo scratched the back of his neck and awkwardly averted his gaze. “Um, yeah?”

“You’re interested in him?” Juyeon asked, incredulous.

“Maybe? I think so? I’m not really sure. I don’t want to escalate things too quickly in case this is my mind’s way of forgetting Cya-hyung. It wouldn’t be fair to Chanhee-hyung.”

“For what it’s worth, Sun, you met Chanhee before the whole situation with Cya,” Joonyoung pointed out softly. “If you already liked him then, chances are your feelings for him are genuine.”

“I know,” Sunwoo replied, a little frustrated. He took a rag and wrung it out, then began to wipe down his section of the counter. “I’m just so confused about him. He annoyed me when we first met, but at the same time, he always made me feel better by the time he left. Now I don’t know if I’m developing feelings as a reaction to Gi Wook-hyung’s rejection or because I really like him.”

“Then make your main focus right now getting to know him better,” Younghoon piped up. Sunwoo knew it would be worth listening to him, as he’d been in a failed relationship before he met Juyeon. He knew how to approach these types of situations. “Don’t give into your feelings, but also don’t forget them entirely. Grow closer to him and get to know him for who he is. At some point down the road, it’ll become crystal clear if your feelings for him are real or not.”

“That’s good advice,” Sangyeon murmured. “And from what I’ve seen, Chanhee is definitely interested in you as well. Time will tell, so just be patient in getting to know him.”

Their words of advice already made Sunwoo feel better about approaching Chanhee. He didn’t want to give the pink-haired boy hope if this really was just a fluke of his feelings, but neither did he want to push the older boy away when his feelings were real. 

It was best just to wait and become friends first.

“Excuse me.”

The soft voice entered the quiet atmosphere of the café, and Sunwoo turned to check and see who it was. Not anybody he knew - pale complexion, warm eyes, deep crevices around their mouth, black cap - but they were tilting their head and squinting at a paper tied to a big pink box. 

“Is there a . . . Kim Sunwoo? . . . here?”

Surprised, Sunwoo blinked. Who was this person and how did they know him?

“Ah, I’m Kim Sunwoo,” he said, wiping his hands on a towel and moving to the counter where the stranger stood. “Who are you?”

The stranger flashed him a friendly smile. “I’m Moon Hyungseo, Choi Chanhee’s roommate. He asked me to give these to you for him today.”

Everything made sense now, but Sunwoo was worried. Chanhee has promised to bring him the goodies himself, so why wasn’t he here? Still, Sunwoo accepted the box and saw a flash of pink under the laminate. Of course. Pink seemed to be Chanhee’s color.

Sunwoo scooched the box closer, held it protectively under his arms, but this wasn’t his main concern anymore, no matter how much he wanted to try the treat. He met Hyungseo’s gaze. “Is Chanhee-hyung okay? He said he’d bring these himself.”

Something akin to affirmation slipped over Hyungseo’s face before the pale boy fixed his regular smile over his lips. “He’s sick. Woke up this morning with a cough and a low-grade fever.”

Sunwoo’s heart clenched. The very thought of Chanhee being sick made him want to run over there and coddle the boy, and wow, maybe his feelings were already way more developed than he’d thought. Some of his friends he wouldn’t help out if they were sick (okay, that’s a lie, he loved all of them deeply), so being so worried about Chanhee after meeting him four times said a lot.

“He didn’t make these when he was sick, did he?” Sunwoo asked suspiciously.

Hyungseo just laughed. “No, Chanhee’s not that stupid. He made them last night before he went to bed.”

“Good. Cause if he did, I would’ve killed him.”

“Only after Hyunjae-hyung and I killed him,” Hyungseo chuckled. 

“Who’s Hyunjae?” Sunwoo hoped he didn’t sound jealous when he asked that. He had no place to be.

Thankfully, Hyungseo put his fears to rest. “Our other roommate. The three of us have been best friends for years now.”

Best friends. Not boyfriends. 

Sunwoo still had a chance.

“I see,” Sunwoo nodded. “Well, tell Chanhee-hyung I say thank you, and that I hope he feels better soon.”

“Will do. And Sunwoo-ssi?”

“Yes?”

“Chanhee doesn’t bake goodies for just anyone. If he did this for you, it means he values you just as much as he does me or Hyunjae-hyung. Be sure to appreciate him for that, or I will make sure the two of you never talk again.”

Whoa. That kind of a threat coming from a stranger, Chanhee’s best friend none the less, and so forceful . . . well, if Sunwoo wasn’t already going to be careful walking into this friendship with Chanhee, he definitely was now. 

But honestly, Sunwoo was thankful for the warning. It would make sure he was patient with Chanhee, and would hold him accountable on the small chance they went further with their friendship. 

Plus, it said a lot about Chanhee’s character. If someone was this willing to watch out for him, then he must have some decent character qualities in him.

“I’ll do my best,” Sunwoo promised, and bowed to seal his fate. Hyungseo had permission to kill him if he didn’t appreciate Chanhee. 

Hyungseo nodded, satisfied. “Good. Then I look forward to seeing you sometime in the future.”

The pale boy was just about to leave, when something clicked in Sunwoo’s brain, and he couldn’t help but call out for Hyungseo to stop. “Is Korean your second language? You have a slight accent.”

Surprise flitted over Hyungseo’s features - maybe people didn’t notice this very much? - but he nodded all the same. “Yeah, I’m originally from Canada. I moved here a couple years ago with my parents.”

Aha, that’s why Sunwoo recognized the accent! Holding up one finger to Hyungseo, Sunwoo called over his shoulder, “Jacob-hyung! Come here! There’s someone I want you to meet!”

The one in question finished wiping off his corner of the counter before joining Sunwoo by the straws. “Who is this?” he questioned, tilting his head politely toward Hyungseo.

Instead of replying directly, Sunwoo leaned in to Joonyoung’s ear and whispered, “Speak in English.”

“What?”

“Trust me, just do it.”

Joonyoung gave Sunwoo a weird look, but went for it anyway. “ _My friend here told me to speak to you in English? I’m hoping there’s a reason for that and he’s not playing a prank on me_.”

The more Joonyoung spoke, the more Hyungseo’s expression changed. It started with shock, then bewilderment, then acceptance, and finally, giddiness. A huge smile broke out over Hyungseo’s lips. 

_ “He’s not pranking you. I’m from Canada, so English is my first language.” _

_ “Wow, really? Same here! My friends in Korea call me Joonyoung, but my birth name is Jacob Bae.” _

_ “I’m known as Hyungseo here; my birth name is Kevin Moon, though. Can you believe it, my parents named me after Kevin from ‘Home Alone.’” _

_“Seriously? That’s hilarious! Dude, that is one of the greatest Christmas movies ever created_.”

Satisfied with his work, Sunwoo flitted away from them with a smug look and let them talk on their own. He understood a lot more English than people thought, so he didn’t want to intrude. He was just glad Joonyoung might have finally found another close friend. And Sunwoo had a sneaking suspicion, watching the two of them laugh, that they’d definitely be talking to each other more in the future.

“What have you done,” Juyeon wailed a second later. “We don’t need another Youngjae!”

“First of all, that’s so mean. Second of all, ignore them. It’s as simple as that.” Sunwoo gave Juyeon a sickeningly sweet smile and fluttered his eyelashes at the older boy.

He received an enormous eye-roll in return. 

Now he needed to go find Sangyeon.

His boss was found in the back room (his make-shift office) scribbling down information as usual. He looked tired, and for a split second Sunwoo felt bad about what he was going to ask. But concern for Chanhee won out.

“Hey, Sangyeon-hyung?”

The man lifted his head to glance at his red-headed worker. “Sunwoo-yah. What can I do for you?”

This would be hard to explain. It’d be even harder to convince Sangyeon to go along with him, even if he had just told Sunwoo he approved of him liking Chanhee. But Sunwoo had to do it.

Grabbing a chair and scooting it over to where Sangyeon sat after placing the goodies on the table, Sunwoo looked his boss dead in the eye and said, “I want you to take me to Chanhee’s apartment when we get off work.”

No surprise when Sangyeon immediately blurted out, “No. Seonoo, you know how I feel about doing stuff like that.”

“Please, hyung,” Sunwoo pleaded. “Chanhee-hyung is sick and I want to help him. As return for baking me some cupcakes.” 

Sangyeon released a long, tired sigh and leaned back in his chair to get a better view of Sunwoo. “I don’t know, Sun. You’ve only just met Chanhee, so I don’t know if he’d even want you there. Plus, he has two roommates who are fully capable of taking care of him.”

“You said to get to know him better, though.”

“Not by barging into his apartment five days after you met him. Normal people don’t do that.”

“But I’m not normal people,” Sunwoo argued. He really wanted to go and he wasn’t going to let Sangyeon stop him. “Besides, he said he wanted to see me here, so why wouldn’t he want to see me there? Especially if he seems to like my company?”

Sangyeon brushed a hand through his hair - a subtle sign that he was cracking. “There’s a big difference between meeting in a public place where you work, and meeting in a private place where he lives. What are you going to do if you walk in there, he doesn’t feel safe, and he never comes to see you again?”

That had Sunwoo quietly contemplating for a moment. “Then at least I’d know I have no chance with him.”

Logic, and a promise to Sangyeon that if Chanhee was bothered by Sunwoo’s visit, Sunwoo would never go again without permission. 

Sangyeon gave in with a weary sigh. “Listen, I’ll take you, but if something happens I’m not getting you out of there. Also, I want you to find your own ride back to your dorm.”

That was more than Sunwoo had expected. He eagerly grasped at the chance now hanging in front of him. “Fine! That’s fine! I’ll do that.”

“And work an extra hour as payment to me. I need the extra hands today.”

Dang it. But Sangyeon had a right to do that, as it was barely a payment for what he was letting Sunwoo do against his better judgment. 

“Okay. I’ll stay an extra hour - no pay, to make it even.”

“Deal.” Sangyeon watched as Sunwoo externally celebrated his victory by raising his fists in the air and screeching. A few customers, as well as Younghoon, could be heard asking what in the world was going on, while Joonyoung calmly explained it was just Sunwoo and everything was fine. Sangyeon couldn’t help but smile fondly at his youngest worker. “Get back to work, you little trickster. I’ll come get you when I’m ready to go.”

Sunwoo was going to see Chanhee!

——

Sunwoo wasn’t sure if it was humanly possible to burst a nerve from anxiety, but he knew he was about as close as a person could get. 

Sangyeon had just driven him to his apartment, and they were now climbing the stairs up to his room - and Chanhee’s. 

If ever Sunwoo had doubted a decision, it would be now. His discussion with Sangyeon was clear in the back of his head, and his mind kept running through the worst possible scenarios. 

What if Chanhee actually didn’t want him there? What if all contact between them was broken because Sunwoo made a stupid decision by moving too fast? What if - what if Chanhee said he never wanted to meet again? Ever? 

Sunwoo didn’t know if he’d be able to stand it if that happened.

But he was here now, and there was no going back. He had to follow through with his irrational plan.

“Be understanding, Sunwoo,” Sangyeon told him on the last flight of stairs. “If he wants you to leave, go without question. Don’t fight him, don’t play victim, and don’t stay more than five seconds after he says that. If he seems uncomfortable to you, leave with your best wishes. He’ll know then that you meant no harm.”

The bags of food curled in Sunwoo’s fingers slammed against his legs with every step he took. His arms were getting tired of carrying them. Well, just a few more seconds and they’d be off his hands. 

“I know, hyung,” he said to Sangyeon. “I promise I’ll do what he says.”

They stopped at Sangyeon’s door. The older man faced Sunwoo and smiled, a glint of fondness in his dark eyes. “Then go get him.” He pointed across the hall. “He’s right in there.” 

Sunwoo followed his finger. Stared at the door, then at Sangyeon, then at the door again. He finally settled for wrapping Sangyeon in a big hug. “Thank you, hyung. You’re the best.”

Sangyeon chuckled softly and gently patted Sunwoo’s hair. “Thanks, Sun. Now go check on him.”

Sangyeon unlocked his door and disappeared into his apartment with a final wave, leaving Sunwoo out in the hallway to deal with Chanhee alone. 

All the nervousness returned, stronger than ever, and Sunwoo almost backed out right then. 

But he didn’t.

Instead, he marched straight to the door across the hall, raised a fist, and rapped it sharply against the brown wooden door.

Immediately, voices could be heard through the cracks in the door. Someone was shuffling around in the apartment, gathering stuff up and setting it aside for the unexpected visitor. 

A few more seconds passed in which Sunwoo could hear footsteps growing nearer, then the door opened to reveal a surprised-looking Hyungseo. 

“Kim Sunwoo? What are you doing here?”

“Um . . .” Sunwoo froze for a split second, then snapped out of it and held up the bags in his hands. “I wanted to check on Chanhee-hyung. Bring him some soup and stuff in case he needed it.”

Something akin to suspicion fell over Hyungseo’s face. “Did he invite you?”

Whoops. Time to run. “Um, no, he didn’t.”

“Then how’d you know where we live?”

“He told me he lives right across from Sangyeon-hyung’s apartment. Sangyeon-hyung took me here after we got off work.”

“Hmm.” Hyungseo mouthed something to someone over his shoulder - probably Chanhee - and when he turned back around he had a smile on his lips. “I guess it’d be rude of us to deny you when you came all this way. And we never say no to free food.” 

Of course they’d wouldn’t. Did anyone turn down free food? Sunwoo was so grateful he’d decided to buy some groceries before he came.

Hyungseo stepped aside to allow Sunwoo into their apartment. It was cozy, dainty, if a room could be described that way. There was a small kitchen flush against the living room, a bathroom, and three bedrooms farther in the back. Very organized in some places, messier in others. Surprisingly clean for an apartment with three people.

“Chanhee’s in his room, second on the left. You can go see him while I get the food ready.”

“Where’s Hyunjae?” Sunwoo asked. He was curious to meet this mysterious third roommate of theirs.

Hyungseo grabbed the bags from Sunwoo’s hands and started placing the containers on the kitchen counter. “Bathroom. He doesn’t like having visitors when he’s not presentable, so I told him to hide until he’s ready to meet you.”

“Sounds like my friend Younghoon,” Sunwoo snorted.

“Younghoon - the barista that works with Jacob?”

Ahhhh. Sunwoo had almost forgotten about the meeting between Hyungseo and Joonyoung.

“Yep. How did your chat with Jacob-hyung go, by the way? Do you like him well enough?”

“Well enough? He’s practically my brother, dude. We grew up in Canada and both moved here around the same time. So much in common. It’s refreshing to be able to speak in English with someone again.”

“You should meet Jacob-hyung’s roommate then. He speaks English fluently.”

“Yeah, Jacob told me about Eric. He sounds a little wild, but I’m hoping to meet him soon.”

Sunwoo snorted. “Wild is one word for him.”

Hyungseo fixed Sunwoo with a friendly glare. “Just go see Chanhee, okay?”

“Fine, fine, I see how it is.” Sunwoo pranced away with tongue sticking out his mouth in Hyungseo’s general direction. “I’ll get out of your way.”

“Just wanted to let you know you’re almost as annoying as Hyunjae-hyung!” Hyungseo shouted as Sunwoo disappeared down the hallway to Chanhee’s room. There was an indignant squawk in reply to that that came from the vicinity of the bathroom. “Don’t blame me, you called for it, hyung!”

Time to get away from all the shouting and teasing. Sunwoo was here to see Chanhee.

The door was closed when he made it to Chanhee’s room, so he quickly knocked and waited for permission to enter.

All he received was a rough cough. 

That didn’t sound good.

Well, kill him if he made a mistake, but Chanhee clearly didn’t want to ruin his throat further by yelling for him to come in. So Sunwoo slowly pushed open the door and peaked his head inside.

There on a cozy bed piled with blankets and pillows sat Chanhee, reading a book in the dim light of his lamp. His cheeks were flushed red in the heat of fever, while the rest of his face was pale. He didn’t look that great. 

But that was why Sunwoo was here!

“Chanhee-hyung?” he called softly. He stepped inside the room and quietly clicked the door closed behind him. 

His eyes met Chanhee’s, who dropped the book in his sudden shock and started frantically running his hands through his pink hair. “Sunwoo-yah? What are you doing here?”

“Hyungseo-ssi told me you were sick, so I came to check on you,” he explained quietly. He noticed Chanhee wore a velvety pink pajama shirt and matching pajama pants. “I hope it’s not a bother. I can leave if you want.”

Holding himself to the promise he gave Sangyeon. If Chanhee didn’t want him here, he’d leave in a flash. 

Fortunately, to his immense relief and the thanks of his racing heart, Chanhee vehemently shook his head. “No, no, it’s fine. I just would’ve liked a warning so I could get ready.”

“Ready for what? Hyung, you’re sick!” Sunwoo tentatively sat on the end of Chanhee’s bed, by his feet. He didn’t know if he had permission to get any closer, as he’d never been this close in proximity to Chanhee before. “I don’t care what you look like. I care about you getting better.”

“That’s sweet of you.” Chanhee’s smile snapped when he broke into a fit of coughing. This had Sunwoo entirely forgetting his fears from a mere second ago, and led him to shoot to his feet and place a warm hand on Chanhee’s back. The coughs eased. “How long are you staying?”

Oh. Ah, Sunwoo hadn’t thought that far ahead. He probably should have planned this whole thing a little better. 

“Um, I don’t know,” he admitted. “I was going to boil you some soup and chat with you for a bit, but Hyungseo-ssi already took charge of making the soup.”

Chanhee rolled his eyes. “That’s going to end in disaster. Also, nobody really calls him Hyungseo. He prefers to be called by his birth name, Kevin.” 

“Kevin? Okay.”

Chanhee scooted over and patted the spot next to him on his bed as permission for Sunwoo to sit. Heart still a little out of whack, he did. Now he was so close he could feel the heat of Chanhee’s fever melting into him. 

“You wanna watch a movie tonight? My roommates and I normally have a movie night every Monday, and we don’t like cancelling for any reason. Plus, Kevin-hyung says he likes you already, so I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if you joined.”

Kevin already liked him? Since when had Sunwoo started making good impressions on people? First Chanhee, now his roommate?

It was unheard of.

What a streak. It’d probably break tomorrow.

“Uh, as long as Hyunjae-ssi is okay with it too, sure. I don’t want to overstay my welcome, though.”

“Sunwoo-yah, you’re always welcome here,” Chanhee said. A ghost of a finger brushed over Sunwoo’s hand, and he realized Chanhee had almost slipped up and laced their hands together. He wouldn’t have minded. “If Hyunjae-hyung has a problem with you, I’ll whack him.”

There were some strange people in this world, and Sunwoo hated that he was crushing on one. But of course, he was one too, so who was he to complain?

“All right, then,” he chuckled. “I’ll stay if you really want me to.”

“Cool!” The sudden outburst had Chanhee hacking his lungs out again, so Sunwoo began to rub circles into his back to ease the ache. “I keep forgetting I’m sick. It sucks.”

“I feel that. It’s even worse when you miss classes because of it.”

Chanhee groaned and fell back into his pillow with a  _fwoomp_!,  all his hair bouncing and fanning out around his head. He’d squashed Sunwoo’s hand in the process. “Don’t remind me. I had to do homework today even though I felt rotten.”

Petals of sympathy blossomed in Sunwoo’s heart at the pitiful whine edging Chanhee’s voice. Being sick while in school really did suck. 

“I’m sure you’ll feel better in no time,” he encouraged, smiling softly down at the boy beside him. Chanhee risked a short glance at him. “And I’m sure your teachers will have mercy on you.”

“They better darn hope they do, or I’m gonna whack them too.” Chanhee rolled over until his face was planted in the pillow, and Sunwoo’s arm had been freed. A smattering of muffled giggles suddenly erupted from the fluffy cushion. “I’m gonna whack everybody.”

Chanhee was certainly in a mood. Sunwoo was living for it. “Even me?”

Chanhee shot up from his position, eyes comically wide in horror. “No, not you! Never you!”

The pink-haired boy scrambled over to Sunwoo and without further ado, fell into his arms like a dead weight. Chanhee’s forehead now rested against Sunwoo’s chest, and his arms dangled limply against Sunwoo’s.

He was so warm. 

Suddenly Sunwoo was uncomfortable. “Hey, Chanhee-hyung? Maybe we should head out to the kitchen and wait for Kevin-ssi to finish making the soup.”

“Yep. Yep, okay. Let’s do that.”

To Sunwoo’s relief, Chanhee scrambled up from his bed and stumbled to the door like a drunken man. He nearly knocked his head against the door frame, but Sunwoo, who’d followed him, managed to catch him in time.

“Dude, if you’re always like this when you’re sick, I can see why Kevin-ssi wanted me to help you.”

Chanhee whipped around to glare absently at Sunwoo. “Was that an insult?”

“Just keep going, hyung. You’re almost there.”

The moment Sunwoo walked back into the kitchen, Hyungseo shot him an amused grin, followed by a wink. “I’m surprised you managed to get him out here so quickly. Usually it takes three hours to even get him to sit up.”

“That’s not true,” Chanhee whined. He hopped up on a stool by the kitchen island and patted the seat next to him for Sunwoo to sit on. “He’s just trying to embarrass me.”

“You’re good enough at embarrassing yourself, Chanhee-yah,” Hyungseo laughed.

He and Sunwoo shared a secret smirk.

“Can you just finish making my soup?” the boy with the pink hair asked. “I want to eat and watch a movie.”

“Fine, fine. Stop complaining and I’ll have it done in two minutes.”

Chanhee leaned over to Sunwoo and, in a manner of mystery, whispered, “Start counting. If he so much as goes a second over two minutes, let’s gang up on him.”

“Sorry, no can do,” Sunwoo said. “Kevin-ssi is way nicer than you are.”

Chanhee straightened his shoulders in feigned anger and cautiously slapped Sunwoo’s upper arm. He wore an expression that said he was absolutely done with his roommate and new friend ganging up on him.

Sunwoo had never had more fun teasing someone before.

Amidst the peals of laughter and the whining from Chanhee that filled the apartment, a new presence escaped from the bathroom. 

He had a unique face, handsome in a beautiful sort of way. Broad, high cheekbones, small forehead and lips, round eyes that glinted with laughter and a hint of mischief. Definitely a visual if Sunwoo had ever seen one.

“Hi, you must be Hyunjae?” he asked breathlessly, still a little high off amusement. He did his best to respectfully bow while balanced precariously on a stool.

Hyunjae returned the gesture. “I am. I wasn’t planning on coming out tonight, but you guys sounded like you were having so much fun I decided to join you.” 

“Trust me when I say he’ll fit right in with us,” Hyungseo promised. Sunwoo felt a blossom of warmth bloom in his chest at the compliment. “He’s even better at roasting than you are.”

Hyunjae eyed Sunwoo in suspicion. “We’ll have to see about that.” The blond-haired man made his way behind the counter to grab a glass of water and hand it to Chanhee. “Remember what the doc said about staying hydrated. You lose more water when you sweat.”

“What did the doctor say was wrong with him?” Sunwoo asked. He wanted to know so he could help Chanhee feel more comfortable tonight.

Hyunjae shrugged. “Just a severe cold. Well enough that he doesn’t need a strong medication, but bad enough that he shouldn’t be working.”

“As long as it’s not corona,” Sunwoo joked half-heartedly. He was honestly so thankful to be living in a country that knew what the heck they were doing when it came to a world-wide pandemic. Of course, having so many celebrities that were required to wear masks out in public probably helped keep their number of cases down.

America should take note.

“You want anything to drink?” Hyunjae questioned after a moment. He’d grabbed a teapot and set it on the stove to boil. “We’ve got water, tea, hot chocolate, and if you’re feeling risky, coffee.”

“What flavor tea is it?” Sunwoo inquired.

“We have green tea or lavender and chamomile.” 

“I’ll take the lavender and chamomile. Chanhee-hyung should have some too; I’ve heard it has healing properties.”

“Not a bad idea,” Hyungseo commented. He set two bowls down in front of Chanhee and Sunwoo, one full of broth and the other with kimchi stew. “Hyunjae-hyung, Chanhee, what are we going to watch tonight?”

“I vote horror,” Chanhee mumbled around a mouthful of soup.

Almost immediately, and in perfect synchronization, both Hyunjae and Sunwoo shouted, “No!”

Hyungseo raised his eyebrows at Sunwoo. “I knew Hyunjae-hyung was a scaredy-cat, but I didn’t know you were. Chanhee keeps telling me you seem confident about everything.”

“I did not!”

Sunwoo glanced briefly at Chanhee, then at Hyungseo. “I’m flattered, but I’m actually scared of quite a few things. Horror movies and heights being the main two. I also startle easily, but if you take advantage of that information I will personally see to it that your life gets ruined.”

“Oh my gosh, you really are another Hyunjae-hyung,” Hyungseo chortled. He and Hyunjae had moved around the counter to open the doors of their TV and search through their watch list for a movie. “He’s also terrified of heights.”

“Really?” Sunwoo swung off the chair, kimchi stew in hand, and plopped heavily on one end of the couch. Chanhee followed suit, except he sat on the other end of the couch. “I don’t understand how people can’t  not  be scared of heights. Like, seriously, does the thought not cross your mind that if you made one little mistake, you’d be falling and  splat!,  you’re dead!”

“Or permanently maimed, or injured, or psychologically traumatized,” Hyunjae added in a dramatically hushed voice. He and Sunwoo had their gazes locked. “Heights in general are just an accident waiting to happen.”

“Thank you! That’s precisely what I try to tell people, but they’re all like, ‘Psh, that’s what railings are for! If you’re that scared, don’t look over the edge!’”

“I know,” Hyunjae breathed. “But what happens when the railing breaks and you’re plunged to your doom? And I  would  step away from the edge, but as much as heights scare me, there’s also a lot of beauty to seeing the world from up high.”

“Yes!” Sunwoo clenched his hands into fists and raised his eyes to the heavens. “Finally, someone understands me!”

Their conversation ended when Hyungseo cleared his throat and said, “When you guys are done with your bonding session, can we please start the movie?”

“No,” Hyunjae snapped, then chortled at the expressions on Chanhee’s and Hyungseo’s faces. 

“My god,” Chanhee sighed, plopping his spoon in his broth. “You two really are exactly alike.”

If that really were true, Hyunjae and Sunwoo might as well make the most of it. As Hyungseo started the movie (some superhero show that Changmin had forced Sunwoo to watch at least ten times already), Hyunjae leaned over the armrest of his recliner and exchanged a subtle high five with his new red-headed friend.

Yeah, Hyungseo had been right. Sunwoo would have no trouble at all fitting in here. 


	3. Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunwoo experiences one of the worst days of his life - but when Chanhee comes to make everything better, Sunwoo knows it’ll be all right.

Several hours and three movies later, Sunwoo found himself drifting off on Chanhee’s couch. He hadn’t meant to stay this long, nor had he meant to lose track of time, but here he was nodding off while the fourth movie finished up.

Hyungseo had long since disappeared into his room to sleep, and Chanhee had drifted off about an hour ago. He sat across from Sunwoo on the couch, chin against his chest and pink bangs gathered in his eyes as he breathed softly in the throes of dreaming.

He was cute, beautiful, even, but Sunwoo didn’t have time to admire him as he was fighting off sleep of his own. 

Hyunjae was the only one left wide awake, and his eyes were still glued to the movie he’d chosen to watch (Spider-Man: Far From Home). He’d almost forgotten Sunwoo didn’t live with them in his distraction. But when the movie finally ended and he shut off the TV at four in the morning, he slipped a glance at the couch and smiled.

Sunwoo was now sleeping with his head tilted back and his mouth wide open. He didn’t snore, thank goodness, but it was kind of comical. 

He found Sunwoo pretty in a rugged sort of way, as he was cute but wouldn’t be considered a visual by Korean standards.

But honestly, Hyunjae didn’t care about looks. He’d found a companion soul in Sunwoo, and they’d spent much of the night chatting about common interests they had, such as dancing and music. He’d learned Sunwoo wanted to go into rapping, and told his new friend that he himself wanted to become a singer, and that both Chanhee and Hyungseo did as well.

The brunt of their time, however, had been spent teasing Hyungseo and Chanhee at every opportunity. They definitely shared a bond there, and eventually things turned into an all-out diss war between them. Much to Hyunjae’s chagrin, Sunwoo had won.

That kid could really spit fire if he put his mind to it.

But Hyunjae liked him. A lot. And now that he’d finally met this guy Chanhee had been going on and on and on about for the past week, he felt better. He highly approved of any steps the two boys took in their relationship.

He also knew without asking that Hyungseo did too.

Well, he needed to get to bed. Hyunjae cleared off the table as quietly as he could, throwing the dishes in the sink to clean tomorrow (or rather, later this morning). He headed for Chanhee, picked his younger roommate up, and carried him back to his room where he gently tucked the boy into bed. 

That soft face looked so peaceful in the healing of sleep. Hyunjae knew part of that was because Sunwoo had come. 

And, much to Hyunjae’s surprise and delight, Chanhee’s fever had fallen significantly. It was probably all thanks to the medicine and the careful attention Sunwoo had given to the older boy, but Hyunjae still felt relieved. He hated seeing Chanhee sick.

Finally, he had one last thing to do. Stopping by his closet on the way, Hyunjae headed back to the living room and hesitantly stopped in front of the sleeping Sunwoo.

He didn’t know if Sunwoo had somewhere he needed to be soon, or if the boy had the morning shift at work or something important like that. He wouldn’t want to get Sunwoo in trouble. 

But in the end, after seeing the large purple bags under Sunwoo’s eyes and hearing his gentle breathing blowing into the air, he decided to let Sunwoo stay the night (or what was left of it).

Besides, Sunwoo could clearly use the rest, and a day off from university. 

And Hyunjae could always ask Sangyeon when he got up if Sunwoo had a shift today. Problem solved.

Satisfied, Hyunjae carefully shifted Sunwoo until he was more comfortably curled up on the couch. Then he placed a pillow from his room under the boy’s head and draped the blanket over his small frame.

Now to sleep his own tiredness away.

——

Sunwoo nearly had a heart attack when he woke up to unfamiliar surroundings. The TV to his left definitely was not his, he was not in his bed, and Changmin never made breakfast.

There were two quiet voices whispering to each other in the kitchen when reality caught up with Sunwoo.

He vaguely remembered falling asleep right around the time Peter Parker discovered the bad guy’s hologram trick, and had hazy memories of half-waking up a few times, but nothing more.

So he must have accidentally stayed the night at Chanhee’s apartment.

And from the whispering behind him, Sunwoo could safely assume Hyunjae and Hyungseo had been perfectly fine with letting him stay. Otherwise, they would have kicked him out long ago.

Stretching his arms out and releasing a yawn, Sunwoo slowly sat up and ruffled a hand through his messy bed hair. A blanket fell off his shoulders to puddle around his waist. Courtesy of Hyunjae, he assumed. 

“Morning, sleepyhead!” he heard Hyungseo call from the kitchen.

He could only nod in response and stare dazedly off into the distance. He zoned out for a good ten minutes when he woke up every morning. Yeah, he was a slow riser.

But he had a spotty sleep schedule, so really, he couldn’t blame himself.

Stupid college classes.

And just like that, he remembered.

“Oh, no, oh no, ohno,” he gasped, jumping up off the couch and throwing the blanket to the ground in his haste. He scrambled for his phone to check the time. Dead. “Crap! I’m so dead.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Sunwoo,” Hyungseo murmured calmingly. In his panic, Sunwoo didn’t notice that Hyungseo had dropped formalities with him. “What’s wrong? What’s going on?”

He probably looked strange standing there in the middle of the room, hair a tangled mess, clothes old from yesterday, eyes wide and pupils dilated. He didn’t have the heart to care, though, when something much more important was on his mind.

“What time is it?” he asked Hyungseo, shooting out from behind the couch and waving frantically at his new friend. “Tell me, tell me now! Please!”

“Sure, yeah, just give me a second,” Hyungseo nodded. He looked worried as he grabbed his own phone and clicked the power button. “It’s five minutes till nine.”

“Crap!”

Sunwoo was so dead.

The rapper dropped to the floor of the apartment, cradling his head in his hands and rocking back and forth. He couldn’t believe this. He shouldn’t have asked Sangyeon to take him. Sangyeon should’ve said no like he did every other time. Why didn’t he say no?

A presence knelt by Sunwoo and placed a tentative hand on his shoulder. “Hey, Sunwoo-yah, do you want to tell us what’s wrong?” Hyungseo asked. His voice held the utmost kindness and gentleness. “Hyunjae-hyung and I don’t know you well, but we’re here if you need to talk.”

“I missed my classes,” Sunwoo managed to blurt out past his hands, albeit a little muffled. “I have an eight o’clock and a nine o’clock on Tuesdays, and I’m going to miss them both. My parents are going to kill me. I can’t afford to miss class.”

There was silence for a stretch, then Hyunjae muttered out, “Um, Sunwoo-yah, maybe . . . maybe that’s for the best? You looked really worn out and overworked last night, so maybe it’s good that you’re getting a little extra rest.”

Heart frantically beating in his chest, Sunwoo lifted his head to glare daggers at Hyunjae. “You don’t understand. I’m paying for my own tuition. I have a limited number of absences. I’m barely making ends meet. I’m so freaking tired and frustrated at everything and everyone, but I can’t do anything about it because this is what my parents expect of me. Any less, and they won’t let me to talk to my sister anymore on the grounds that she’s making me get distracted.”

A longer silence hooded the room this time. Hyungseo still had his hand on Sunwoo’s shoulder, and now moved it to comfortingly rub circles over the younger boy’s shoulder blades. 

“Listen, Sunwoo-yah,” he began softly, “you’ve already missed your classes so there’s no use stressing about them. You’re given absences for a reason, and you still have more left. Your life isn’t over. I’m sure if you talked to Sangyeon-hyung about your financial situation as well, he’d understand and be willing to help you out. He gives some of his other college employees paid days off because he doesn’t want them running into the ground to get an education. He’s a very understanding man, and I know he’d help you out since he highly values you.”

Could Hyungseo be right? Was Sunwoo just overreacting? Maybe he could afford to take a day or two off every once in a while, to get his bearings back and to catch up on sleep. Maybe he could talk to his teachers about his situation, too, and they’d work with him on his homework and class schedule. 

Maybe he was just overreacting because that’s what his parents always did. 

Even so, he needed to get back to his dorm and catch up on the homework he was supposed to do last night. That, and seeing as his phone was dead, he’d probably have more than a few people worried about his absence.

Namely his roommate and best friend.

“Maybe you’re right,” he mumbled. “But I still need to go. Eric and Changmin-hyung are probably freaking out right now.”

“That’s more like it,” Hyungseo smiled. He gave Sunwoo’s shoulder a gentle supportive squeeze, and Sunwoo accepted it with a small nod. 

He’d have to thank them later for letting him sleep over at their apartment. He hadn’t even asked.

Once he’d gathered his small array of belongings, he reached for the door and made to leave. “Thank you for the enjoyable time, and for letting me sleep here,” he said before he left. “I hope I wasn’t intruding, and I hope I can visit you all again sometime. Please give my best to Chanhee-hyung. Tell him I hope he feels better.”

He didn’t wait for a reply before he closed the door behind him.

Thirty-seven minutes later, Sunwoo finally made it back to his dorm room. The instant he pushed the door open, four heads whipped around to stare at him.

Changmin practically leaped out of his chair and bolted for his roommate, latching onto Sunwoo’s neck and squeezing as tightly as humanly possible.

“Where were you?” he asked with a shaky voice. “You were gone all night, and you never returned any of my texts or calls. Not even Juyeon-hyung or Joonyoung-hyung knew where you were, and they always know where you are!”

When Changmin pulled away, Sunwoo could see Youngjae sitting on their couch, along with their mutual friends Bomin and Sanha.

He felt bad that he’d made them worry.

“Look, I’m sorry, guys,” he began. His voice dripped with exhaustion as he found the recliner and sunk into it. Despite the five hours he’d gotten last night, he still wanted nothing more than to sleep. “I went to Chanhee-hyung’s apartment to check on him because he was sick. I unexpectedly fell asleep and stayed the night. My phone died so I couldn’t contact you.”

“You-“ Youngjae began, then cut off. He seemed to be digesting the information. “You slept at Chanhee’s apartment?”

The implication in his tone was clear, and all that frustration and panic from earlier slammed into Sunwoo full-force. How could his friends even begin to think he’d do something like that? 

“No, Youngjae, oh my god. I didn’t sleep  _with_ him. You know I would never do that, and besides, he has two roommates. Sheesh. I just, I didn’t think, his roommates liked me and wanted me to stay, so I did, and I lost track of time, and, and, and-“ He stopped to release a cry of frustration and furiously scrubbed his hands through his hair. “I screwed up, okay? I screwed up. I missed my classes and I didn’t do my homework and I’m in so much trouble I don’t know what to do with myself. I want to be alone, okay? Please. Go away and leave me alone.”

Though worry etched his friends’ faces, they seemed to understand that he desperately needed some space and that he wouldn’t talk to them until he got that space.

Youngjae was the first to move, as he quickly stood and grabbed both Bomin and Sanha by the arm. As he towed them out the door, he paused to give Sunwoo a gentle look over his shoulder.

“Call us if you need anything,” he murmured, and left Sunwoo alone with Changmin.

There was a brief moment of silence while Changmin discerned whether or not he should say anything to Sunwoo. His roommate had his days, when he needed to be alone to recharge or gather his thoughts. Days when he knew if he talked to someone, he’d snap and say something he’d regret.

Then there were days when he said he wanted to be alone, but it was a silent plea for help. Those days, he’d wait for someone to ask him if he was okay, and he’d spill his guts till he felt better. 

Changmin just had to determine if today was a silent plea to talk, or a day when Sunwoo genuinely wanted to be alone. 

It didn’t take him long to determine that he should go; generally, when Sunwoo refused eye contact, it meant he really wanted time to himself.

So Changmin slowly made his way over to where Sunwoo rested his head in his hands, gently patted his roommate’s back, and grabbed his backpack. “Remember, I’ll be leaving after classes today,” he said quietly. Sunwoo hummed in acknowledgment. “I’ll be back on Thursday morning at the earliest. Let me know if there’s anything you need while I’m away.”

“Okay. Thanks, hyung.”

Changmin gave Sunwoo one last pat, then, like Youngjae, he too disappeared through the door. 

That left Sunwoo alone. For about ten minutes, he let himself wind down and soothe his frustration away by curling up on the recliner and thinking about what had happened. Afterwards, he scrambled to complete his homework from last night and shove it into his backpack.

He needed to talk to his teachers and tell them what had happened. Hopefully they’d be understanding and work with him.

If not . . . well, he’d have to find some way to deal with it. 

Sunwoo double-checked to make sure he had everything he needed in his backpack before exiting his dorm and heading for the music building on campus. He knew at least one of his teachers he needed to talk to would be there. 

He was right.

His Lyric-Writing teacher was at her office when he came searching for her, and though he was nervous about talking to her (he was a good student - hardly ever needed the teachers for anything other than lectures and therefore never really interacted with them personally), he knew it needed to be done.

“Excuse me, Mrs. Min?” he asked politely. 

His teacher, a petite lady of about thirty-five, paused in her typing to greet him with a smile. All of Sunwoo’s fears instantly flew out the window. 

“Yes? It’s Sunwoo, isn’t it?” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

Mrs. Min pulled a chair out from beside her and motioned for Sunwoo to sit down. Oh, okay. He hadn’t been expecting that, but again, it only made him feel more comfortable around her. She was going to take the time to listen to him no matter how long it took. 

“What can I help you with?” she questioned once Sunwoo had made himself comfortable. “I noticed this was the first time you haven’t been in class this entire semester, so I was rather worried about you. Is everything okay?”

Giving him the opportunity to explain while at the same time assuring him she’d noticed his absence and was concerned for him. If she was this good of a teacher, maybe Sunwoo should get to know her better.

“I had a friend last night I went to see,” Sunwoo began softly. “He was sick yesterday, and I wanted to help, so I went to his apartment and got him dinner and medication, and watched a couple movies with him. I lost track of time and ended up falling asleep. By the time I woke up, it was already almost nine and I was too far away from campus to make it to your class on time.” He paused, gauging her reaction. Mrs. Min’s eyes were bright and fixated on him with her undivided attention. “I apologize for being late, and for not setting an alarm. It won’t happen again.”

By the time he finished, Mrs. Min had leaned back in her chair and was tapping her fingers against her chin in concentration. Sunwoo didn’t know what to think of that. 

“Let me guess,” she said after a moment, “you weren’t able to get your homework done last night?”

Oh no, here came the fun part. Sunwoo had to tell her he hadn’t done the assignment until ten minutes ago and needed her to take ten percent off his grade, as was the school policy. 

Ashamed, he lowered his head and muttered, “No, ma’am, I didn’t. I finished it a couple minutes ago so I have it here if you want it, but I understand you have to subtract ten percent from my grade because it’s late.”

“Sunwoo-yah,” she said, and Sunwoo looked into her sympathetic eyes, “I hope this does happen again.”

Wait, what? How could she say that? Did she had a grudge against him or something, and she didn’t want to see him succeed? He was one of her best students! He hadn’t missed a single day, his assignments were always turned in on time, and he always did well on the projects and tests! What was her problem?

He was about to get up and head to her boss right then and there for causing student failure, but her soft hand guiding him back into his seat stopped him. He stared at her incredulously.

“I hope it happens again,” she repeated, “because then I’ll know that you’re getting the rest you need. I’m willing to work with you in just about any situation, but I have to know what your situation is first. I can’t give you points back until I have the whole picture. So talk to me. What’s going on? What can I do to help you with your work load?”

Did she know about his life outside the class? Or did she just read people well? Perhaps she assumed that there had to be something more going on because he was practically the perfect student, and perfect students didn’t have absences or late work unless something was wrong.

“How do you know so much about me?” he finally settled with. 

“I don’t,” she reassured, and Sunwoo believed her. “It’s just, as a mother with three kids, I’m worried about you. You always look so tired when you come to class, and you’re getting worse and worse every time you come in. I can see the bags under your eyes from the back of the classroom. Since you’ve never been late before, and I know you make good grades, it’s natural for me to assume that I’m missing part of the story. But I can’t help make things easier for you unless you’re willing to tell me what’s going on in your life outside my classroom.”

She had a point. And she was observant, especially for someone he’d never talked to one-on-one before. He’d emailed her a couple times, sure. Texted her once or twice when he was in a hurry. But never met face-to-face like this. 

She was so nice he was beginning to regret not meeting her in person before this.

He felt he could trust her.

“My parents are making me pay my own tuition,” he began, getting comfortable. He saw a flash of surprise cross Mrs. Min’s face, as if she hadn’t been expecting him to open up. But really, who else did he have to talk to than someone who had experience? “Because of that, I work every day of the week except Sunday. It’s really hard to balance classes, homework, and my job and still get everything done. My last class on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday ends at four. I work from five until midnight, then stay up and do my homework. Tuesday and Thursday, my last class ends at three and I work from four to eleven and then do homework. Saturdays I work a full eight hour shift, so the only day I have to catch up on homework is Sunday.”

He noticed Mrs. Min hanging on to his every word and nodding along to show she was listening. This only spurred Sunwoo to keep going. 

“My parents expect me to get all A’s, pay my tuition, and do my job with no breaks. They think missing class or turning an assignment in late is a sin, even if I’m sick. They say if any of my grades drop below 90 percent, they’ll cut off all contact with my sister and claim it’s because she’s a distraction for me. I love my sister, Mrs. Min, and I would do anything to be able to stay in contact with her. Even if it kills me.”

He paused, took a breath to show he wasn’t quite finished. He was already feeling so much better by getting this off his chest. 

“Then there’s my ex-boyfriend. He recently showed up - as in last Thursday - and officially told me that he’d ended our relationship because he’d found someone better in his band. We were meant to debut together, and we were lovers for four years. He just threw all of that down the train and didn’t tell me why for a whole year. Now he finally told me, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel.

“On top of all that, I think I might have found somebody new I might be interested in. I met him before this whole fiasco with my ex happened, but my feelings only started developing after my ex talked to me on Thursday. I’m so confused now, because I can’t tell if I like this new guy because it makes me forget about my ex, or if I genuinely do like him. I think I do. I really like being around him. It’s just so hard to tell.”

He came to a close, and Mrs. Min looked him deep in the eyes to hold his attention on her. He knew he’d listen to whatever she had to say; he just hoped it was advice he could follow, or he’d be trapped in a box with no air to breathe. He’d suffocate sooner or later at this rate, he knew it. 

“When it comes to your parents, Sunwoo,” Mrs. Min said seriously, “there’s only one thing to do. Stop letting them dictate your life. They can’t tell you what to do or how to run your life anymore. You’re twenty-one years old, for goodness sake!” (A/N - Sunwoo is twenty-one in Korea, twenty by American standards.)

He already knew that! Of course he did! How many times had he and his friends told himself this? He’d even had this conversation with his parents, but it had amounted to virtually nothing.

“But my sister,” he murmured, clasping his shaking hands together and resting them on his knees. “They can still dictate her.”

Mrs. Min seemed to consider this. “How often do you talk to her?”

Oh. He saw where this was going. “Once a month or so.”

“So you already only talk to her four times a semester,” the teacher said. “If your parents ban you from talking to her, nothing much is really changing, is it?”

He had to admit the truth. “No, it isn’t.”

“Then why take them so seriously?” Mrs. Min asked softly. “They should understand how busy you are, and that it’s nearly impossible to have perfect attendance. People get sick, they shouldn’t be around others. They should get rest. If your parents are telling you otherwise, they would be the ones at fault, not you.

“I would suggest talking to your parents again, especially if you’re this tired, and tell them how you’re feeling. Tell them you’re doing your best and you have amazing grades, and you’re keeping up with tuition, but you don’t think you can do all of that without some sort of break.

“If they listen to you, great! If they don’t, then be brave and tell them that if they won’t take care of you, you’ll take care of yourself. Even if it means missing a day of class or letting your grades slip a little. Because at the end of the day, what will you accomplish when you’re so tired you can’t work? Grades will do nothing for you then.

“I mean, there’s nothing else they can really take from you at this point. They can’t threaten to stop paying your tuition. They can’t threaten to take your job. They can’t even threaten to take your sister from you because they already have. So really, what else have you to lose from them?”

She was right, no matter how much Sunwoo wanted to deny it. He would’ve replied that he could lose their love, but really, if they were treating him like this, he seriously doubted he even had their love in the first place. He could lose them - but ultimately, was it better for him to obey their unreasonable demands and stress himself out to the point he ended up in the hospital, or deny their toxicity and live more happily because he had his health back?

Yeah, it was a hard decision. But he knew what he should do.

“As for your ex-boyfriend,” Mrs. Min continued, “well, simply ask yourself this: do you like this new guy because of your ex’s rejection, or do you like him despite your ex’s rejection? If you like him because of your ex’s rejection, your feelings for him are fake. If you like him despite your ex’s rejection, then your feelings for him are real. It’ll take time to determine which one it is, but you’ll figure it out soon enough.

“And don’t worry about this new guy dumping you the way your ex-boyfriend did. There’s always a possibility you’ll break up with someone you’re interested in, but if it does happen, you’ll just have to assume it’s because they weren’t right for you. It’s not because you can’t be loved; it’s just that there’s someone out there who can love you more than any of your past exes ever did. 

“Take time to get over your ex, of course, because if you don’t those feelings will be bottled up until they shatter and you take them out on someone innocent. Once you feel like you’re doing better, then pursue this new man and cherish him for the time you have him, whether it be for a day or for a lifetime.”

This lady was good. She was really good at giving advice. It was like she could read Sunwoo’s mind and she knew what he needed to hear before he even asked. Maybe she’d helped other students before, and maybe she’d experienced this herself.

Whatever the case, Sunwoo knew she was right on all accounts, and he could safely follow her advice in all areas. If he had any questions, he could always come right back here and ask her for help again. 

Sunwoo had found the ally he desperately needed.

“Thank you, Mrs. Min,” he breathed after a long lull. His heart felt so much lighter than it had before he walked in here. “I’ll keep all that in mind and see what I can do about it.”

“That’s all I ask,” she smiled. “As for your homework, Sunwoo-yah, you said you have it with you?”

“Oh, yes ma’am.” Sunwoo unzipped his backpack and shuffled around for his folders until he found the correct one. He found his Lyric Writing homework inside. “Here you go.”

“Thank you,” his teacher said. “I wanted to let you know that we actually moved this assignment to Thursday because most of the class didn’t do it. Thursday’s homework is now due next Tuesday. Since you’ve handed this in today, I’ll go ahead and give you full marks, and you won’t have to worry about homework for another week.”

Wow. Sunwoo was utterly convinced that Mrs. Min was an angel in disguise. He stood and bowed three, four times to show his utmost appreciation for her. “Thank you, thank you so much, Mrs. Min. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

“I’d also like you to take Thursday off of class,” Mrs. Min added, and Sunwoo’s heart leapt for joy, “and I won’t count you absent. We’ll be going over and exchanging this homework on Thursday, and since you’re a good lyricist I don’t see the need for you to be there when you could use the rest more. Use the hour off to take a nap.”

Sunwoo couldn’t believe this! How could someone so perfect exist?

“Is-is that allowed? Me being absent but you not marking me?”

After all, if she was doing all of this for him, he didn’t want to get her in trouble. 

“Policy rules state that teachers must follow guidelines unless they feel there is a very good exception,” Mrs. Min explained. “Plus, it’s my class, so as long as this doesn’t happen all the time, I’m allowed to make exceptions when I want to. I’m making one for you now. Take it and don’t worry about me getting in trouble - I won’t.”

Well, if she was positive. Sunwoo didn’t know when he’d ever get a free pass from class again, much less from her if exceptions truly were that rare. He might just want to take this now.

“Okay,” he smiled, and grabbed his backpack as he made for the door. It felt as if the weight of the world had fallen from his shoulders in the span of twenty minutes. “Thank you again, Mrs. Min, I don’t know how I’ll make this up to you.”

“All I ask in return is that you keep doing well,” Mrs. Min promised. “And Sunwoo-yah?” The red-head paused at the door to hear what she wanted to say. “Get some rest.”

With a final bow and a promise to do his best, Sunwoo disappeared down the hall to meet his second teacher. He doubted his second meeting would go as well as this one had, but he didn’t mind because Mrs. Min had made his day. 

She was an angel sent from heaven.

Sunwoo’s second teacher, a Mr. Xu, was known to be the toughest grader in the division, and an even stricter person. 

Things weren’t expected to go very well with this guy, but Sunwoo could at least reassure himself that Mr. Xu would follow the policy guidelines. If he didn’t, Sunwoo could complain. 

He found Mr. Xu still in the classroom where they had class every Tuesday and Thursday, and he knocked politely on the door to announce his presence.

Mr. Xu stopped what he was doing.

“Ah, Sunwoo! What can I do for you?”

As with Mrs. Min, Sunwoo quickly explained his situation from the night before and how he had been unable to complete his homework. He handed Mr. Xu the newly finished homework and asked for any possible grace, explaining he had never missed class and never submitted an assignment late before. He hoped Mr. Xu would understand, but doubt he’d get any leeway. 

He was right.

“I’m sorry, Sunwoo, but since you turned this in late due to irresponsibility, I’m afraid I can’t make an exception for you.”

Okay, valid, although Sunwoo would argue that being killed by sleep deprivation was also valid. His teacher probably didn’t understand how much Sunwoo was struggling to sleep due to his current circumstances. 

People didn’t concentrate when they didn’t sleep.

“I understand, sir. Thank you for listening.”

Sunwoo turned around and walked dejectedly back out the door, ready to go cry about getting a stupid B on his paper and wallow in misery and ice cream the rest of the day, when he heard a heavy sigh behind him. 

“Sunwoo, wait.” He turned back to see Mr. Xu skimming over his project. “Normally, I wouldn’t do this, but seeing as you are a good student and I know you’re struggling to make ends meet, I’ll let this slide. Plus, this is only about two hours late, and the fact that you completed it so soon after accidentally falling asleep tells me you tried to put effort into it. I’ll give you full credit.”

What did you know, miracles could happen. 

Even the strict teacher had a soft spot for good students.

Sunwoo couldn’t help but bow and let out a string of thank you’s that he was sure annoyed the teacher. However, when he raised himself up again, he thought he saw the smallest of smiles on Mr. Xu’s lips.

Maybe today wouldn’t be so bad after all.

——

He was wrong.

He was so wrong.

Aside from the kind teachers, today couldn’t have been worse. 

He’d missed lunch so he could complete his homework for his two afternoon classes on time. He’d still ended up late to his one o’clock, forgotten to bring snacks to eat before his two o’clock. At three when he finally finished his school day, he thought he’d have his sweet release from bad run-ins.

Unfortunately not.

Sunwoo nearly got mugged on his way to work. He was walking across the street to Sangyeon’s café when someone grabbed him and shoved him into an alleyway. Thankfully, Sunwoo worked out everyday and was a lot stronger than he looked, so he managed to fight the perpetrator off with only a few scratches and bruises on his part.

And though he was shaking for a while afterwards, his friends at work were understanding and gave him a few minutes to wind down. Sangyeon even patched up his knuckles from when he punched the bad guy in the ribs. 

Sunwoo was hoping that would be the end of his unfortunate situations, as work was generally a pretty peaceful, quiet atmosphere. And sure, he might not like his work to a degree, but at least he felt comfortable and safe there.

But even there, things kept going wrong. It was like fate had it out for him today. 

He’d mixed up three orders. Spilled about half a dozen drinks. Coated his apron and arms in a layer of syrup when a bottle had burst. Dropped a piece of cake. And worst of all, bumped into Joonyoung so hard coming around the corner from the back room his friend had fallen and sprained his wrist.

He just generally felt horrible and ready to lash out at any moment.

It didn’t help that with Joonyoung unable to make drinks now, all the complaints were laid on Sunwoo for incorrectly concocting a drink. Once or twice it wasn’t even his fault - Juyeon or Younghoon had put down the wrong drink.

But did the customers care?

Nope, they just took it out on the person who made the drink, because clearly he’d done it on purpose. He just had that type of face. And personality. And aura.

Like they even knew him.

He was dealing with one of those customers now, a furious mother of three getting in his face and pointing at him over the counter. Sunwoo was crushing a towel in his hands to keep himself from yelling orswatting at her in his own seething rage.

The only difference between him and this lady was that he could keep his anger at bay. She couldn’t.

“I asked for extra caramel in my frappe! Extra caramel, and what did you do? Give me less!”

She was shouting, her voice carrying through the entire café in careless anger. Her hair was gathering in her face and whipping her cheeks every time she jerked a finger into Sunwoo’s chest.

Honestly, her hair was probably making her angrier than Sunwoo was.

“How am I supposed to function at work if I don’t have the right coffee?! How do you expect me to care for my kids if I have to keep coming back here and wasting my time because YOU keep messing my order up?!” she shrieked.

Sunwoo just twisted the towel in his hand tighter, eyes locked on hers. “Ma’am, we’re not wasting your time here. You are. And I highly doubt that it’s the coffee that’s causing all your problems if you can’t cope without it.”

The woman’s eyes widened and her jaw slacked open when she realized that a worker, an employee of this company, had just  dared  to talk back to her.

Now she was even more furious.

“I can’t believe this! You should be fired! A place as nice as this shouldn’t have workers as mean as you! Especially when you mess up my drink!” 

The lady’s eyes were wild, and for a fraction of a second Sunwoo was worried about what she might do. He needed to get her out of here.

“Ma’am, listen, I can remake your drink for you no problem if you calm down and let me apologize,” he said, growing weary. Why were people so stupid? More importantly, why were they mean for no good reason?

Like this lady, who was still having none of it. 

“Apologize? Apologize?! Oh, you are way past apologizing, young man! You should get out of here before I fire you for incompetence!” 

Sunwoo almost wanted to laugh at her. But he didn’t. He wanted her out of here, now. “Ma’am, either let me remake your drink, or get out of here. Those are the only options I’m giving you.”

The woman did not like that. She wanted her own option followed, and she expected it to be done no matter what the cost. She leaned over the counter and grabbed Sunwoo’s collar in her fists.

Okay, he might need to get the police in here soon.

“Listen here, you little twerp,” she hissed, spit flying out between her lips, “you get your manager and I’ll show you what it’s like to be out of a job.”

He stared her square in the eyes, unintimidated. “Good luck trying,” he scoffed, and firmly wrenched her hands off his shirt. “Sangyeon-hyung! This lady wants to talk to you!”

Sunwoo wished he could walk away and never bother with her again, but he knew he couldn’t leave her to her own devices. It’d be his fault if he walked away now and the woman did something to one of his coworkers or, heavens forbid, one of the other customers.

Fortunately, Sangyeon didn’t take long to arrive. “You asked for me?” he inquired, looking to Sunwoo for an answer, but the woman started speaking before Sunwoo could get a word in edge-wise. 

“Sir, this young man here has been treating me very rudely and refusing to help me,” she spat. “He swore at me and told me he was never going to serve me again!”

What in the world? How could this lady say that when it wasn’t true? Were some really so desperate to always get what they wanted that they’d lie and ruin someone’s reputation to get it? And she was willing to ruin Sunwoo’s reputation for what - a coffee?

Good grief.

People were stupid.

Sunwoo was about to barge in and tell Sangyeon what had really happened when he felt a soft hand fall on his arm beneath the counter and squeeze reassurance. Sangyeon must already know that it wasn’t Sunwoo’s fault.

“Ma’am,” Sangyeon began, “I was standing over there listening to your entire conversation, and I know you’re lying to me. My worker here offered to help you multiple times, even offered to remake your drink for free, and kindly withstood your false accusations. I’m inclined to think that if he swore at you and said he would never serve you again, which he didn’t, he had a very valid reason for doing so. Now I’ll kindly ask you to either let us remake your drink or leave before I call the cops on you.”

The woman’s expression was priceless. She looked like a beached whale gasping for air with the amount of times she opened and closed her mouth, the anger and smugness on her face momentarily being replaced with bewilderment.

Then she set her expression to stone. 

“Fine then. I’m giving this store a one star and never coming back. Your service is horrible. Enjoy the bad rating, bastards,” she quipped, and without further ado, grabbed her old, melted caramel frappe, pulled off the dome lid, and threw it all over Sunwoo.

The golden liquid sloshed onto his brown apron, soaked into his arms, dripped down his chin and elbows onto the floor and counter below. Several chunks of half-melted ice flew down his collar into his shirt, freezing cold against the bare skin of his stomach and chest. 

Some of it even splashed on his face and stuck in his hair, to the point he had to close his eyes because of the rivulets of melting caramel that dribbled into the crevices of his eyes. 

Sunwoo wanted to cry, or scream, or punch someone. He nearly pleaded for the mugger to come back so he could taste the satisfaction of sinking his knuckles into solid skin and bone. 

Yet somehow, by some miraculous gift of infinite patience, Sunwoo managed to hold his anger back and refrain from slapping the woman. He stood in place as Sangyeon escorted her outside by the arm, didn’t move until his frappe-covered fists unclenched, and he felt a hand gently pressing a towel in between his fingers.

Why couldn’t this day just end?

“Seems like the world’s out to get you today, doesn’t it?” Younghoon hummed softly. Sunwoo felt him carefully dabbing at the caramel sticking to his eyelashes so he could pry his eyes open and dry himself off. “Things will be better tomorrow, I promise.”

He sure hoped so, because if they weren’t, he just knew he’d snap. He’d hit somebody or yell out a lie or say something he’d regret.

And he might not be able to take it back.

“Sunwoo, go to the bathroom and clean yourself up,” Sangyeon said. From his tone of voice, it was clear the woman hadn’t left peacefully. “Take as much time as you need.”

“Thank you,” the red-head mumbled out, and after accepting the wet towel Younghoon handed to him, made his escape to the bathroom. 

He spent a while there, wiping down his arms and apron and trying to fix up his coffee-stained hair. He looked a little better, but with the giant wet patches now splotched all over his body he knew he looked anything but presentable.

Hopefully customers wouldn’t run away thinking he was an extremely unhygienic person. 

Ten minutes later, he re-emerged feeling a little more refreshed. He desperately hoped he didn’t have to deal with another angry customer during his shift today, but with the way his day was going he knew that was hopeful wishing. 

Well, as long as they didn’t throw a coffee on him again, he’d be fine.

And, when he rounded the corner to the lobby and heard a familiar voice, he knew his day was about to get a whole lot brighter.

Chanhee was here.

“Is he okay?” the pink-haired boy was asking. He seemed agitated, worried about something as he spoke with Sangyeon. “Where’d he go?”

Oh, they must be talking about Joonyoung. Sangyeon had sent the poor guy home after he’d sprained his wrist. Wasn’t much use until he had a doctor’s note clearing him to work.

“He went to the bath-“ Sangyeon cut off whatever he was about to say when he locked eyes with Sunwoo. “Oh, he’s right there.”

Wait, they were talking about him? Sunwoo? The annoying employee that kept bickering with everybody? 

That was a first.

But honestly, it made Sunwoo feel so much better knowing that Chanhee - and Hyungseo, from the looks of it - were worried about him too. It was a nice feeling to have after a day gone wrong.

And, much to Sunwoo’s surprise, as soon as he was within arm’s distance, Chanhee suddenly scooped him up and held him against his chest. Warm arms engulfed his body in a protective case, and a soft head of hair rested next to his own, hands rubbing up and down his back in a soothing manner, as if to say everything would be okay.

For the first time that day, Sunwoo believed it. Everything would be okay. Maybe not today, but there was always tomorrow.

“I’m going to kill that lady,” Chanhee breathed in his ear, and just like that Sunwoo was huffing in quiet laughter. Trust Chanhee to be able to lift his spirits. “Are you okay?”

That question was difficult to answer, but it was becoming easier to determine with every second that saw him held tight in Chanhee’s embrace. 

“Yeah,” he said after a moment, pulling back. He didn’t like the sudden rush of cold that washed over him. “I will be. What about you?” 

He hoped Chanhee’s day had been a little bit better than his. After all, the pink haired boy had a day off from school to continue recovering from his cold. 

Hold up. 

His cold.

“Wait a second, what the heck are you doing here?” Sunwoo barked out. He placed his hands on his hips and wagged a finger at Chanhee. “I thought you were sick.”

“I was,” Chanhee grinned, “yesterday. You left before I got up this morning so I didn’t have a chance to tell you I was better. Your presence worked wonders on me last night, my friend.”

Sunwoo narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Chanhee, as if to scan his friend’s body for signs of a cold. “Uh huh, sure. In reality, your body is probably being bogged down by about half a dozen fever reducers and twenty gallons of soup. Just wait till they wear off, you’ll feel worse then, I promise.” Sunwoo reached out and sarcastically patted Chanhee’s shoulder.

The pink-haired boy just laughed. “I’ll look forward to it.”

He was so strange. The wink he sent Sunwoo after he spoke even more so.

Why had Sunwoo decided to become friends with him?

“Oh, hey, Sunwoo-yah,” Chanhee said, and Sunwoo blinked in question, “what did you do with the cupcakes I gave you? You said you came straight to my apartment after work yesterday, which means you wouldn’t have had a chance to hide them in your dorm. Those were strictly for you to eat.”

Of all the things Chanhee was worried about, it had to be his cupcakes. Must be bakery worthy if they were that important.

“They’re in the back room,” Sunwoo explained. “I’m going to bring them home after my shift ends, don’t worry. I wasn’t planning on sharing them with anyone anyway. I’m too selfish when it comes to food.”

Sunwoo was interrupted by a sharp cough behind him. He turned to see Sangyeon watching him with a sort of . . . frightened? expression. No, that wasn’t it. Concerned? Disturbed? Whatever it was, it wasn’t good.

Sunwoo’s heart sank, and all those good feelings spiraled into the ground beneath his feet.

What could possibly go wrong now?

“Um, I don’t think the morning shift knew you weren’t sharing those cupcakes,” the store owner announced a little sheepishly. “They were gone by the time I got here. I’m so sorry, Seonoo.”

Guilt.

That was the expression on Sangyeon’s face.

Sunwoo’s cupcakes were gone. 

This was awful. He’d been looking forward to biting into one after work, to treat himself to something nice after the horrendous day he’d had. They were going to be what held him through to tomorrow.

Sunwoo was so mad. He wanted to find out who’d eaten them and bash their head in, maybe make them bake him some more cupcakes. If there was one thing he knew, it was that he’d remember this for a long time to come.

“Whoa, Sunwoo-yah, it’s fine. I can always make you some more,” Chanhee tried to placate. His hands were out, tentatively reaching for Sunwoo’s arm, and the younger boy realized his fists were clenched and he was breathing heavily. 

When had he become this angry? When was the last time his first response to a situation had been to understand the person and not blame them for something that wasn’t their fault?

Maybe he really should take a break. He was so tired he was getting angry at everything and everyone without a moment’s notice.

He’d find himself in a bad situation at this rate, if he didn’t do something to curb his unbridled rage. He had a problem and he could fix it by taking care of himself for once. Screw what his parents thought.

Along with the epiphany about his temper, Sunwoo also noticed how dizzy he’d become. The world seemed to be slowly spinning around in his vision, and, suddenly frightened, he careened forward against the counter to catch himself from falling.

What was happening? 

He didn’t understand. Hadn’t he just been angry at someone for some reason? Then where had his anger gone?

Why couldn’t he feel the rest of his body? Why was everything so detached? And why were everybody’s faces swimming in and out of focus? Hadn’t he just been talking to them?

“Hey, Sunwoo, maybe you should sit down,” he dimly heard Chanhee say, and either he or Hyungseo added, “You’re really pale.”

They were probably right. He was panicking and didn’t feel very well. Everything around him was spinning and spinning and spinning, in and out of focus to the point he felt nauseated. He hadn’t even realized he was sweating until he felt it sticking to his temples and shirt. 

This wasn’t good.

He needed to sit. 

Sunwoo carefully pushed off the counter to try and head to the back room where he could sit. He’d only made it roughly two steps when a galaxy of stars erupted across his vision. He couldn’t see or hear anything past the ringing in his ears and the sudden rush of black that fell over his vision.

The next thing he knew, his body had hit the ground.

——

“Sunwoo-yah! Sunwoo-yah, please wake up!”

A voice sounded like it was coming from down a long tunnel when Sunwoo’s senses began to return to him. He recognized the voice as Chanhee’s, and as his brain cleared he could also hear Sangyeon and Hyungseo in the background. 

“Juyeon, can you hand me one of the water bottles from the fridge?” That was Sangyeon, always calm and in charge in emergency situations. Honestly one of the best people to run a business, as he could handle just about anything thrown his way. 

Slowly, everything started to come back to Sunwoo. He could hear the usual chatter that permeated a café, as well as the running engines of the cars in the drive thru. Several people were standing around him discussing what they should do to help.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t call an ambulance?” Hyungseo was asking. He sounded incredibly worried.

Sangyeon replied to him. “Give him a few seconds, and if he doesn’t wake up I’ll call one. He’s had a terrible day, so I’m honestly not surprised his body decided to shut down.”

“What happened?” Chanhee asked quietly. His voice was closest, so Sunwoo guessed he must be crouching on the floor beside him. 

“A lot. Too much to tell,” Sangyeon said, “but somebody tried to mug him on his way to work, and then there was the lady who threw coffee on him. Now this.”

Chanhee released a pained sound of sympathy. “That’s awful. He missed two of his classes this morning too. Hyunjae-hyung said he was really stressed about that.”

“Eric told me Sunwoo had to skip lunch too,” Juyeon added. He sounded farthest away - probably still behind the counter. “In our group chat. He hasn’t seen Sunwoo all day, so I’m wondering if he’s even eaten at all.”

“I’ll have him eat something when he wakes up then,” Sangyeon decided. “And he should probably stay hydrated as well.”

Amidst the quiet chatter from above, Sunwoo felt something cold held against his neck. From what Sangyeon had said earlier, Sunwoo could safely assume it was the water bottle Juyeon had gotten from the fridge. It worked wonders on his tired, overheated body and even gave him a spurt of energy. 

“Chanhee-hyung?” he whispered, softly. All conversations near him stopped. Sunwoo felt a hand wrap around his own.

“Sunwoo-yah? Are you awake?”

Sunwoo blinked his eyes open to the bright lights of the café above him, and when a dull ache settled behind his eyes, he squinted against the harsh glare. Someone - Sangyeon - held a hand over his forehead to block out the light.

“You’re taking all of next week off work, Sunwoo-yah,” was the first thing Sangyeon said to him. One look in his eyes told Sunwoo Sangyeon was a lot more worried about him than he let on. 

Sunwoo was filled with a conflict between relief and rejection. Unfortunately, he knew that he couldn’t afford to skip that many days of work, so the rejection won out. “Hyung, I can’t. If I miss too much work I won’t be able to pay off my next school bill. I can’t get behind in my payments or I won’t be able to go back to school next semester.”

“Sun, this is why I give my employees paid sick days and paid vacations,” Sangyeon said. 

Wait, he did?

Since when?

Why hadn’t Sunwoo known about this? If he’d known earlier, he easily would have asked for more days off and gotten the rest he needed. Instead, he’d worked so hard he’d run himself into the ground - literally. 

A bit of sadness flickered in Sangyeon’s eyes when he realized Sunwoo hadn’t known all of that. “I never noticed how tired you were, even though I’ve been working with you for a year now. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

“It’s not your fault, hyung,” Sunwoo muttered. And he meant it. The one responsible for reading the contracts had been him, so this whole situation was his own fault. How stupid could he be. “But I’ll take you up on that offer of a week off. Heaven knows I need it.”

Energy was ever so slowly filtering back into Sunwoo’s limbs. Though he was still a little dizzy and disoriented, he lifted himself up on his arms and carefully pushed off the floor until he was sitting up. Aside from a brief head-rush that had him squeezing his eyes shut, he was fine.

“The next time you almost get mugged, I’m karate-kicking you back to your dorm till I find the guy and punch him in the FACE!” Younghoon suddenly shouted over the counter. The comment was so random and comical after such a stressful evening that Sunwoo couldn’t help but snort in laughter. He saw the tension on Sangyeon’s face ease. 

“Har har, you’re so funny, hyung,” Sunwoo replied back dryly. Younghoon had such a strange mind. “You think you’re strong enough to beat someone up, but you’re actually just a weak baby.”

“WHAT?” Younghoon squawked indignantly. His head popped over the counter to glare playfully at Sunwoo. “You watch your mouth, young man, or I’ll tie it up with duct tape.” His expression softened immediately after he spoke, as he laid eyes on the tired Sunwoo. “Are you gonna be okay?”

Sunwoo pierced his friend with a withering look. “I’m tired, hyung, not dead.” 

“That’s unfortunate,” Juyeon shouted over the counter, to which Sunwoo just scoffed.

After his mood-uplifting “fight” with Younghoon and Juyeon came to a close, Sunwoo decided it was time to see how much he’d freaked out Chanhee. He froze when he laid his eyes on the boy.

“Are you - Are you crying?” 

Sure enough, Chanhee was. There were dried tear tracks on his cheeks and chin, a few fresh ones smudged underneath his eyes where he’d rubbed at them. One was threatening to spill out of the corner of his left eye. He had puffy red eyelids and a mouth still trembling in the attempt to quit crying. Somehow, he looked even more beautiful.

“I was so scared,” the pink-haired boy hiccuped out, quietly. It was only then that Sunwoo noticed Chanhee was the one supporting his back to keep him from falling backwards again. “When you fainted, I thought - I thought something really bad had happened to you. I thought, just for an instant, ‘what if he never wakes up’?”

Oh . . . 

Wow. 

Even after knowing Chanhee only the barest minimum, to have his new friend react this way shocked Sunwoo. He must have made a really good impression on Chanhee if he drew out this kind of reaction. It flattered him, for sure, knowing that Chanhee already felt for him as deeply as he did for Chanhee. But he was also kind of embarrassed he’d fainted in front of his crush in the first place.

“Well, I’m awake now,” he responded just as quietly. “And I’ll be okay once I get some rest, I think, so you don’t need to worry about me quite so much anymore.”

“I’ll always worry about you,” Chanhee whispered. He locked eyes with Sunwoo, unyielding; some sort of fire burned in their gazes. And then, for the second time that day, Chanhee pulled Sunwoo into a tight hug. “Don’t ever do that to me again.”

Something in Sunwoo’s heart broke at that, and he couldn’t have stopped himself from returning the hug even if he had wanted to. His arms searched and found Chanhee’s back - dainty, slim, but melded perfectly in his embrace - and he buried his head against Chanhee’s neck, the smell of lavender and oak wood filling his senses. This was the most at home he’d ever felt in his life. 

And Sunwoo knew, without a doubt, right then and there, that his feelings for Chanhee were immensely real.


	4. Getting to Know You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunwoo gets to spend more time with Chanhee, and feelings blossom. Also, there’s an almost-kiss.

“This is a problem.”

Five or six minutes had passed since Sunwoo’s fainting spell, and he now crouched over a table stuffing his face with a ham and cheese croissant Sangyeon had given to him. 

He’d told his friends, albeit a little sheepishly, that he hadn’t eaten anything that day in his rush to complete his homework on time. They’d scolded him about it, of course, but the way they immediately fought over what to get Sunwoo to eat told him they just wanted him to feel better.

Juyeon had also handed him the water bottle from earlier and made him drink it all - but only after tossing it about twenty times until it landed perfectly on its bottom. 

Such silly friends, but Sunwoo wouldn’t trade them for anyone. 

“Wait, so your roommate is going to be gone for how long?” Hyungseo asked him.

When commanded by his friends to go back to his dorm and make sure Changmin forced him to rest, Sunwoo had faced them with an unforeseen problem: Changmin would be gone until Thursday morning. That meant Sunwoo would either be spending the next two nights alone, or he’d have to crash at someone’s apartment. 

And with the way they were treating him right now, he knew they wouldn’t let him be alone tonight. Not until they were positive he wouldn’t pass out again.

“Until Thursday morning,” Sunwoo mumbled out around a mouthful of bread. He was already feeling much better. “I think he had some sort of trip for one of his major classes or something.”

Sangyeon let out a frustrated sigh at the news. “You can’t stay at Joonyoung’s either because their apartment is already full, and besides, he’s getting his wrist checked out.”

“Can I stay with you then?” Sunwoo asked Sangyeon plaintively. “I promise I’ll try to be quiet.”

“It’s not the quiet I’m worried about, Sun. It’s the sex my roommate Hyunjoon and his boyfriend have every night.”

Sunwoo choked on a particle of bread. “Gross. Too much information, hyung.”

“What?” Sangyeon asked innocently. “You always ask me why you can’t stay in my apartment. Now you know why.”

“You’re one to talk,” Hyungseo snorted. “Like you and Hyunjae-hyung are any better.”

Sangyeon flushed beet-red at Hyungseo’s brash words, words that Sunwoo had absolutely not been ready to hear or know. The rapper nearly choked again.

“Scandalous men!” Juyeon shouted from where he’d now been moved to drinks. He winked at Sangyeon for effect. 

“Oh, come on!” Sunwoo yelled back. “Everybody knows you and Younghoon-hyung are way more scandalous than that!”

Juyeon just waggled his eyebrows suggestively at Sunwoo, and the red-head shook his head and returned to focusing on his food.

Chanhee was watching him with an inscrutable expression. “Sunwoo-yah can stay with us,” he suggested after a moment, gently nudging Sunwoo’s foot with his own. “He already stayed with us last night, and we enjoyed his company. We wouldn’t mind him staying again.”

Sunwoo would have instantly protested if not for the fact that (1) Chanhee had been the one to suggest it and was clearly okay with it and (2) Hyungseo was eagerly nodding in confirmation. If they were both that desperate to have him over again, he’d gladly oblige.

“If you’re sure you guys don’t mind,” he gave in. “And if you don’t think Hyunjae-ssi will mind.”

“Are you kidding me?” Hyungseo smirked. “If Hyunjae-hyung wasn’t already in love with Sangyeon-hyung, I’m pretty sure he’d be in love with you.”

This time, both Sangyeon and Sunwoo colored red.

“Weird flex, but okay,” Sunwoo said hoarsely. He stuffed another mouthful of croissant between his lips so he wouldn’t have to say anything else.

Sangyeon awkwardly cleared his throat. “Well, now that that’s settled. Sunwoo-yah, how are you feeling?”

Four other heads trained on him in unison, and Sunwoo wanted to laugh. They were like children waiting to hear if they could have a snack or not. Even Juyeon and Younghoon had been eavesdropping on them.

“I feel a lot better,” he promised them. The last of the lingering concern faded from the eyes of his friends. “Still a little weak and shaky, but I don’t feel like I’ll pass out again.”

“That’s a relief, at least,” Hyungseo sighed. “Sounds like you just need to eat and get lots of rest.”

“You know those are the two main ingredients in a cat’s diet!” Juyeon shouted again. The customer standing next to him winced at the loudness of his voice, but the barista didn’t even offer the poor soul an apology. “I hereby declare that Sunwoo is a cat!”

“He is not!” Younghoon wailed back. “He’s a fox - cute but sly. And he’ll bite your butt when you’re not looking.” Younghoon shot Sunwoo a scathing look over the register.

“Nah, I think he’s a puppy,” Hyungseo reflected. “Cute and friendly but savage.”

“What, no! Puppies aren’t savage, and Sunwoo is definitely not friendly! I told you, he’s a cat!”

“Yeah, well you’re an alligator cause you have such a freaking big mouth.”

“Rude! You should know by now that I’m actually a porcupine. I look weird and I’m super prickly.”

“For once, we’re on the same page.”

While the employees and Hyungseo engaged in a heated debate about who was what animal, Sunwoo took the opportunity to grab a napkin and fling it in Chanhee’s general direction. It landed directly over Chanhee’s fingers.

The pink haired boy stared down at the napkin, then up at Sunwoo. “What is this for?”

“You sounded a bit congested when you were talking,” Sunwoo explained. “Blow your nose. I promise I won’t be grossed out.”

Chanhee huffed. “Who says I actually need it?”

Ugh, did he really have to explain? Sunwoo set the last few bites of his croissant down on his plate. “Unlike in movies,” he said, “congestion from crying does not magically disappear. Now blow your nose or I’ll hit you.”

“Harsh much,” Chanhee grinned, but blew his nose all the same. Sunwoo returned to his sandwich, satisfied. “Do you want to head out now?”

“Dude, I haven’t even finished my croissant yet. Patience.”

Chanhee held his hands up in defeat. “I was just asking.”

Sunwoo pointed at Chanhee with his croissant. “Watch yourself.”

“That’s kind of hard to do considering my eyes are part of my face.”

“Then get a mirror.”

“And stare at myself in it all day?” 

“What else would you do with it?” Sunwoo snorted.

“Wipe that smirk off your face.”

Sunwoo eyed Chanhee with more than a little indifference. “Well, anyways, I wanted to request that we make a stop at my dorm on the way to your apartment. If I’m going to be spending the night with you I need to make sure I have my homework and toiletries.”

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Chanhee started absently picking at a string on the edge of his long-sleeve plaid shirt. “Bring anything else you want to as well, like games or something. My roommates and I are pretty social people.”

“So is my roommate,” Sunwoo smiled. He kind of missed Changmin and his crazy antics. “I shouldn’t have a problem socializing.”

“Really? Could’ve fooled me.” 

Chanhee dodged the sudden chunk of croissant that came flying through the air at him. When he popped back up, he noticed Sunwoo giving him an expressionless face. 

“Hey, you finished,” he pointed out with just a hint of saltiness. “So we can go now?”

Sunwoo continued to stare at him. “Why’re you so eager to get out of here? You not like my friends or something?”

“Oh, I like your friends well enough. I just like my apartment better at the moment.”

Finally, Sunwoo shrugged. “Eh, fair enough.”

Sunwoo grabbed Sangyeon’s attention and asked his boss to take his plate for him. Sangyeon did, and Younghoon came to take his trash and throw it out.

Once he was sure everything had been taken care of, Sunwoo motioned to Hyungseo and Chanhee that he was ready to go.

Almost immediately, Chanhee was out of his seat and at Sunwoo’s side, ready to help him out to the car. And for once, Sunwoo didn’t deny the offer of help and let Chanhee pull him up.

There were a few seconds of tension when Sunwoo’s vision clouded with pulsing stars again and he had to lean heavily against Chanhee. But the food must have boosted his energy enough that the dizziness quickly passed.

“You good?” Chanhee asked worriedly. Sunwoo noticed Chanhee had an arm around his waist and a hand pressing into his stomach to hold him steady. “We can wait longer if you need us to.”

Sunwoo shook his head, instantly regretted it when he staggered. “No, I think I can make it with help.” 

“We’ll go slow,” Chanhee promised him. The pink haired boy motioned for Hyungseo to step in on Sunwoo’s other side and steady him when necessary. “Let’s go.” 

It took a little while and more than a couple of stops, but Sunwoo eventually made it outside and into the back seat of Chanhee’s car where he could rest for a bit. As they drove out of the parking lot, Sunwoo noticed Juyeon and Younghoon blowing him sarcastic kisses through the window of the café. 

He couldn’t help but smile. Those two always knew how to make him laugh.

——

Getting up the stairs to his dorm room was a little tricky. With the way the dorms were laid out, only students with disabilities were on the first floor, which meant that other students were on the second floor or higher.

There were no elevators, so Sunwoo, Hyungseo, and Chanhee were forced to figure out a way to get Sunwoo up the stairs. They decided on having Hyungseo piggy-back him up while Chanhee supported them from the back.

After twenty steps and a near-death experience that Chanhee prevented, they’d made it onto the floor with no major mishaps. Sunwoo told Hyungseo he could walk on his own now, but the older man insisted on carrying him all the way to his dorm room just in case.

It was nice to know his friends would go to these lengths to help him out, but it was kind of a new experience for him.

Of course, he’d also never fainted before, so that was a new experience too.

Well, if they were insisting on taking care of him, who was he to complain? 

They’d nearly made it to his dorm room when Sunwoo spotted a familiar figure down the hall, walking next to another student.

“Hey, Eric!” Sunwoo yelled. Both Chanhee and Hyungseo flinched at the unexpected shouting (and Sunwoo thought  _ he  _ was the scaredy-cat). “Eric! Come here!”

“Sunwoo-hyung?” Youngjae responded incredulously. “What are you doing here? I thought Juyeon-hyung said you fainted at work!”

They were close enough now they no longer needed to shout. Sunwoo could see the other person’s face; he noted it was someone he’d never met before. 

“I did,” Sunwoo said. “That’s why Hyungseo-hyung is carrying me.”

“Trust me, if Sunwoo could walk I never would have hauled his big butt up here on my back,” Hyungseo panted. Sunwoo was about to protest when something clicked in Hyungseo’s mind. “Wait, Eric? Jacob-hyung’s roommate?”

Startled, Youngjae shifted uncomfortably. “Um, yeah? Do I know you?”

“No, not yet,” Hyungseo assured him. “I’m Kevin Moon, a friend he met recently. I’m from Canada. He told me about you since you speak English.”

The suspicion cleared from Youngjae’s eyes. In fact, he almost seemed excited. “Oh, you’re the Kevin he keeps telling me about! Yeah, I speak English. So does my friend here.” Youngjae brought his friend forward, a uniquely beautiful individual with warm freckles and a friendly smile. Sunwoo instantly felt at ease around him. “This is Felix Lee - he’s from Australia, so his native language is English like yours.”

The conversation quickly shifted to English from there. Sunwoo glanced back over his shoulder to meet Chanhee’s confused gaze. “Maybe we should go,” he half-whispered, half-laughed. “They might be out here for hours.” 

Chanhee peeked around Hyungseo’s shoulder to see the other three heartily engaged in a rapid English conversation. That was all he needed to glance back up at Sunwoo and giggle. “I think you’re right. Here, let me help you down.”

With Chanhee’s help, Sunwoo quickly clambered off of Hyungseo’s back and wobbled into his dorm room to search for his necessities. He was just about to heave his laptop off his desk when Chanhee swooped in and snatched it before he could.

“Are you crazy?” the older boy screeched. “You think I’m going to let you carry something this heavy when you just fainted?”

“Um . . .”

“No!” Chanhee hefted the laptop under one arm and with the other pulled Sunwoo to his bed and forced him to sit. “You stay there and tell me where everything is. I’ll get it all for you.”

It was a good system, Sunwoo had to admit. With him giving orders and Chanhee stuffing everything into his backpack, they finished up and were ready to go in less than five minutes. 

Now they just had to wait for Hyungseo. 

When another five minutes passed and there was no sign of Hyungseo finishing up his conversation, Sunwoo draped himself over his bed with a sigh. He wanted to sleep, but he couldn’t until he got to Chanhee’s apartment. 

He had half a mind to go out there and tell Hyungseo to shut up and take them home. But he wouldn’t take away this opportunity for Hyungseo to make new English-speaking friends. It was only fair. 

And besides, Hyungseo was nice and Sunwoo wanted the guy to be happy. He could wait a few more minutes if it helped make that happen. 

“Whatcha thinking about?”

Sunwoo cracked his eyes open to see Chanhee standing above him, watching him with curiosity. A smile flitted over his lips, unbidden.

“Kevin-hyung,” he responded. “It’s nice to see him fitting in so well with my friends. And it’s really nice to see Eric more comfortable now that he’s making friends outside of college.”

“I bet Eric has a giant posse of English-speaking friends,” Chanhee laughed. “There’s Jacob-ssi, that guy Felix, and now Keb-hyung.”

“Keb-hyung?”

Chanhee shrugged. “It’s a nickname Kevin-hyung likes. I don’t remember when we started calling him that.” Chanhee gently pushed Sunwoo’s legs out of the way so he could sit on the edge of the bed. “Also, Hyunjae-hyung’s real name is actually Jaehyun. He accidentally swapped the spelling around when he was a kid and it stuck.”

“That’s kind of funny,” Sunwoo chortled. “But I think Hyunjae suits him.”

“It sure does.” Chanhee looked like he wanted to say something else, was too afraid or too shy too, but an instant later he went for it anyway. “I think Sun suits you too.”

A little shocked at the sudden outright flirting, Sunwoo raised his head to see Chanhee staring at the ceiling with cheeks as pink as his hair. It was hilarious, somehow, yet flattering and warming at the same time, because a reaction like that told Sunwoo Chanhee had said it from his heart.

Maybe Sangyeon had been right. Maybe Chanhee was interested in Sunwoo too.

Just that very thought had Sunwoo’s insides roiling with nervous butterflies - he actually had a chance here. A big one. 

He couldn’t - no, wouldn’t - ruin this. For himself, or for Chanhee.

“Well, I don’t know why people call me that,” he ventured after a minute, “because I’m anything but bright and friendly like the sun.”

He’d averted his gaze, but he could feel Chanhee’s hard stare on him. It was so piercing and so uncomfortable that Sunwoo felt his own cheeks flushing. 

“Maybe to them,” Chanhee murmured. “But the one thing about you I do know is that you always brighten my day.”

The flush successfully raided Sunwoo’s cheeks. He lifted his hands and covered his face to hide the grin that wouldn’t leave his lips. 

“Oh my god, stop flirting with me,” Sunwoo groaned past his fingers. 

He heard a soft laugh from the boy sitting by his feet. “What, you don’t like it?”

“No, I do. I’m just not used to it is all.”

“Hey,” Chanhee said softly. Sunwoo felt him moving around, and the next second a pair of hands gently grasped his and pulled them down from his face. He stared up into Chanhee’s radiant, shining eyes. “You’re worthy of every compliment I give you, you know that, right?”

There was something ultimately tender and fond in his voice, a tone Sunwoo had never heard someone use before. It sent his heart aflutter, and those butterflies in the pit of his stomach took flight until they’d migrated to his chest. This couldn’t be real, could it? Chanhee staring at him like this, speaking to him like this,  _ wanting  _ him like this. Showing him an unconditional love despite all the flaws he thought he had or saw in himself.

Sunwoo wanted to kiss him.

But then, the moment shattered when an obnoxiously familiar voice interrupted them. “You guys better not be flirting in here!”

It was Youngjae, and if there ever had been a time when Sunwoo wanted to slap him (which, quite frankly, was often), now would be that time. Youngjae had just walked in on a very private moment between the two; he might have even ruined Sunwoo’s chance for a first kiss.

The red-head wanted to scream at his best friend.

But he wouldn’t do that. Youngjae didn’t understand, didn’t know. It wasn’t his fault.

Instead, Sunwoo settled for whipping his head in Youngjae’s direction, perfectly in sync with Chanhee, to glare daggers at his best friend for ruining their moment. 

Youngjae took one look at the both of them and realized his mistake. “Oh my goodness, they are flirting!” he announced to Felix and Hyungseo. When the two in question tried to peep their heads around the corner and see Chanhee and Sunwoo for themselves, Youngjae instantly pushed them back and shut the door. On his way out, he loudly proclaimed, “Nothing to see here! We can keep talking.”

Well, Sunwoo had to give him credit for understanding the situation and letting them be alone for a moment longer. It would’ve been embarrassing if Hyungseo and Felix especially, as a stranger, had seen them. 

Not that they were in an intimate position or anything, they weren’t. Just that Sunwoo had finally been alone with the boy he liked and nearly had an opportunity to kiss him. So yes, he wanted some privacy.

But unfortunately for him, Youngjae’s interruption had shattered the moment completely. Even now, with the door closed, Chanhee had already released Sunwoo’s hands and padded away from him.

Something in Sunwoo’s heart ached at the missed opportunity. And yet, at the same time, something warm blossomed with every beat of life in his chest when he realized that Chanhee would have kissed him back.

They may have missed their chance today, and they might not have another one for a while. But, watching Chanhee gather up his things and place them by the door, Sunwoo knew there would definitely be another chance.

“You ready to go?” Chanhee asked him. There was still a gentleness to his voice that soothed Sunwoo’s heart. They shared a smile across the room.

“Yep, I’m ready.” Sunwoo ever-so-carefully stood, delighted when only a slight rush of dizziness met him. He could easily handle himself like this without too much help. But he’d still let Chanhee carry his stuff. He knew he wasn’t getting out of that.

He joined Chanhee by the door, watched his friend reach for the door handle and begin to push it down. Then, out of nowhere, something - a drive, a desire, a wish for Chanhee to see how much he meant to Sunwoo - washed over the rapper, and he suddenly placed his hand over Chanhee’s.

“You’re the reason I smile everyday,” he breathed into Chanhee’s ear. He felt a shiver tremble through the boy pressed against him, and smiled knowing that he had made Chanhee happy. 

He didn’t even look at Chanhee’s expression as he opened the door and brushed by his taller friend, their fingers brushing together as he slid past. He didn’t need to.

He did look at Hyungseo’s expression the moment he walked out into the hall, however.

And something in Hyungseo’s gaze really, really unsettled him. 

——

“Are we having a party? Why is Sunwoo-yah here again?” was the first thing Hyunjae said when Sunwoo made it to Chanhee’s apartment. 

Sunwoo couldn’t believe they’d forgotten to tell Hyunjae he was coming.

“Sunwoo-yah fainted at work today, and since his roommate won’t be here to watch him tonight, Chanhee-yah and I volunteered to take him,” Hyungseo said. The Canadian did a double-take on Hyunjae’s expression. “You are okay with that, right?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah,” Hyunjae grinned. “It’s no problem. I like Sunwoo.” The man ambled over to Sunwoo and flung an arm around the red-head’s shoulder. “In all seriousness, though, are you okay now? We don’t need to take you to the hospital or anything?”

“If I needed to go to the hospital, I’d already be there,” Sunwoo muttered. He slipped his shoes off next to the door of the apartment and made his way directly to the couch. There, he fell backward until he was surrounded by the softness of the cushions. “Now let me sleep for about a year and then we can talk.”

A smattering of sympathetic laughs echoed through the apartment. Sunwoo heard someone walking up to him and dropping his backpack by his head. He didn’t bother to see who it was. 

Until, that was, they asked, “Do you want to sleep in my room? You’ll be more comfortable there.”

Unsurprisingly, it was Chanhee offering. Sunwoo didn’t want to intrude on his privacy or his room, so he merely shook his head. “It’s fine, I’m comfortable enough out here. Back home I used to sleep on the couch too.”

“Why?” Hyunjae asked. “Beds have too much room?”

“Nope, it’s just quieter away from the bedrooms,” Sunwoo responded. “I’ve never slept well, but I always sleep better when I’m on a couch.”

“Weird,” Hyungseo judged. He emerged from behind the couch to place a cup of water in front of Sunwoo. “But you do you, I guess.”

“‘You do you’?” Sunwoo repeated. He’d never heard anyone say that before, and he couldn’t really discern the meaning.

Hyungseo didn’t seem to want to explain, though. “It’s an English thing.”

Of course it was.

“He’s always saying stuff we don’t understand,” Hyunjae told Sunwoo. “You kind of get used to it after awhile. Although I still don’t understand half the things he says even though he’s told me what they mean.” Hyunjae shrugged. “So I gave up trying.”

“He’s just jealous that I can speak Korean but he can’t speak English,” Hyungseo laughed. “Said it’s unfair, or something like that.”

“It is! How come you get to say cool phrases that make no sense but I don’t?”

“There are plenty of cool phrases in Korean.”

“Oh, yeah? Like what?”

As Hyungseo and Hyunjae disappeared down the hallway, along with their amusing conversation, Chanhee continued to hover close by. Sunwoo got the feeling he wanted say something.

“Spit it out,” he ordered with eyes closed. 

Chanhee startled. Sunwoo could practically hear the guy anxiously biting his lip in the silence that followed. “Look, I know school is really important to you and your parents want you to do well and stuff, and I get that you’re a good student and you have good grades and everything, but please take tomorrow off? You’re obviously overwhelmed with work and going back to school tomorrow will probably make you faint again, and I don’t want to have to see that happen again if I can help it.” 

Chanhee said all of that in one breath, speaking as quickly as possible and panting by the time he’d finished. He’d clearly been frightened of speaking his thoughts to Sunwoo, and, as Sunwoo peeked at him, was wringing his hands as he stared down at his friend. “So please skip school tomorrow?” he finished more calmly. 

Now, Sunwoo had already promised himself he’d take tomorrow off for his own sake. He was so sick of feeling constantly exhausted and ready to collapse that he really wanted - no, needed - to take some time off so he could forget about his worries and responsibilities for once. 

But he knew that if he hadn’t already decided to take tomorrow off for his own sake, he would have done it for Chanhee’s sake. He didn’t ever want to be the reason the perfect boy in front of him cried again. 

“Don’t worry, I will,” he promised. Chanhee’s shoulders sunk in relief at the news. “I’m thinking of taking Thursday off as well. One of my teachers already gave me a pass for her class, and I’ll still have plenty of absences for the rest of the semester.”

“Yes, that would be a great idea.” Chanhee was smiling so widely now Sunwoo wondered how his face didn’t hurt. He was happy that his decision was the reason he was receiving this beautiful smile from the man he liked. “Do you want anything to eat? I can make you something.”

“Maybe later. I’m still full from the croissant Sangyeon-hyung gave me. I really just want to sleep right now.”

“Sure. Do you want a pillow or a blanket?”

“Yeah, both would be great.”

“Okay, I’ll be right back.”

While Chanhee ventured off to search for blankets and pillows, Sunwoo hauled himself up into a sitting position and grabbed his phone from inside his backpack. There were a couple of people he needed to text.

The first was Changmin. Sunwoo told him about his day, what had happened, and his new living arrangements for the night. Almost as soon as he hit “Send,” his screen lit up with an incoming call. 

Sunwoo smiled at the name scrawled across the top. 

“Changmin-hyung, hi.”

“Are you okay? What happened? I need details!” 

Yep, it was definitely Changmin. Hyper and interested and concerned all at once - a feat not many people could pull off.

“I’m fine now, hyung, just a little tired,” Sunwoo said. “Everything just seemed to go wrong today, you know - woke up late, missed two classes, turned in homework late. Didn’t eat breakfast or lunch, got mugged on my way to work, had coffee dumped on me, oh, and the best part? Yeah, I fainted. Just like you said I would if I didn’t slow down.”

“I swear you’re just like a two-year-old,” Changmin sighed, and Sunwoo could almost picture him shaking his head in disappointment. “As soon as I’m gone, you get in trouble.”

“It’s all good now, I promise,” Sunwoo replied. “I’m staying over at a friend’s house so they can keep an eye on me tonight, and I’m not going to school tomorrow or Thursday so I can get some proper rest.”

“What about your parents?” Changmin asked. For once, his voice had gone quiet. 

“You know, for the longest time I’ve been terrified of telling them how I feel. But I realized that’s the biggest reason why I fainted today. It’s not healthy, so I’m going to text my parents after we hang up and tell them what I’ve decided to do. If they don’t like it, well, then they can keep it to themselves.”

“I’m proud of you, Seonoo,” Changmin whispered. If Sunwoo heard a sniffle over the line, he said nothing about it. “I know it’ll be hard, but I believe you can do it.” 

Changmin, though a little loud and wild for most people to handle, had this utterly soft side to him that Sunwoo would forever appreciate. Yeah, sure, sometimes he hid in the bathroom while Changmin chased after Eric trying to bite him. But Changmin was always the first person to congratulate and encourage Sunwoo whenever he needed it. 

“Oh, Seonoo, what about work? I better hear you say you’re not going or I’m flying back down there and tying you to your bed.”

Sunwoo laughed out loud at that, his voice floating through the apartment as he doubled over in laughter. It wasn’t so much what Changmin said as it was the way he said it.

“Don’t worry, you old nanny, Sangyeon-hyung is refusing to let me work for the next week straight.”

“Bless that man and his grandfatherly soul, I would go down there and kiss him right this minute if I could. He seriously deserves the boss of the year award. Come on, let’s hack the South Korean database and put his name at the top of the list.”

Sunwoo nearly fell off the couch from the force of his laughter. He had to hold his side because it hurt so much, and he had tears building at the corners of his eyes. This was exactly what he’d needed today.

“You- You’re not smart enough to hack a database, hyung,” he gasped. Chanhee returned at that moment, eyebrows raising in question when he saw Sunwoo a red, laughing mess on his couch.

“Yah, I take offense in that. I’m telling Sangyeon-hyung.”

“You go do that. He’ll take my side any day.”

“Just because you work for him doesn’t mean he likes you!” Changmin screeched, and Sunwoo had to hold the phone away from his ear before it burst. 

Chanhee’s eyebrows climbed higher. 

“Hey, hey, I gotta go now, hyung,” Sunwoo cut in. He waited until Changmin shut up before adding, “I’ll see you on Thursday, okay?”

“Yeah, fine, ignore me and go drown in a pail of oil,” Changmin snickered. “Oh, and if you ever need to hear one of those infamous dolphin screams again, you know who to call!”

“I would never-!” Sunwoo shouted into the phone, but Changmin ended the call before he could finish speaking. Happily exhausted now, Sunwoo slid down the couch until his neck was bent at a ninety-degree angle. He felt even better after talking to Changmin. 

“Who was that?” Chanhee asked. 

Sunwoo had nearly forgotten he was here. “Oh, that was my roommate, Ji Changmin. I told him what happened and he called me.”

“He sounds like a handful,” Chanhee commented. He was working on fluffing up the pillows for Sunwoo. “Or fun. I couldn’t tell which from the way you were laughing.”

Was that . . . was that jealously resting over Chanhee’s features? He didn’t think Sunwoo and Changmin were together, did he? Not when Changmin was already interested in Joonyoung’s roommate, Haknyeon? 

Felt kind of nice, actually, knowing Chanhee was already protective of him. 

“Imagine Juyeon-hyung and Younghoon-hyung wrapped into one, but ten times louder,” Sunwoo stated. Chanhee just let out an uninterested “mm hmm.” Wow. He was really jealous. “Course, he’s too loud for me to handle sometimes, so I’d never want to, like, be more than friends with him.”

A subtle hint. One that Chanhee picked up on immediately, as he shot Sunwoo a quick glance out of the corner of his eyes.

“Are you ready to sleep?” the pink haired boy asked, to which Sunwoo shook his head.

“There’s something I need to do first.”

Scooching back up the couch, Sunwoo leaned forward and patted the space beside him, an invitation for Chanhee to sit. The boy did, and Sunwoo, without giving the other a single warning, shifted until he was comfortably resting against Chanhee’s shoulder.

“I need to text my parents,” he explained quietly, “and I don’t think they’re going to like what I have to say.” He craned his head back until he could see Chanhee’s face, saw the fondest look in the dark golden eyes staring down at him from above. The look only spurred him to finish what he’d been saying. “Stay with me until I finish texting them? It’ll be easier if you’re here.”

Chanhee smiled at him. “If that’s what you want.” 

Good. Sunwoo had someone here he could rely on in case he chickened out. And if his parents reacted as negatively as Sunwoo feared they would, he wouldn’t have to go far to find comfort either.

While he worked on typing out a decent response to his parents, shaking a little in anxiety, Chanhee lifted an arm and wrapped it around him, pulling him close. Now Sunwoo’s head was resting on Chanhee’s chest.

It was comfortable, here in Chanhee’s arms, feeling the soft beat of his heart and the rush of air as he breathed. Sunwoo felt so warm and relaxed he didn’t even realize he’d finished the text until his thumb was hovering over the “send” button. 

“You can do this,” Chanhee murmured to him. “I know it’s hard and you’re scared of what will happen, but you can’t avoid what needs to be said. Go ahead and send it.”

He was right.

If it was this hard for Sunwoo to send, it meant it needed to be said, or he’d let this weigh on him until he did something he regretted. It would also be freeing, he knew, no matter how his parents reacted. Just telling them what he’d been thinking all along was enough to make him feel better - and therefore, to believe that sending this message was the right thing to do.

He didn’t hesitate to hit the button and send the message. There was no going back now; he couldn’t undo what had just been done. 

Sunwoo clicked his phone off and placed it on the table once he’d finished. He wouldn’t be checking his messages until he’d had some proper rest.

“I’m proud of you,” Chanhee said when Sunwoo fell back against his chest. “I promise you you’ll see good results from doing the right thing, whether it be now or later.”

“I know,” Sunwoo replied. He was so tired now. He wanted nothing more than to crash and not wake up for days on end. “Do you still have the pillow?”

“Oh, yeah.” Chanhee reached down over the armrest until he’d dragged the pillow into Sunwoo’s hands. “Are you sure you don’t want to sleep in my room?”

“Nope.” Sunwoo took the pillow and fluffed it up on top of Chanhee’s lap. He saw the look of confusion cross his pink-haired friend’s face, but his expression cleared when Sunwoo stretched out on the couch with his head on the pillow - and on Chanhee’s lap. “I’m fine right where I am.”

“You’re so cute,” Chanhee giggled, and began to thread his fingers through Sunwoo’s red-dyed hair. “Now try to get some sleep.”

It didn’t take long for Sunwoo to follow his directions.

——

He woke to the smell of moo saengchae (radish strip kimchi) and kongnamul bab (bean sprout rice) wafting through the apartment.

It had been such a long time since Sunwoo had eaten something other than instant ramyeun or the gross food his dining common served (save the croissant Sangyeon gave him last night), and his mouth was watering at the mere proposition of a tasty breakfast. 

He blinked his eyes open to see the ceiling lights blazing down on him. He was clearly still on the couch, head tilted back at an awkward angle, and when he glanced to his right he saw Chanhee smiling down at him. Those wonderful fingers were carding through his hair again.

If it weren’t for the lure of breakfast, he could have easily gone right back to sleep. 

“Good morning,” Chanhee mumbled to him. “Did you sleep well?”

“Never slept better,” he replied. His voice was choked with morning roughness. “You?”

“Pretty well. How are you feeling today? Any better?”

“Give me about an hour to wake up and I’ll let you know,” Sunwoo said. Chanhee laughed in response. “What time is it?”

“Mm, around ten, I think.”

“Wait, what time did I go to bed?”

“Well, you fainted around eight last night . . . and we got here about nine? So I’d say probably around nine thirty or so,” Chanhee decided. He was rubbing his neck as if it hurt, or had a cramp. 

“Wow, so I slept for over twelve hours? There’s a feat I never thought I’d accomplish again.”

“You obviously needed it,” Chanhee said. “So I’m glad you were able to sleep that long. And I’m glad we could help.”

“I’m glad you were willing,” Sunwoo murmured. He and Chanhee exchanged endearing smiles. Then Sunwoo frowned. “You didn’t stay out here all night with me, did you?”

Chanhee awkwardly rubbed at his neck again. “Um, I may have? You looked so peaceful and comfortable sleeping on my lap that I didn’t have the heart to get up and wake you. Besides, I slept well anyway. I just have a twisted muscle in my neck or something.”

“As long as that’s it,” Sunwoo stated firmly. “You should’ve gone to bed.”

“Too late. What’s done is done.”

“Whatever.” Sunwoo slowly sat up, a little sad when Chanhee stopped running his fingers through his hair, and released a loud yawn. He stretched his arms and legs to their fullest lengths. “Who’s making breakfast?”

“Kebin-hyung is,” Chanhee said, and nodded his chin in the direction of the kitchen.

Sunwoo turned to see for himself, and sure enough, Hyungseo stood in the kitchen boiling some radish strip kimchi. 

“Morning!” the older man called. He flashed Sunwoo one of his signature smiles.

The atmosphere in this apartment was always so nice, exactly what Sunwoo needed. When he needed quiet, it was quiet. When he needed friendly, it was friendly. And when he needed loud, it was loud. These three roommates could read each other, and other people, well.

“Hey.” Chanhee interrupted Sunwoo’s train of thought by tapping him on the arm. “I’m gonna go get ready. I have two classes this afternoon at my uni.”

“Okay. Can I come with you?”

“I’d rather you rest, Sun.”

“Yeah, but I want to check out your college. And it’s not like I’ll be doing work or anything - I’ll just wander around while you’re in class. I could use the fresh air anyways.”

Chanhee looked like he greatly wanted to protest, but there was nothing he could do to stop Sunwoo, especially when the rapper was promising to do nothing but walk around an enjoy himself. In the end, Chanhee decided it wouldn’t hurt.

“Fine. But the moment you feel dizzy or faint, come get me.”

“Deal.”

With their plans for the day sealed, Chanhee disappeared into the hallway leading to his room, and Sunwoo was left to wander over to where Hyungseo poked at the kongnamul bab with a spatula.

“Morning, Sunwoo-yah,” Hyungseo greeted him.

“Morning, Kevin-ssi.”

Sunwoo swung himself onto one of the stools by the kitchen island, resting his chin on his hands as he watched Hyungseo cook. 

“Why don’t you call me hyung?” Hyungseo suggested. He added a few radishes to the kimchi. “I think we know each other well enough now.”

Oh, sweet! Another friend Sunwoo could talk to now! He always saw ‘hyung’ as a universal sign of friendship on the older boy’s side, so he knew Hyungseo saw him as a well-liked friend. The feelings were mutual.

“Thank you, hyung.” Sunwoo gave Hyungseo a beaming smile.

For the next two or three minutes, they were silent as Hyungseo cooked and Sunwoo watched. Sunwoo had never been one for cooking, especially with college and work getting in his way, so it always fascinated him to see how other people cooked - their tastes, their systems, their particularities.  Some people even mixed steps up. 

If he weren’t so busy, Sunwoo might even try his hand at cooking. He’d probably fail, but at least he’d have tried.

Hyungseo, he noticed, followed the recipe down to every little detail, and that made the food look all the more appealing to Sunwoo. He couldn’t wait to try it.

Sunwoo was getting ready to offer to help Hyungseo when the older man suddenly put the spatula down and said, “Sunwoo, can I ask you something?”

Uh oh. This couldn’t be good. Something about Hyungseo’s tone matched the look Sunwoo had seen in his eyes last night, and he suddenly felt extremely anxious. 

What was he supposed to think? What would come out of this conversation?

“Um, sure. Yeah. Why not?”

Hyungseo looked Sunwoo straight in the eye. “Are you sure you want to date Chanhee?”

Oh. So that’s what he’d been wanting to ask. Probably an overprotective best friend looking out for his roommate. But hadn’t Hyungseo already implied that he knew Sunwoo liked Chanhee? Or at least that Chanhee liked Sunwoo? 

So why bring it up now?

“If he wants to date me back, then yes, I think so,” he said honestly. 

“Why do you like him?”

Sunwoo hadn’t really thought about that before. He knew it was kind of a common question that got asked when people wanted to get into a relationship, but he’d never stopped to ask himself why he liked Chanhee. 

“What, is this one of those tests where if I don’t give you an answer I like, you won’t let me date him?” Getting straight to the point and being blunt, because Sunwoo would not let anyone come between him and Chanhee unless Chanhee allowed it. But when he saw Hyungseo’s stare glinting at him dangerously, he realized he should probably answer honestly. 

“There’s nothing much more to say than I like him because he’s him. He came into my life at a time I really needed him, took me under his wing, cared for me in his own little way even though it was hard for me to see. I actually didn’t like him at first. But as time started to go on, I realized that I always began to look forward to when he’d come in. I wanted to see him smile, hear his laugh, bicker with him like we always did. 

“He makes me incredibly happy, hyung, in a way that no one’s ever made me happy before. And all I hope to accomplish through a possible relationship with him is making him just as happy as he makes me. If I can do that, then I want to be with him for as long as I can.”

By the time he finished, Hyungseo’s expression had significantly softened, and he even returned to stirring the food around in the pan. Sunwoo guessed he must have said something right, else he would have been kicked out right then and there.

“You do make him happy,” the older man told him, and something warm blossomed in Sunwoo’s chest at hearing those words. “And if your goal is to keep him happy, which is all I ask, then you have my permission to move forward with him.”

Not that Sunwoo needed his permission, as Chanhee was an adult and could make his own decisions. But it was nice to know that Chanhee’s best friend approved of them. It would make things a whole lot easier.

“Thank you, hyung. That means a lot to me.”

“I will warn you, though, Sunwoo,” Hyungseo suddenly added. Sunwoo quickly lifted his head to glance at Hyungseo, only to see the man already staring at him. “Be careful with him.”

Sunwoo tried to fight off a grin. This was just like what had happened in the café a few days ago. “Why, because you’ll kill me if I’m not?”

Hyungseo set his spatula down again, this time to pointedly gaze into Sunwoo’s eyes with his own dark ones flashing, and Sunwoo’s heart suddenly dropped into his toes.

He had a horrible feeling that he was not going to like what Hyungseo was about to say.

“No, Sunwoo. Because Chanhee cheated on his last boyfriend.” 


	5. Conflict

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunwoo struggles with discovering the truth, but eventually receives some good advice and follows it.
> 
> A shorter chapter for y’all.

“Why are you telling me this?”

Sunwoo didn’t know how he was supposed to feel after the news. Chanhee was a cheater? He’d cheated on a previous boyfriend? How many previous boyfriends had Chanhee even had?

In that moment, Sunwoo understand just how little he knew about Chanhee. And it hurt his heart, to think he might have gotten his hopes up for nothing.

“Because you have a right to know,” Hyungseo growled firmly. “Better for you to duck out now than find this out months down the road and end up breaking both yours and his heart.”

“Look, I appreciate you looking out for me, and him. But I think that I should be hearing this Chanhee-hyung, not from you.”

Hyungseo still had his eyes riveted on Sunwoo’s. “And if he never told you?”

“Guilt would have made him confess at some point,” Sunwoo stated. His mind took him back to Giwook, and how his old ex had eventually come clean about their break up. “Trust me, I know.”

“Okay, I get it, Sunwoo. You’re in denial. But ultimately, as Chanhee’s best friend and someone who doesn’t want to see you get hurt . . . I’m telling you this now so you can run while you still have a chance.”

Surely Chanhee couldn’t be that bad. Surely, with his pure smile and trilling laugh, he wouldn’t cheat on Sunwoo. Surely, with the signs he was giving, he really liked Sunwoo and would never  want  to cheat on him.

Right?

Could Hyungseo be right? Could Sunwoo just have been blinded by a crush this whole time, and he’d missed what Chanhee was truly like?

He didn’t know what to think.

But he did know one thing for sure.

“Listen, I’ll keep what you’ve said in mind,” he promised quietly, “but I want to get Chanhee-hyung’s side of the story first. I’m not going to bail on him without hearing him out.”

Hyungseo studied Sunwoo, looking at him like he wanted to say something but was refraining from doing so. There was a new glint to his eyes that somehow eased the torment in Sunwoo’s heart. “Fair enough. But don’t say I didn’t tell you.”

“Sunwoo-yah! Ready to go?”

Chanhee had walked in at the worst possible moment. Sunwoo had to force himself to tear his gaze away from Hyungseo, to make himself look at the beautiful face of the boy he’d come to like. For the first time since he’d met Chanhee, doubt clouded Sunwoo’s mind.

Everything about Chanhee seemed like a trick to him now.

But he couldn’t let Chanhee know what he’d just learned. He’d already promised Hyungseo he’d get the other boy’s side of the story, and he intended to do just that. He just wasn’t sure when. He’d need time to digest everything before he found out the truth. 

So he plastered a fake smile to his lips and asked, “Shouldn’t we eat first? Hyungseo-hyung made us a delicious meal that shouldn’t go to waste.”

“I usually eat on the way to uni,” Chanhee explained. Sunwoo noticed he’d stuck with a half-comfortable, half-fashionable outfit - black sweats, a dark hoodie, and a beret that worked nicely with his hair color. As usual, he had a single silver cross earring dangling from his ear. “You can grab some real quick, though, if you want. We’ve still got a couple minutes before we have to go, and I know you need to stay nourished after yesterday.”

“Um, I’ll just eat on the way. As well. Thanks,” Sunwoo said. He inwardly cursed himself for sounding so confused and all over the place. He was making it so obvious something had happened.

But really, who could blame him? He’d just had some horrible news dumped on him without warning.

“Okay, well, why don’t you get ready real quick and then we can leave?”

“Sure, sounds good.”

Sunwoo slipped off the stool and went back to the couch where he grabbed his backpack. He’d packed a couple of things for his morning routine, and he brought them now to the bathroom where he shut and locked the door.

And did nothing but lean on the sink and stare at himself in the mirror.

Chanhee was a cheater. He lied to the people he liked and went for someone better when they came along. What did that mean for Sunwoo?

And was this even true? He didn’t know. Hyungseo could be testing him, for all he cared. Some kind of test, he thought, if it involved making him think Chanhee was unfaithful when he wasn’t. 

But honestly, Hyungseo didn’t seem like the type of person to start that type of drama, especially if he cared for Chanhee as much as he claimed he did.

Which only meant Hyungseo was right and Chanhee was a cheater.

Sunwoo didn’t want his heart to break so soon after it had just been put back together. First Giwook, now Chanhee . . .

Maybe he was never meant to have love.

“Sunwoo-yah, hurry up! We have to go soon!”

Chanhee’s voice jolted Sunwoo out of his stupor, and he quickly brushed his teeth and combed his hair back as best he could. Even after washing his hands he still felt dirty, like he’d stumbled into something he could never get out of.

Or didn’t want to get out of.

He needed to get this figured out soon.

“Sunwoo-yah?” Chanhee asked. Sunwoo heard a knock on the door.

“Coming!” he replied. He dried his hands on the towel in the room, then opened the door and brushed past Chanhee with a tight smile. “Come on, let’s go.”

Sunwoo lifted his backpack off the ground and slung it over his shoulder. He saw Hyungseo waiting for them at the door of the apartment with two containers of food, and when Sunwoo followed Chanhee out the door and accepted the food from Hyungseo, he felt a hand reach out and briefly squeeze his shoulder in sympathy.

It seemed like Hyungseo was telling the truth.

——

The ride to Chanhee’s university was awkward and thick with tension. 

Sunwoo didn’t know what he was supposed to say, or how to keep the conversation going. He continuously picked at the food Hyungseo had given him but he couldn’t stomach more than one or two bites. 

He just didn’t feel like being with Chanhee after the conversation he’d had with Hyungseo.

Unfortunately, his discomfort didn’t go unnoticed by the other boy.

By the time they’d arrived at his university, Chanhee was sitting in the driver’s seat with jaw clenched and eyes narrowed. Sunwoo could see his knuckles were white on the steering wheel.

Crap, he’d just made this whole situation ten times worse.

However, when Chanhee spoke, it was only to announce, “Well, this is it. My university.”

It was breathtaking. White and golden buildings arched into the sky, big glass windows peeked in on students studying, the air was fresh and clear and the grass a pure emerald green. Very well-kept for a university. 

“It’s beautiful,” Sunwoo murmured. “Way better than mine.”

“It’s not the looks that matter,” Chanhee reminded him. “If your university turns out a higher graduating rate than mine, then your university would actually be better than mine.”

He had a bit of a point. “Still, there’s nothing to say against looks. It’s a nice place. Good environment to study.”

“I guess so.” Chanhee’s tone said he wasn’t interested in the conversation - he was just talking to kill the silence between them. “I need to get to my class. Walk with me?”

Under normal circumstances, Sunwoo easily would have said yes. It was a chance to meet Chanhee’s friends, get to know them, learn how Chanhee operated and interacted with people other than his roommates.

But right now was not normal circumstances. Sunwoo didn’t even know if he wanted to meet Chanhee’s friends if Chanhee was a cheater. What kind of friends would he have?

Not good ones for sure. 

Plus, Chanhee had an underlying tone of finality, which told Sunwoo he needed to go with Chanhee to his class or their relationship would end then and there, no matter what happened after today. 

“Okay.”

The two boys clambered out of the car and met on the sidewalk in front of the bumper. Chanhee had his black-and-gray backpack secured over his shoulders. He looked angry.

“It’s not far. Just around this building.” Chanhee pointed at a building that had ‘Library’ scrawled across the front in Korean characters. They were maybe five hundred feet from it. 

Chanhee said nothing more for a while as he lead Sunwoo toward the library. The air between them was suffocating; Sunwoo was so close to running, but he knew he couldn’t. Wouldn’t.

Then, once they’d rounded the building and headed for a smaller, one-story building on the back of campus, Chanhee finally spoke up. “Are you okay?”

That was it? No question about why Sunwoo was practically ignoring him? No demanding to immediately find out what was going on with him? All he asked was for Sunwoo to be okay.

Surely Hyungseo couldn’t be right about Chanhee, if Chanhee was always so open and honest?

Sunwoo didn’t know who he should trust anymore.

“Nothing’s wrong,” he muttered, almost too quietly for Chanhee to hear. “I’m just thinking.”

“You don’t ever think this much, Sun,” Chanhee said.

Sunwoo felt a spike of anger at that. “That was uncalled for. You haven’t been around me enough to know how quiet I get when I think.”

They’d reached the building, but instead of going inside, Chanhee stopped directly outside the doors and smiled sadly at Sunwoo. “See? You’re not even bickering like you normally would have. Something’s wrong.”

Oh. He’d been trying to joke with Sunwoo.

Sunwoo had royally screwed this up.

“I don’t really want to talk about it,” he grumbled after a second. He wasn’t ready to talk to Chanhee yet. Not about cheating, anyway.

“Did Kevin-hyung say something to you?” The question was so forward and so blunt that Sunwoo startled and stared guiltily into Chanhee’s dark eyes. He did not like the look he saw reflecting back at him. For the first time ever, he was genuinely scared of Chanhee. 

Even worse, he saw in Chanhee’s eyes the lies of a cheater. 

Hyungseo had been right. 

“I’m going to kill Kevin,” Chanhee snarled to himself. Sunwoo got the feeling he hadn’t been meant to hear that, but he did, and it only solidified his fears about Chanhee. “Forget about whatever plans we had tonight, Sunwoo. Please go home and leave me alone. I don’t want to be with you right now.”

What? Why was Chanhee doing this? Didn’t he want to justify himself? Didn’t he want to defend himself?

Why wasn’t he explaining anything to Sunwoo?

And then it hit him. 

Chanhee wasn’t defending himself because Hyungseo had been telling the truth. 

Chanhee was a cheater. 

Sunwoo couldn’t trust him.

So Sunwoo backed away, ran away, flew away from that place, from Chanhee and his scathing stare, from the lies he’d been telling. He ran to the car, ripped the door open, grabbed his backpack and fumbled with his phone. He needed to get out of here. He needed someone to come get him.

He pressed the first number he could find. Held the phone to his ear. He could feel his heart frantically beating in his chest and his pulse throbbing in his neck. His head was beginning to hurt.

Why was everything in the world against him? Why couldn’t he find love? Why did it seem like all the guys he liked ended up falling for someone else or cheating on him? Why was he so-

“Sunwoo-yah? Why are you calling me?”

It was Joonyoung. Oh, thank the heavens, it was Joonyoung. Someone level-headed and kind he could spill his fears to and get advice from. 

If there was anyone who could help him sort things out, it was his barista friend and brother.

Sunwoo’s racing heart calmed a bit. “Hyung, where are you?”

Because he didn’t think he could explain everything to Joonyoung over the phone.

“I’m at my apartment, why? Is everything okay?”

“I- No, it’s- I just need-“ He was rambling. Sunwoo needed to form words so Joonyoung could understand what was happening. He took a deep breath. “I need to talk to someone. Now. I-I can’t really explain it over the phone, but I just . . . I need someone to talk to. Please.”

It didn’t take long for Joonyoung’s soothing voice to offer him a solution. “Okay, I hear you, Sun. It sounds like something bad happened and you’re confused about it, so why don’t you come over to my apartment and we can talk. Do you need someone to pick you up?”

The heavens had never created someone better than Joonyoung, Sunwoo was sure of it. How else would the guy be willing to drop everything at Sunwoo’s expense?

The adrenaline and heartache racing through Sunwoo’s veins subsided, and a wave of relief washed through him. He realized he was shaking. 

“Um, yes, yes, I do. I had a ride but he ditched me and I’d rather be with someone I trust right now.”

“All right, I’ll send Haknyeon over to pick you up. Text me your location as soon as we hang up.”

“Okay, thank you, hyung.”

“It’s no problem, Sunwoo. Everything will be all right. Just wait for us, okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, okay, I will.”

Sunwoo had never been more grateful to have Joonyoung as a friend.

——

“Hey, come on in. You can set your stuff by the door right there.”

Joonyoung’s apartment was closer to Chanhee’s university than Sunwoo thought, but it still felt like it took forever for Haknyeon to get there. 

Being alone with his thoughts was not a good thing for Sunwoo.

When Haknyeon had arrived, Sunwoo had asked for silence, and to his utmost gratitude, his wish had been granted.

Haknyeon had said nothing to him the entire ride to Joonyoung’s apartment, only played music softly in the background so there was no dead air between them. The atmosphere had been a little tense, but not nearly as bad as it had been with Chanhee.

Now he stood in the doorway of Joonyoung’s apartment, slipping his shoes and backpack by the door and numbly stepping inside.

All those emotions from earlier, the confusion and bewilderment and utter hurt, had sort of faded into the background and left him an empty mess inside. He felt nothing but everything at the same time, if that was possible, and he wanted to cry or scream or maybe bash his head against a wall.

He just didn’t know what to feel in general.

“Do you want Haknyeonnie here or not?” Joonyoung asked him softly. Youngjae was gone, in class, or hanging out with Felix or something, Sunwoo assumed. It was probably for the best that he not be here. 

In response to Joonyoung, Sunwoo shrugged. “It doesn’t matter to me. I just need to talk to someone or I’ll explode.”

“All right. Why don’t we sit down over here, then, on the couch?” Joonyoung suggested, and wrapped a hand around Sunwoo’s upper arm to lead him to the living room. 

Sunwoo ripped his arm out of his grip. “Please don’t touch me.”

“Okay. I’m sorry.”

Joonyoung and Haknyeon backed away from him to give him some space. They knew Sunwoo always struggled with skinship, and sometimes that struggle intensified when he was experiencing an emotional trauma. Like now, as they were very quickly learning. 

Once they’d all sat - Sunwoo on the recliner and Joonyoung and Haknyeon on the couch - Joonyoung got down to business.

“So what’s going on? Tell us as much as you want, but know that we’ll hear you out in everything you have to say. We’ll do what we can to help.”

Haknyeon nodded agreement. 

Where should Sunwoo start? With liking Chanhee, so Haknyeon had the full story? Or with him staying the night? Or just the part where Chanhee had basically confirmed he’d cheated before?

Well, it would be a mess. But Sunwoo would tell the story and hope they got the gist of it.

“Last night, after you left, Jacob-hyung, I fainted at work.” There was no major reaction from either boy, so Sunwoo assumed both of them must know that by now. “Changmin-hyung is gone on a trip for one of his classes until Thursday morning, so Sangyeon-hyung agreed I should stay with someone so they could watch over me, make sure I didn’t pass out again. 

“I couldn’t stay with you because your apartment was full and you were getting your wrist checked out.” Sunwoo made a mental note in the back of his head to ask Joonyoung about that later. “Sangyeon-hyung didn’t want me to stay in his apartment for his roommate’s sake. In the end, because I’d stayed at their apartment the night before, Chanhee-hyung and Kevin-hyung offered me to stay at their apartment. I accepted.”

“Chanhee is the guy you like, right?” Haknyeon cut in to clarify. Sunwoo nodded confirmation. “Okay, please continue.”

“It went really well. I got there, texted my parents and Changmin-hyung about what had happened, and went to sleep.” He left out the part about sleeping on Chanhee’s lap. “Come morning, everything was fine and I was enjoying chatting with Chanhee-hyung and Kevin-hyung. Chanhee-hyung went to get ready for his classes. That’s when Kevin-hyung told me. He said Chanhee-hyung cheated on his last boyfriend.”

Joonyoung sat back at that, looking rather upset and disgruntled. “That’s a lot to take in.”

“Right?” Sunwoo agreed. “I still went with Chanhee-hyung to his university like we’d planned, but he noticed something was bothering me and pretty much figured out what had happened. He told me he wanted to be alone and asked me to leave, basically confirming what Kevin-hyung said. So I left him, and called you.”

The other two boys were silent for a bit, both of them thoughtful as they thought about how to process the situation and what to say about it. 

Joonyoung spoke first. “Well, I can understand why you’re so distraught and upset. It’s never easy to hear news like that, whether or not it’s true. So thank you for being willing to talk about it, and for being willing to listen to us.” The barista leaned forward, thinking. “There are a couple of things about this situation that are bothering me. First, do you know why Kevin told you this?”

Sunwoo shrugged. “I assume it was for my own safety. He likes me a lot, according to Chanhee-hyung. I think he also wants to see Chanhee-hyung happy, so he’s not going to let someone be with Chanhee-hyung only to watch them leave when they learn the truth.”

“Personally, that’s a warning sign for me on Kevin-ssi’s behalf,” Haknyeon broke in. He hadn’t said much, so Sunwoo was definitely listening to him. “If he’s an overprotective best friend, he might be scaring off any potential suitors until one of them comes back and finds out the  real  truth. If he wants Chanhee-ssi to be happy, he’ll make sure he finds a man for him that will never leave his side. Even if he cheats.”

Hmm. That was an interesting perspective. One that had briefly crossed Sunwoo’s mind, but he hadn’t stopped to think about. 

“You think he’s lying?” he asked. “To see if I’ll come back?”

“I don’t know, Sunwoo-yah. I don’t know any of these people. But there’s a very good possibility that’s what’s going on here.”

“Was Chanhee angry at Kevin?” Joonyoung inquired. “When he figured out what happened?”

Sunwoo blinked. “Actually, yes, he was. Very angry.”

“But he wasn’t angry at you?”

That was a good question. “Come to think of it, I’m not sure he was. He looked so dangerous I ran without saying anything else.”

“If he’s angry at Kevin-ssi but not at you, then it sounds like this is a situation that has happened to him before,” Haknyeon said. “Which means that Kevin-ssi really is weeding out bad potential interests, or he’s not letting Chanhee-ssi speak for himself.”

“And both of those scenarios, Sunwoo-yah,” Jacob said, “don’t have Chanhee as the bad guy.”

Could they be right? Could Sunwoo have been going about this the wrong way? Could he have mistaken everything Chanhee said in his panic to believe Hyungseo and run when he should have stayed?

Because if Haknyeon and Joonyoung were right, Hyungseo was lying to see how Sunwoo would react. Run away? Good. You aren’t worthy of Chanhee. Come back? Now you have a fighting chance.

Sunwoo desperately hoped it were really that simple. 

“The second thing that’s bothering me,” Joonyoung continued after a moment, “is something it sounds like you assumed about Chanhee but didn’t ask him directly.”

Well, there were a lot of things Sunwoo was assuming about Chanhee right now. “And that is?”

“Did Chanhee actually tell you he cheated on his last boyfriend?” Joonyoung questioned.

“Or that he even had a last boyfriend?” Haknyeon broke in.

Sunwoo was at a loss for words. They were so good at analyzing the whole situation, and they hadn’t even been part of it. He was feeling more and more guilty yet more and more hopeful as their conversation went on. 

“No, he didn’t,” Sunwoo admitted. “He just told me to leave and said he didn’t want me there with him anymore.”

“So you really don’t know if he cheated or not,” Joonyoung stated for him. “Which is a very bad thing to assume right now, especially if it’s not true. You should always give the person you like the benefit of the doubt. It’s how you build trust in any relationship.”

“Besides, him pushing you away doesn’t seem normal for someone in love,” Haknyeon explained. “Everybody I know would fight to keep the one they liked by their side. Which tells me there’s something very odd going on here.”

“If Kevin-ssi has done this before, Sun, and he succeeded in making all of Chanhee’s former interests disappear without a trace, then that could potentially explain Chanhee’s actions,” Joonyoung said. He carefully reached out and rubbed a hand over Sunwoo’s arm. Sunwoo didn’t protest, which was good - the red-head was listening and calming down. “He could be thinking something along the lines of: ‘Everybody else Kevin lied to has ditched me without giving me a chance to explain. I might as well push Sunwoo away too, before I get hurt again.’”

Sunwoo had a lot to think about. Joonyoung and Haknyeon had always been perceptive when it came to people, so there was a chance they were right. 

If so, then Sunwoo had made a huge mistake and he needed to fix it before he hurt Chanhee and himself over something that wasn’t even true.

He’d also need to have a talk with Hyungseo about finding a better way to protect his best friend. The way he was approaching things now was plain wrong.

On the other hand, if Sunwoo’s suspicions had been correct, going after Chanhee might make things worse. He’d stir up something that didn’t need to be stirred, and emotions would pour all over the place.

But ultimately, at this point, he didn’t know the truth. And until he did, he didn’t want to leave Chanhee alone.

“We could be completely wrong, Sunwoo-yah,” Haknyeon interrupted softly. He was giving Sunwoo such a supportive, fond look. “We definitely don’t want to rule that out. In fact, chances are you’re right about this whole thing and Chanhee-ssi really did cheat on his old boyfriend. Going after Chanhee-ssi in that case could get you hurt even worse.”

“It’s ultimately up to you, Sun,” Joonyoung murmured. “Tell is what you’re feeling right now.”

Sunwoo latched his hand in Joonyoung’s for emotional and physical support; the fingers that brushed over his knuckles as soon as he did sent waves of calming reassurance rushing through him.

No matter what he decided, he’d always have Joonyoung on his side.

“I’m confused,” he began. “And hurt and frustrated and angry. I’m scared to approach him because what if he did cheat? Then I’ll know. But what if he didn’t, and I don’t go after him? I might lose my only chance to ever find true love. And thinking about either one of those hurts me more than I could ever imagine.”

Joonyoung squeezed Sunwoo’s hand gently, as a signal for Sunwoo to look him in the eyes. Sunwoo did. “Do you still like him? After everything you just learned, do you still like him?”

Did he? It was hard to tell. After Giwook hurt him so recently, and now he was finding out Chanhee might have done the same thing to his previous boyfriend . . . it was hard to tell what he felt for the pink haired boy.

But when he thought about that smile, the sunlight dancing off pink hair and flashing on ivory-white teeth, the giggles and the touches that sent his heart aflutter, the way he always looked forward to seeing Chanhee no matter where he was or what had happened . . . 

It was easy to tell.

He couldn’t deny what he felt no matter how much he wanted to.

“Yes,” he breathed. “I still like him. A lot.”

“Then wouldn’t you rather know for sure, than spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been? Wouldn’t you rather know than make the biggest mistake you could possibly imagine?” Haknyeon whispered. “If you love him, Sunwoo, then hearing the truth is the least you can do to show him how much he means to you.”

They were right.

Sunwoo couldn’t live in denial. He couldn’t lose this chance to have a happy ending. He couldn’t lose this opportunity to experience a genuine, life-long love. 

He couldn’t lose Chanhee.

No. 

He  _wouldn’t_. 

——

It was eight thirty in the evening.

Sunwoo was either about to hear the best news of his life, or the worst news of his life.

He was about to walk into Chanhee’s apartment and ask him for the truth.

After speaking with Joonyoung and Haknyeon, he’d decided to act as soon as he could. Waiting would only prolong the torture to his heart, and he would rather find out the truth and accept it now than wait until he was so fragile he’d never recover. 

Chanhee’s answer tonight would determine what would happen to their relationship.

And no matter how nervous he was or what the outcome might be, Sunwoo was ready for the truth. 

He had to be. Or he’d regret this for the rest of his life.

_Be gentle_ ,  Joonyoung had told him,  _ but be firm. Make it clear that he has a chance, one chance, to come clean about everything. And if he doesn’t, he’ll never hear from you again.  _

Here went nothing.

Sunwoo raised his fist and rapped smartly against Chanhee’s door. When he heard footsteps drawing nearer, his heart started pounding out of his chest and he could hear his breathing pick up. His palms were sweaty. 

He nearly backed out. 

He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t face Chanhee. He couldn’t face the possibility of a life without the boy with the pink hair. Sunwoo just knew he’d die if he found out Chanhee had really cheated. Two rejections in less than a week - Sunwoo wasn’t sure he’d ever recover.

But before Sunwoo could play chicken and race back down the hall, the door swung open to reveal Hyunjae.

Almost immediately, Sunwoo could hear the distant shouting coming from the back of the apartment. 

That couldn’t be good.

To his surprise, Hyunjae didn’t glare at him or yell at him or tell him to go away. Instead, the older man seemed genuinely surprised. Or relieved. Maybe both. 

Whatever the case, Sunwoo knew Hyunjae wasn’t turning him away tonight.

“I’m not sure now is a good time to be here, Sunwoo-yah,” the blond said quietly. “Kevin and Chanhee are going at it in Kevin’s bedroom.”

This news was a bit of a confirmation for Sunwoo. Something was going on between those two, and he’d been caught up between it. If they were fighting it out now, he’d come at the perfect time. 

“No, this is the best time to be here,” he snapped firmly. Hyunjae’s eyes widened in shock at the tone of voice Sunwoo used. Obviously not used to people being so unyielding in serious situations. “Let me in. I need to talk to Chanhee-hyung, now. I won’t let it wait.”

He walked inside without waiting for Hyunjae’s permission.

“Sunwoo, I don’t think there’s anything you can do to help,” Hyunjae said. He was practically jogging to keep up with the angry strides taking Sunwoo to the back of the apartment. “Kevin won’t budge even if you threaten him.”

Oh, so Hyunjae had something to do with this too. That, or this had happened before and he’d been there when it had occurred.

Sunwoo halted mid-step to pivot on Hyunjae. “If you know anything about this situation, tell me right now.”

His tone held no option for backing out.

A frightened, knowing look flitted over Hyunjae’s face. “They’re talking about you. Chanhee wants to go after you but Kevin won’t let him because you ran. Running means you’re not worthy of Chanhee’s love anymore.”

“Then I’ll tell him I didn’t run,” Sunwoo snapped. “I just needed time to think. Like any normal person would.”

“Sunwoo-“

“Don’t try to dissuade me, Hyunjae-hyung. I’m not going to lose Chanhee-hyung until I know I have a reason to.”

There was no arguing with that, and Hyunjae must have caught that drift. He opened and closed his mouth once, twice in his rush to say something to Sunwoo. But in the end he admitted defeat and stepped aside to allow Sunwoo to go find Chanhee.

And find Chanhee Sunwoo did. Except, when he heard the loud voices lashing out at each other from the farthest bedroom, he hid just outside the doorway to hear what they had to say.

To hear the truth - if Chanhee had been cheating or not.

“- you hate me?” Chanhee was screeching. It sounded like he’d been crying, and Sunwoo’s heart clenched at the thought. “I’m so sick of you running my love life and chasing away every possible suitor I have! When are you going to let me decide for myself who I want to love?”

“I’m just trying to protect you, Chanhee!” Hyungseo. “After what happened with Yoonseok, I want to make sure that the guy you fall in love with won’t leave you - for  any  reason!”

There was a sudden deathly silence that followed the words, and Sunwoo was just about to step in and break it up, when Chanhee said something that made his blood run cold and his heart shatter.

“That’s harsh, Kevin Moon. That’s harsh. Yoonseok didn’t  _ leave  _ me. He  _died_.  And you think you can protect me from that? Whether or not I fall in love with someone who leaves me in the end, they’re still going to die one way or another.”

Suddenly, Sunwoo understood everything. He understood the truth, he understood the situation, and he understood why Hyungseo would lie about Chanhee. 

He understood why Hyungseo and Hyunjae were so protective of Chanhee. It wasn’t just because they were best friends, no, it was because Chanhee had been hurt beyond repair by something in his past, and they wanted to protect the fragile state of his heart.

Any anger Sunwoo might have possibly had at Hyungseo fled away as he exhaled sharply. Yes, Hyungseo might have been foolish to keep Chanhee from finding happiness again, someone to turn his mind away from whatever had happened with Yoonseok. But he’d also been looking out for Chanhee and making sure his best friend got nothing but the best for the rest of his life.

Hyungseo had devised a plan so that the one person who could give Chanhee happiness again would return no matter what rumors, lies, or truths were told about the pink haired boy. So that they’d keep Chanhee happy forever.

“I know, Chanhee-yah,” Hyungseo murmured. His voice had drastically softened. “That’s why I’m doing this - to make sure you find someone who will never leave you until death takes you. Someone that you can have good memories with. All those guys who ran away after I told them you cheated? They were never going to last. I was just saving you the pain of another heartbreak.”

So Joonyoung and Hyungseo had been right. Hyungseo had lied to Sunwoo to test him. Honestly kind of rude, but Sunwoo was ever so glad he’d come back to give Chanhee another chance.

“But those guys you drove away were the good ones!” Chanhee was shouting again. “Who in their right mind would want to date a cheater? Who wants to stick around when the guy they like is impure? They’re the good ones because they’re the ones who would remain faithful in a relationship!”

Oof, Chanhee had a very good point there. Good relationships involved faithful partners - and faithful partners wouldn’t stick around for a cheating partner. Hyungseo truly was jinxing Chanhee’s love life.

“The truly good ones wouldn’t have left after  _ I  _ told them,” Hyungseo growled, “they would have left after  _ you  _ told them. A truly good man would come to you and hear you out before leaving you over a rumor that wasn’t confirmed. Those guys would have left you as soon as a real rumor like that came along. They aren’t right for you. And neither is Sunwoo.”

Okay, hurtful. What did Hyungseo know about Sunwoo? Hadn’t the older man been promised just that morning that Sunwoo was going to wait and ask Chanhee for his side of the story? Why then was he saying Sunwoo had left? 

To make Chanhee lose hope? Or because he didn’t understand that Sunwoo would need time to put his thoughts together?

Or perhaps, in retrospect, Hyungseo wasn’t willing to give Chanhee hope on the chance that Sunwoo really didn’t come back. It would be the best way to ease the pain.

“Sunwoo left because I asked him to,” Chanhee spat out, “not because you told him a lie. He came with me to my university and he was going to hear me out, but I told him to leave because he seemed to believe you.” There was a long silence after he spoke; maybe because Hyungseo didn’t believe what Chanhee was saying, or maybe because this was the first time Chanhee had thrown someone away because of Hyungseo.

“You told him to leave?” was the only thing the Canadian could whisper out. “And you want him to come back? Chanhee-yah, I don’t think I’m the one who messed up here. You are.”

“Stop blaming this on me!” Chanhee was crying, a full-on sob tearing from his mouth and wrenching the air. Sunwoo nearly ran inside the room right then and there, but he barely managed to refrain from doing so. He needed to hear what Chanhee had to say about him. “I told him to leave because I knew he would! Every time you tell them to leave, they do, and I could see it in his eyes! As soon as I went to class he was going to run! So I just saved myself the pain and sorrow and did it for him. I told him to leave. And just like I thought, he did.”

“Then he wasn’t right for you,” Hyungseo said firmly. Sunwoo could picture him firmly grasping Chanhee’s shoulders. “If he left you just like that, he’s not right for you.”

Another sob rent the air, this time a little quieter. Chanhee’s voice was shaky when he next spoke. “Sunwoo was different, though. He was different. He really seemed to want to make it work.”

Uh, yeah, for sure he did. Someone like Chanhee? Yeah, Sunwoo would definitely do everything in his power to make sure things worked out between them.

That was why he was here, wasn’t it?

“And yet he still ran out on you the moment he heard something bad about you,” Hyungseo murmured. “Clearly, he only wanted to make it work to a certain extent. Just forget about him, okay? He’s just like those other guys and he’s never coming back.”

If Sunwoo weren’t positive Hyungseo was only saying that to squash any hope Chanhee had in case Sunwoo really didn’t come back, he would have marched in there and slapped Hyungseo across the face. Honestly, how could the guy say something like that when he’d only known Sunwoo for two days.

It was when Sunwoo realized that Chanhee had given in and was done responding that he determined it was time to prove Hyungseo wrong.

Those terrible, ugly sobs coming from Chanhee needed to end, and Sunwoo knew how. He just hoped he’d have another chance with Chanhee after they talked it out tonight. 

Sunwoo stepped around the corner of the wall to see Chanhee wrapped up in Hyungseo’s arms, completely limp against his best friend. Like he’d completely given up on even standing on his own. How many times had this happened before?

And Hyungseo was just standing there in the middle of the room, holding his roommate and caressing his back with the saddest sort of look on his face. No, he hadn’t meant to hurt Chanhee this much, but to him it had been the right thing to do. There was no way Sunwoo could hold a grudge against him seeing that Hyungseo, in the end, had only wanted the best for his friend.

The red-head gave them a moment to themselves, let Chanhee cry most of it out. Then he leaned against the doorway, arms crossed, and stated, “You know, the horrible thing about you, Kevin-hyung, is that you never assumed I wanted to think about what to say to Chanhee-hyung when I got back. You can’t say something like that to me and expect me to not sort my thoughts out.”

Hyungseo and Chanhee both startled and jumped apart when they heard the voice cut into the stillness around them. Both their eyes were wide as they stared at him hovering in the doorway - Hyungseo bearing an expression of surprise and Chanhee wearing a look that was a mixture of disbelief and ultimate relief.

Chanhee looked terrible, after bawling his eyes out. His cheeks were flushed pink and his nose was red and swollen, with a little wetness from the mucus. His eyes were puffy and bloodshot from the mountain of tears that had cascaded down his cheeks. 

“You came back,” the pink haired boy gasped, almost breathlessly. Sunwoo could tell from his expression it hadn’t quite dawned on him yet that Sunwoo wasn’t going to ditch him like all those other guys. 

Hyungseo repeated Chanhee’s words, but his tone held more of a satisfied, bluntly stated acceptance. “You came back.”

“No thanks to you,” Sunwoo snapped at Hyungseo, then completely ignored the older man in favor of stepping over to Chanhee and grabbing his hands. They were cold as ice. “I told Kevin-hyung I wouldn’t leave you until I’d heard you out, but I guess he forgot to tell you that.”

“You came back,” Chanhee breathed out again. It seemed to be the only thing he could say at the moment. 

“I did,” Sunwoo reiterated. He gently pulled Chanhee toward him and led the disoriented boy through the door into the hallway. “Now what say we go somewhere private and talk? I want to hear your side of the story.”

It must have finally hit Chanhee that Sunwoo had returned for good, for he stopped the red-head in the middle of the hallway and suddenly fell against him with a quiet sniff. His hands came up to fist into Sunwoo’s sweatshirt, and he brought his head close to Sunwoo’s neck to wet it with a fresh round of tears. Sunwoo practically had to hold Chanhee up with how weak and limp he had become in his arms.

But he didn’t mind, because at least the now-soft sobs and his quickly dampening shirt meant he  had the boy in his arms again. 


	6. Making Amends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE TAKE NOTE THIS IS THE TRIGGER CHAPTER. There will be mentions of a past suicide, thoughts of suicide, and mentions of a past suicide attempt. If any of the above make you uncomfortable, I urge you to read only the second half of this chapter. Once you get to the little line toward the bottom of the chapter signaling a new scene, you should be safe. 
> 
> Sunwoo and Chanhee talk things out. There may or may not be a first kiss *wink wink*

Half an hour later, Sunwoo and Chanhee sat on a bench outside a clothes store. They’d chosen not to go to Sangyeon’s café because there would be too many people there they knew and they didn’t want to be interrupted. 

Here, it was quieter, and as it was nearly nine fifteen at night, there was far less foot traffic. They could be alone to figure out the situation and mend whatever crack had formed in their relationship.

They sat close to each other, shoulders brushing and knees bumping in the partially chilly night. Nothing had been said between them yet as Sunwoo gave Chanhee time to calm down and gather his thoughts. Whatever needed to be said would be said soon enough, and that was all Sunwoo wanted.

A slight breeze wafted in every few minutes. It blew Sunwoo’s hair in his eyes and made him reach up to brush it away with a slight flick of his wrist. For a while, that was the only movement between the two of them.

Even the stars muffled the sounds of the road in the distance. The shining orbs were twinkling in the darkening sky and permeating the dying golden-red hues of the sunset with sprinkles of white. 

Everything was so beautiful, and Sunwoo kind of wished he could stay out here forever.

“What did Kevin-hyung tell you?”

Chanhee finally broke the perfection of the night with the sound of his quiet, gentle voice. He sounded a little strained, confused.

Sunwoo didn’t blame him.

“That you cheated on your last boyfriend,” he answered honestly, voice just as quiet. It seemed wrong, somehow, to speak louder.

There was another long gap of silence. Then, “A lot of people would say he was right.”

This surprised Sunwoo. Had Hyungseo actually been telling the truth, just in the form of a test, and Sunwoo had misunderstood what Chanhee had been saying to him? Because Sunwoo wouldn’t stick around if Chanhee cheated on the men he liked. 

“What?” he asked. 

The boy in question shifted until he was staring up at the sky with his arms draped over his thighs. It was the first time he’d moved since they’d sat down. “Most people would consider what I did to Yoonseok cheating. But it’s not really cheating, is it, when I had his permission?”

His voice held a tinge of desperation - like he’d told someone this story before and they’d walked out on him. Or maybe because people didn’t believe him and called him a cheater when he didn’t consider himself one.

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t,” Sunwoo replied softly. A couple walked by them, holding hands and laughing soundlessly. “But I can’t know for sure until I have the context of the story.”

“Then I’ll tell you what happened,” Chanhee said. He was fidgeting with his hands anxiously, poking at his palms and rubbing them together as he stared anywhere but at Sunwoo. A subtle sign of how nervous he was about this conversation.

“Take your time,” Sunwoo urged quietly. 

“Thanks,” Chanhee murmured. He took another moment to gather his thoughts together, then began. “Five years ago, when I was a sophomore in high school, I met Yoonseok. He was kind of an outcast at our school, a nerd, a weirdo, if you will. He was also horribly depressed.” 

Thinking about Chanhee reminding Hyungseo that Yoonseok had died, Sunwoo could already see where this was going. And he felt absolutely wretched for Chanhee. What kind of trauma he must have been through.

“I liked him anyway,” Chanhee continued. “I’m not even sure why. He just made me feel important, and I’d never felt that way before. So a year into our friendship, I asked him if he’d date me. He said yes. During the first few months of our relationship, his depression seemed to be going into remission, and we were both really, really happy. Really happy. We thought nothing would ever separate us.”

Sunwoo could relate. He’d felt the same way about Giwook. 

“Then he started getting worse, fast. He couldn’t stop self-harming or talking about hanging himself or constantly laying around complaining about how sad he felt. We tried everything we could to help him - going on more dates, signing him up for therapy, even having him take pills, which I monitored twenty-four seven. Nothing worked.

“Then one day, he sat me down and told me he felt like he was breaking. I was worried so I let him cry on me and tell me everything he was feeling, and it was hours before the episode was over. That was also the day I got the feeling that never really went away - the feeling that he’d be leaving me in the next few months.”

Chanhee was beginning to shake, and it wasn’t because of the biting wind. Sunwoo risked stretching an arm out and wrapping it around Chanhee’s shoulders, the way Chanhee had done for him the night before. He smiled sadly when the pink haired boy leaned back into him.

“I asked Yoonseok a few days later if I could start having sex with someone else since he wasn’t mentally able to. I told him it was because I was sexually frustrated, but really it was because I wanted to force myself to fall in love with someone else. Then it wouldn’t hurt as much when he died.”

Chanhee’s voice choked on the last sentence, and he sounded close to crying again. But Sunwoo didn’t care. From what he guessed was coming, Chanhee deserved to cry for the rest of eternity.

“He gave me his permission, and I quickly found someone else to help me drown out my emotions toward Yoonseok. I started spending less time with him, stopped having deep talks with him, and eventually broke off from him completely. I thought I’d solved my problem.

“Then, a week later, I got a text from one of my closest friends asking me to check on Yoonseok. He hadn’t been answering any of his texts or calls and had missed his classes. I knew even before I made it to his apartment that I wasn’t going to find him alive.”

Chanhee was shaking so much in Sunwoo’s arms that the latter was getting worried. He reached out with his free hand and took one of Chanhee’s in his own. Almost immediately, Chanhee’s fingers crushed his in a grip so tight Sunwoo started to lose feeling in his index finger. 

“The door was unlocked,” Chanhee whispered. His eyes were squeezed shut as he relived the memory in his mind. “The TV was still on, and there were candy wrappers all over the table. His phone was on the kitchen counter, untouched. I looked through the entire house for him but he wasn’t anywhere, and I was getting worried that I might have missed him.” He paused, swallowing thickly. “Then I found his body on the bathroom floor.”

The hand in Sunwoo’s was bruising his fingers. Chanhee’s breath hitched so loudly Sunwoo was positive Chanhee was about to go into cardiac arrest right there. He didn’t, but Sunwoo wasn’t any less worried.

“You don’t have to go on,” Sunwoo whispered in his ear. “I know what happened. I believe you. You don’t have to keep going.”

Chanhee’s hair tickled his chin as the boy looked up into his eyes. The most trusting and loving look Sunwoo had ever been given stared up at him from those dark abysses reflecting the stars. Sunwoo’s heart nearly stopped.

“I want to keep going,” Chanhee whispered back, his breath tickling Sunwoo’s nose. “If it’s for you, Kim Sunwoo, I want to keep going forever.”

The weight behind those words was deep and meaningful. Chanhee wasn’t just talking about the story - he was talking about his love, his trust . . . his life. He was admitting that he’d been so close to giving up himself after Yoonseok committed suicide - was admitting he’d almost committed suicide himself. 

Admitting that Sunwoo had been his last chance to find happiness before he followed in Yoonseok’s footsteps, and he’d found it. In a savage, indifferent, uncaring boy, he’d found all the happiness he needed.

He’d walked into that café because the look he’d seen on Sunwoo’s face had been the same one he’d seen on Yoonseok’s just before he’d committed suicide. 

He’d gone in there to save Sunwoo, but instead, Sunwoo had saved him. 

Or rather, Sunwoo reflected, when taking into consideration everything he had gone through recently as well . . . 

They’d saved each other.

They were meant for each other, and after tonight, they would never let anything come between them again. For any reason.

“Then tell me,” Sunwoo whispered back. “I’ll always listen.”

A shiver passed through Chanhee’s body, and his hand in Sunwoo’s slackened. He stopped shaking as he pressed up into Sunwoo’s chest. Hearing those words from Sunwoo, and the promise behind them, had freed him from his past once and for all.

“I found Yoonseok in the bathroom,” he murmured. His voice was steadier now, calmer. “There was blood all over the floor from where he’d slit his wrists, and his neck was snapped from where he’d hit it on the counter. I knew without a doubt he was already dead, but I called an ambulance anyway and they took him away. The doctors at the hospital officially pronounced him dead.

“In the next few months, it became clear that cheating on him had done nothing to soothe the pain. It actually hurt even worse, because I’d missed the last week of his life and I felt responsible for being the one who sent him over the edge. There were two or three times I seriously considered taking my own life because I didn’t see how I could live without him. Once I even put the pills in my mouth and was ready to swallow them without hesitation.

“That was when a stranger, someone I’d never met before, walked in on me and immediately forced me to spit them out. He sat with me for hours just to be a comforting presence and to make sure I didn’t try again. We talked. He told me his story and the people who’d helped him through his own difficult times, and he offered to help me. I let him. He became one of the most important people in my life.”

It was so eye-opening hearing about Chanhee’s past and learning what he’d struggled with. It wasn’t easy to hear or to process, but Sunwoo had one single guess as to who that person was that saved Chanhee’s life.

“That stranger was Kevin-hyung, wasn’t it?” he asked.

The nod against his chin was all Sunwoo needed for confirmation.

And suddenly, his respect for Hyungseo increased a hundredfold. He’d never have pictured Hyungseo as the type of person to butt in on a stranger’s personal life, but his overprotection for Chanhee made so much sense now and Sunwoo felt bad for even being angry with him.

Hyungseo would never let harm come to Chanhee, not after what the two of them had been through - and Sunwoo knew that being a permanent part of Chanhee’s life also meant letting Hyungseo be a permanent part of his life. The two of them were packaged together, inseparable. 

And if Hyungseo had been the one to save Chanhee, Sunwoo would gladly accept the older man into his life without question. 

“I met Hyunjae-hyung a few months later at a bar,” Chanhee said. “I was trying to drink my sorrows away since I couldn’t kill myself, but I don’t hold alcohol well and I was so close to passing out and going to the hospital that he finally stepped in. Paid my tab, tried to contact my friends, and took me to his apartment when none of them picked up. He took care of me the next morning when I woke up horribly hungover.”

It was amazing, how the pieces of the puzzle were fitting together. How Hyungseo and Hyunjae had become Chanhee’s best friends because they’d both saved him from doing something stupid and losing his life. How they’d formed a fast bond that would never break as a result. And most importantly, how kind and caring Hyungseo and Hyunjae were underneath their savage, silly exteriors.

Sunwoo should really learn to appreciate them more. 

“It’s taken me a while to get over Yoonseok,” Chanhee finished up, “and I still have days where I really miss him and regret not joining him. But I’ve been doing better with Hyunjae-hyung’s and Kevin’s-hyung’s help.” He paused to flick his eyes up to Sunwoo’s. “Funny thing though. I haven’t thought about him once since I met you.”

Sunwoo couldn’t help but smile down at Chanhee, feeling as if one of those stars had fallen from the sky and lit up his heart. He couldn’t believe Chanhee had chosen him, of all people, to love, and that he had been the one to pull Chanhee out of the dark hole of his past and bring him to the light.

That they’d found each other in this messed-up world, right when they’d needed each other.

Right when they’d both been about to give up.

They couldn’t be happier to have each other.

“You didn’t cheat,” Sunwoo breathed into Chanhee’s ear. Despite the fact that Chanhee was still snuggled up into his grip, he felt the faintest sigh of relief escape the pink-haired boy. 

Sunwoo heard a nearly inaudible, “Thank you. You have no idea how much that means to me.”

“Maybe not,” Sunwoo replied. “And I’ll probably never understand how much you hurt and miss Yoonseok. But just know that I do understand what it’s like to lose someone you loved over something that you can’t help.”

Chanhee sucked in a breath at that; his body quickly turned until the older boy was facing Sunwoo with sorrowful, widened eyes. There was also a deep pain hidden in his gaze that warmed Sunwoo because he knew that pain was for him. 

“I hate that you understand,” Chanhee said. “But at the same time I’m glad you do, because now I know I can always talk to you.” He paused. “May I ask what happened?”

This would be difficult, but if Chanhee could tell him about Yoonseok, Sunwoo could easily tell Chanhee about Giwook.

He held his arm open again as a request for Chanhee to snuggle back up to him before he started. Thankfully, Chanhee did. 

“I was a year younger than you, actually, a freshman in high school,” he started. “This guy, Giwook-hyung, and I were in a band together as rappers. We did practically everything together, and as a result ended up dating each other for several years. When the end of our senior year came and we were accepted into different colleges, we knew things would change a lot.

“So we promised each other we would never rap again until the day we debuted together with a band in which we were lovers. Well, that promise seemed like it would happen for a year or so; and then, as time went on, I stopped getting texts and calls from him.”

The hand that had been in Sunwoo’s returned with a gentle squeeze of support. 

“I thought it was just because Giwook-hyung was busy, so I didn’t think much of it. Until he called me one day and told me he was breaking up with me. He never told me why, just said it would never work and he didn’t want to get back together ever again.

“Naturally, I was heartbroken. I cried for a long time afterwards and struggled to care about anything other than the pain in my heart. But right after he broke up with me, I got the job at Sangyeon-hyung’s café, and he and my coworkers slowly broke me down until I wasn’t so deep in my own emotions.

“I thought that was the end of it until last week when Giwook-hyung showed up at my dorm room offering me to join his band,” Sunwoo announced.

He felt Chanhee startle in his grip. “Last week? He showed up last  _ week _ ?”

“Yeah, it was real great of him after completely ignoring me for a year,” Sunwoo stated sarcastically. He heard Chanhee inhale sharply in anger. “Anyway, I seriously considered joining the band because this was what we had promised each other back in high school. However, it soon became clear that things would be too awkward between us - he had a new boyfriend who just so happened to be part of his new band. He’d completely destroyed our dream and replaced me with someone else.”

“Wait,” Chanhee interrupted, flailing his hands, “so he never told you why he dumped you, then showed up at your dorm room  _ a year later  _ to tell you he had a new boyfriend?”

“Something like that,” Sunwoo shrugged. He’d been trying to forget about it. “From what I can tell, his new boyfriend is the reason he broke up with me. He seemed really happy, but it kind of stirred up old memories I didn’t want, so he didn’t stay long.”

Chanhee had backed away from Sunwoo to stare at him with wide eyes. Something was deeply unsettling him about Sunwoo’s story, and Sunwoo didn’t know why until the older boy spoke.

“He cheated on you,” Chanhee gasped. “Oh my god, he cheated you, and Kevin-hyung told you I cheated on my last boyfriend.” 

He was starting to unravel, limbs flailing all over the place, so Sunwoo grabbed his hands and held them still. They locked eyes. A deep guilt and apology rested in Chanhee’s honey irises.

“I can’t believe this,” Chanhee sniffed. “It’s no wonder you ran away from me this morning! Kevin-hyung told you I’d cheated on my last boyfriend and you’d literally just found out  _ last week  _ that your old boyfriend cheated on you. You probably wanted nothing to do with me.”

Now that he said it so clearly, Sunwoo realized it was true. Half the reason he’d been so affected by the news from Hyungseo was because he’d just heard the same news from his ex.

Funny how things worked like that.

“But you came back,” Chanhee said softly. Now his eyes were filled with a soft wonder. “Why did you come back, when you were already so afraid of reliving the past?”

“You’re not the past,” Sunwoo said. “And you’re not Giwook-hyung either. I figured you had a right to explain the truth to me before I left you forever. I’ve heard too many stories where relationships were destroyed because someone believed an untrue rumor, and I wasn’t going to let that happen to us. You mean too much to me.”

A smile flitted over Chanhee’s lips. Their entwined hands spread a comfortable warmth between them, a shared bond and experience. Chanhee rubbed his thumbs over Sunwoo’s knuckles. 

“Thank you,” he murmured. “For listening to me.”

“And you as well,” Sunwoo smiled back.

They stayed like that for a while, content with holding each other’s hands and smiling happily at each other, knowing that neither of them would be leaving tonight. It was a pleasant, indescribable joy that thumped in both of their hearts and brought them back to life, knowing that they’d both found love again after their past experiences.

Then, after a few minutes, Chanhee released a heavy sigh and scooted closer to Sunwoo until he could rest against him again. They kept one hand interlocked. 

“You must be hurting so much more than I am,” Chanhee mused into the quiet air. The distant sound of a car horn pierced the night. 

Sunwoo was confused by his statement. After everything they’d just talked about, everything he’d just told Sunwoo, he was saying  that?  “What are you talking about? Hyung, your boyfriend  _died_. ”

Another silence lulled the air to sleep. Chanhee had begun playing with Sunwoo’s fingers to keep himself occupied while he thought. “At least, when he died, I knew he still loved me,” he said after a moment. “Knowing that makes it easier to bear.”

Hmm. Chanhee had a bit of a point. Though Sunwoo still suspected that Chanhee was hurting much more inside than he was. 

“Well, I did realize one thing,” Sunwoo said. “By leaving me, Gi Wook-hyung made the biggest mistake of his life.”

“Why? Because he could never do better than you?” Chanhee asked.

“No,” Sunwoo smiled, and squeezed Chanhee’s hand, “because he gave me a chance to do better than him.”

At the gentle words, Chanhee turned to wrap his arms around Sunwoo’s waist and bury his nose in the younger boy’s neck. His legs he swung over Sunwoo’s until he was all but sitting on the red-head’s lap. 

They were very comfortable, homely. Sunwoo would take Chanhee over Giwook any day. He’d never been this happy before in his life.

Quiet fell over them once again. The sun had set and the stars were shining to their fullest, casting a hue over the sidewalk that made Chanhee’s hair glow silver in the moonlight. Other than a car or two passing every now and then and the pulsing chirping of crickets, everything was pleasantly silent. 

“Sunwoo-yah, do you think Kevin-hyung was wrong to do that to me?” Chanhee questioned softy. “To drive away all the guys I like before I had a chance to explain?”

“Well, when you put it that way, yes,” Sunwoo said. “But when you think about his motive for doing it, I think he’s not so wrong.”

“What do you mean?”

“If he were doing it out of pure jealously, then he’d be in the wrong,” Sunwoo explained. “But ask yourself this: if you had gotten together with any one of those previous guys, and you’d told them months or years down the road what Kevin-hyung told them, would you have survived? Would you have been able to continue living when they left you?”

Chanhee fell silent as he considered Sunwoo’s words and analyzed himself and how he would have reacted. It was a heavy question for him to consider, to even think about what could have happened if Hyungseo hadn’t stepped in. Then, after he’d come to a conclusion, he released a quiet, “No. I wouldn’t have.”

“I think Kevin-hyung knew that,” Sunwoo murmured. “He knew how fragile your heart was and that you’d kill yourself if any one of those guys left you. So he made them leave before they could break you completely and he lost you forever. He really wasn’t trying to hurt you, hyung. He was saving you.”

“And as a result, I have you,” Chanhee said. He reached one hand up to stroke through the hair on the back of Sunwoo’s head. “So really, I can’t complain. He really did find the best guy for me.”

A flood of warmth crashed into Sunwoo’s chest, and he nuzzled his nose into the top of Chanhee’s head. That now-familiar smell of lavender filled his senses. He honestly couldn’t remember the last time he’d had this much physical contact with someone, yet he also couldn’t remember the last time he’d enjoyed it so much.

He was so lucky to have Chanhee all to himself. He wouldn’t throw away this chance to date the most wonderful guy in existence.

“Chanhee-hyung?” he asked. Even though he knew Chanhee liked him back and would most definitely say yes, his heart still pounded out of his chest in nervous anxiety. It was never easy to ask a question that had ‘No’ as an option.

When Chanhee lifted his head and let out a little “Hmm?”, Sunwoo told himself to get over his fear and just ask the question already.

“Will you go on a date with me?”

The biggest, most beautiful, most radiant smile Sunwoo had ever seen lifted Chanhee’s lips and filled the darkness with a light brighter than the stars shining above them. Chanhee practically strangled Sunwoo with the force of his hug.

Sunwoo would go through all the hurt and pain of the day a thousand times again if it meant he got to see that smile just one more time. Fortunately for him, he’d be able to see much more in the future. 

He’d fallen in love with the only perfect person in the world.

“I never thought you’d ask,” Chanhee grinned, loosening his grip around Sunwoo’s middle. “Yes, Kim Sunwoo. I will go on a date with you.”

There were no words that could describe how Sunwoo felt in that moment. ‘Happy’ didn’t even come close.

“When should we have our date?” he asked. He felt as giddy as a kid on Christmas Day. “And where? Any ideas?”

“How about tomorrow? I only have one class and you’re taking tomorrow off, so we should have plenty of time together,” Chanhee suggested.

“Perfect,” Sunwoo agreed. “Where do you want to go?”

“I’d prefer something casual, if that’s okay,” Chanhee said. He received confirmation from Sunwoo. “Why don’t we just go to Sangyeon-hyung’s café and have a coffee date? And we can walk in the park or go clothes shopping or watch a movie afterwards or something.”

Wow, Chanhee was good at this. Sunwoo had a feeling he’d never be bored of going on dates with him.

“I guess we could see what we feel like doing tomorrow,” Sunwoo decided. “And if we can’t decide on something, we can always do both of our suggestions.”

Chanhee leaned back to smile at Sunwoo and pinch his cheeks. He still had his legs over Sunwoo’s, but surprisingly it hadn’t become uncomfortable yet. Yet another sign that he was meant for Sunwoo.

“You’re good at this,” Chanhee laughed. “Compromise to be safe. What time do you wanna meet up?”

“When does your class end?”

“At two. But honestly, I might just skip it so we can have the day to ourselves. I’m not concerned about it anyway - I have a nearly perfect grade in that class.”

Sunwoo pushed his bottom lip out in a pout. “You shouldn’t skip class.”

“I know how you feel about skipping class,” Chanhee reassured him. He finally shifted after a long while to pull his legs underneath him and lean on Sunwoo’s shoulder. Sunwoo’s legs were no longer trapped. “But you’re more important to me than some stupid classes. Besides, I think I deserve some time alone with you after everything that happened today.”

Yeah, he was right. If Sunwoo had been going to classes tomorrow, he might have skipped them for Chanhee’s sake. And he had four classes, not one.

He might need to tell his parents about Chanhee soon, because Sunwoo had a feeling he’d be skipping a lot more classes in the near future. 

“Hey.” Chanhee got his attention with a little tap to his thigh. “Do you know of anywhere I can stay the night? I don’t particularly feel like confronting Kevin-hyung right now.”

Sunwoo perfectly understood. He’d been angry at Hyungseo just as much, if not more than Chanhee had been, and even though he understood Hyungseo’s side of things now, he still didn’t want to talk to the guy for a little while. He’d kind of hurt their friendship a bit, after all.

“I’m sure there are plenty of hotels around,” Sunwoo pointed out. “But if being alone makes you uncomfortable . . .” He suddenly got an idea in his mind. Probably terrible, and he knew if one of his friends found out about it he’d never hear the end of it. But it was still an idea. “You could always come to my dorm? Changmin-hyung  is  gone until tomorrow morning, after all.”

“So we’d be alone.” It was more of a statement than a question.

Sunwoo scratched the back of his head. “Um, yeah? If that makes you uncomfortable, we can always find you a hotel or something.”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Chanhee reassured him. “I just expected you to want some more time to think about what happened today. But if you’re okay with it, so am I.”

“I don’t need more time to think about it,” Sunwoo stated bluntly. “I know what happened, I know your side of the story, and I know why Kevin-hyung did what he did. There’s nothing more to think about. So come stay with me tonight.”

“If you’re sure,” Chanhee submitted.

“I am,” Sunwoo said.

Now they just had to find a way to get to his dorm.

——

“I don’t think we thought this out very well,” Sunwoo blurted out the instant he and Chanhee walked into his dorm room. He’d been so hyper-focused on merely being in Chanhee’s presence that he’d forgotten there were only two single beds in his dorm, one of which was Changmin’s.

And unfortunately, Changmin was very particular about people being on his bed.

“Today hasn’t been a day for thinking well,” Chanhee pointed out with a gentle laugh. He had his left arm looped through Sunwoo’s right - a friendly, warm gesture. “I’m sure we’ll figure something out.”

“Yeah, you sleep on the bed, I’ll sleep on the floor,” Sunwoo said with finality.

He felt Chanhee’s stare turn on him. “Why don’t you just sleep on your roommate’s bed?”

“Changmin’s sheets have been sanctified with holy water from above. His bed is too pure for my filthy corpse.”

Sunwoo was rewarded with Chanhee’s tinkling giggles. “One of those roommates, huh?”

“Wouldn’t you believe it. I’m positive he thinks I’m some sort of demon. Won’t let me come within five feet of his stuff, like I’ll taint it with the souls of the dead if I so much as look at it.”

“Well, what better way for him to protect his stuff?”

Sunwoo slipped his arm out of Chanhee’s so he could trudge over to his bed and perch on the edge. He watched as Chanhee followed suit. 

“You don’t think I’m a demon, do you?” he asked the pink haired boy.

Chanhee whipped his head around until he was gazing deep into Sunwoo’s eyes, one eyebrow mischievously cocked. Their noses were maybe two centimeters apart. “I don’t know, are you?”

Seeing Chanhee this close up, every line and feature of his face prominent in the weak golden glow of the lamplight, Sunwoo’s heart was doing all sorts of tumbling. It was flipping around and thumping in his ears, making his vision flash red with every beat. Sunwoo’s eyes slipped down to Chanhee’s lips.

“Why don’t you tell me?” he growled deeply into the air. He could see Chanhee’s eyelashes flutter from the force of his breath.

It must have been the thick tension between them, or the tone of his voice, or the implied permission Sunwoo had just given that made Chanhee surge forward and crash his lips against Sunwoo’s.

Kissing Chanhee was like everything Sunwoo had imagined, but a thousand times better. There were explosions and fireworks and rockets tearing through Sunwoo’s stomach and filling him with the most pleasant feeling he’d ever experienced in his life. 

His arms instinctively came up to engulf Chanhee in his embrace, one hand resting over that slim back and the other pulling Chanhee closer until their bodies were pressed together. Chanhee had his own hands cupping Sunwoo’s face as the kiss deepened.

It was passionate, heated, emotional. Both of them were desperate from finding love after so long being alone. At the same time, it was also freeing. They’d found each other in a lost and broken world despite their lost and broken pasts.

Sunwoo wasn’t quite sure how it happened, but at some point, he’d swung his legs over Chanhee’s lap to relieve his waist of its painful twisted position. His neck was bending down now and Chanhee’s bending up so they could meet each other’s lips. Chanhee’s hands dropped from Sunwoo’s cheeks to settle over his waist. 

The kiss lasted two minutes, maybe more (with a brief respite for air in between), before Sunwoo’s weight had them both toppling over backwards on the bed.

They probably would have kept going if it weren’t for Chanhee’s head knocking into the wall on their way down.

Sunwoo was up in a flash. “Oh my god, that sounded painful! Are you okay?” He hovered over Chanhee with his hands out in case the older boy needed help.

Fortunately, Chanhee just sat up with a rueful look in Sunwoo’s direction. He’d taken off his beret and was rubbing the back of his head. “Stop freaking out, I’m fine.”

Sunwoo squeaked indignantly. “I was not freaking out!”

“Uh huh, sure.” Chanhee patted the spot beside him, and Sunwoo sat. They opted for holding hands this time around. “What time is your roommate supposed to get here tomorrow morning? Do you know?”

“He told me ten am. So as long as we’re up before then we should be fine. I can text him you’re here if you want, though, so he’s not surprised when he gets here.”

Chanhee shrugged. “Whatever you want. But why don’t you just sleep with me, so you don’t have to hurt your back sleeping on the floor?”

Oh.

Sunwoo gulped.

He had an awfully small bed (hence the reason Chanhee had just smacked his head on the wall), and there wasn’t a lot of room, and he’d never actually slept in the same bed with someone else before. He wasn’t sure how he’d feel sleeping with Chanhee, even if his heart told him he wanted to.

However, the moment Chanhee grabbed his hand and dragged him down onto the bed, the warmth between them and the softness of Chanhee’s body pressed against his made all his worries fly out the window. This was actually rather nice. He’d have no problem sleeping.

“Hold on, give me a second to turn off the lights,” he murmured. He detached himself from Chanhee to stand and move toward the light switch. “You can put your beret on my nightstand.”

He waited for Chanhee to follow his orders and settle back down into the bed before he flicked the lights off. On his way back to his bed, he took a moment to crack open the window and let the chilly night air flow in. He’d heard how sweaty sleeping with another person could get.

Then, setting his alarm for nine fifteen and dropping his phone on his desk, he climbed back under the covers and into Chanhee’s waiting arms. 

It didn’t take long for either of them to fall asleep.

——

Sunwoo was rudely awakened by the sound of the door opening. He could hear voices speaking loudly to each other in the hallway and he wanted to smack whoever was being so loud.

But, the moment the lights flickered on above him and blinded him, he suddenly remembered.

He was in his dorm sleeping on the same bed with Chanhee. He could tell his head was resting on Chanhee’s chest and his arms were semi-wrapped around the older boy’s waist. His nose was poking into Chanhee’s hoodie just above his heart.

Chanhee was moving beneath him, obviously having woken from the loud sounds as well.

“So I told him he’d have to touch the snake first before I’d let him anywhere near the popsicle stand!”

“That’s hilarious, dude. You’re gonna have to tell me everything that happened later.”

“Oh, for sure. Maybe we could do lunch?”

“Sure, sounds good. Meet me at one in the-“

When it hit Sunwoo who the people were that were speaking, he effectively woke up in less than a second. He shot up in bed, eyes wild, heart plunging into his stomach as he laid eyes on Changmin and Youngjae staring wide-eyed at him from the doorway.

It took him another second to realize that Chanhee had sat up as well, and pulled the covers up to his chin in shame. A heavy dusting of pink had washed over his nose and cheeks. 

“Sunwoo-yah?” Youngjae gaped. “What’s going on?”

Oh, he was so royally screwed. 


	7. First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunwoo and Chanhee go on their first date. Dream finally makes an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys, I apologize this update has been a little later than normal, and is also a little shorter than normal. I’ve been super busy recently, with a wedding and new job conditions - I’m one of three tutors at a tutoring center and I’m the only one who is available to meet students in person, so I’m also the only one who gets all the in-person students. I still have some of my online students as well, so I’m going to be a lot busier in the near future. Updates, as such, will be a little slower and shorter. I should be able to get them out every week or so, but don’t expect more than that. Thanks for understanding! Love you guys, and thank you so much for the comments and kudos - you have no idea how much they keep me going!

“I can’t believe they caught us.”

Sunwoo and Chanhee were standing right outside Sangyeon’s café at the moment, and Chanhee was currently ramming his head into the glass window. 

He must have a hard head, if he could survive that after whacking his head on the wall the night before. 

“You say that like we were doing something bad,” Sunwoo said dryly. He lifted a hand and held it up to the window so Chanhee now hit his hand instead of the glass. “We weren’t doing anything wrong.”

“I knoooow,” Chanhee whined. “But now Changmin-ssi and Eric-ssi will tell your friends, and your friends will tell  _ my  _ friends, and my friends will kill me!”

“At least they don’t know we kissed.”

Chanhee whisked his head up so quickly Sunwoo was surprised he didn’t give himself a case of whiplash. “Yah! Can’t you at least indulge in my torment for a moment?”

“Nope.” Sunwoo flashed Chanhee a smile and opened the door to push his friend inside. “Go find us a seat. I’ll order our drinks.”

“Fine.” Chanhee departed from Sunwoo with a single annoyed slap to his upper arm. “Don’t mess it up or I’ll kill you!”

Sunwoo merely stuck his tongue out at Chanhee. Then, he hurried over to the line forming at the registers and waited his turn.

While there, he felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket. After what had happened over the last few days, he couldn’t even begin to think what the text might say. However, when he pulled it out and saw his mother’s name scrawled at the top of the notification, his heart plummeted.

All the text said was,  _ We need to talk.  _

Yeah they did. And Sunwoo knew no matter what he said, it wasn’t going to end well. He really didn’t want to ruin this date with Chanhee, though, so he heaved a sigh and pushed his phone back into his pocket. He’d worry about his parents later.

For now, he wanted to enjoy his time with Chanhee.

“Hi, may I take your order?” 

As it was morning shift, Sunwoo didn’t know any of the workers. He never talked to or interacted with the morning workers whatsoever, except for perhaps a hello or goodbye on Saturdays when he worked afternoons instead of evenings. So it was kind of unusual not to be offered his employee discount right from the start.

“Hey, could you put in the employee discount for me? My name is Kim Sunwoo, I work the night shift,” he said. “You can check the time table in the back room if you need confirmation.”

“No, I know who you are,” the employee smiled. He was cute in that baby-face way, with puffy cheeks and a small forehead and eyes that sparkled with more than just a hint of shy friendliness. “Sangyeon-hyung tells us a lot about the night shift.”

“Yeah, apparently you guys qualify for ‘comedy infringement,’” another employee working the drinks piped up. In a total contrast to the boy at the register, his eyes held a world of mischief. “Whatever that means.” He muttered to himself as an afterthought, “I should have that qualification.”

Sunwoo stared at him for a hard second, just trying to figure him out. He quickly forgot about the barista when he remembered he had a date. “Anyway, um, I’ll get a Java Chip frappe and a cold mocha latte - extra whipped cream.”

“One frappe and one latte coming right up!” the baby barista exclaimed. 

Sunwoo paid for the order and went to stand at the other end of the counter, where he usually worked and handed out drinks. It was kind of odd being the customer this time around. 

As he waited for his order, he decided it would be a good time to uncover the answer to a question that had been nagging at him. Plus, seeing as there were no other customers at the moment, he could hear the answers from all the workers on morning shift.

“So, guys,” he called out, and saw them all pause to look at him, “which one of you ate the cupcakes that were here Tuesday morning?”

The response was instantaneous. Half the workers shared guilty looks with each other, and the other half either stared at the floor or returned to aggressively doing their jobs. None of them seemed to want to directly answer the red-headed boy leaning casually against the counter. 

Sometimes Sunwoo loved how intimidating he could be.

“I’m not gonna bite you, guys,” he chuckled after a moment. One of them, working on his drinks, risked a glance at him. “I’m just curious.”

Finally, after a short interval in which one of the workers disappeared to the back room, the employee who’d glanced at him spoke up. “You must be Kim Sunwoo, the one the cupcakes belonged to, right?”

Sunwoo flashed a smile at him. “Yes, I am.”

The worker carefully slid two drinks over to him and let out a sigh. “Sangyeon-hyung let us have it when he found out we’d eaten the cupcakes. Warned us that next time we should make sure there’s a note or something saying the cupcakes were for us to eat.”

“Yeah, that’d be helpful,” Sunwoo agreed amiably. “So all of you on morning shift ate them?”

“Yeah.” The guy sighed again. “I’m Lee Jeno, a sophomore at Mingsu’s School of Fine Arts.”

“Wait, you go to school there?” Sunwoo interrupted.

Jeno nodded, taken aback. “Yeah, all of us on morning shift do.”

“Whoa! I go there too!” Sunwoo exclaimed. “We should meet up sometime, talk about classes and work and stuff!”

Jeno seemed pleasantly surprised at the news. He finally broke out into a smile. “Sure, if you’re down for it.” He pointed at the cashier who’d taken Sunwoo’s order. “That’s our baby, Park Jisung. He’s a rising freshman, after he finishes his senior year of high school.” Next, he pointed at the other drink taker. “That’s Lee Donghyuck, also a sophomore.”

He then brought Sunwoo’s attention to a slim, blue-haired barista happily flirting away with a customer. “Na Jaemin, sophomore.” He turned back around to face Sunwoo. “The other two in the back room are from China. Zhong Chenle is one of our order takers, and Huang Renjun is our morning shift manager.”

“Huh, interesting.” Sunwoo waved to all the workers who waved back. One of them - Donghyuck, if he remembered correctly - shot him a finger heart. “Well, I’ll talk to you again sometime,” he said to Jeno. “Thanks for the chat! And I’m glad you guys enjoyed the cupcakes.” He winked at them, pointed at Chanhee, murmured, “He made them,” then grabbed his drinks and went to join Chanhee by the window. 

“What was that all about?” the pink haired boy asked him. He accepted his mocha latte from Sunwoo with a gentle thanks. “They looked terrified for half a second there.”

“Oh, it was nothing.” Sunwoo dropped into his seat and took a sip of his Java Chip frappe. As usual, it tasted amazing. “I was confronting them about eating my cupcakes.”

Chanhee stared at Sunwoo with a look of utter consternation. “Sunwoo-yah! Really? That’s so rude!”

Sunwoo merely shrugged in indifference. He reached for a napkin and used it to swipe at the whipped cream spilling out the top of his lid. “What, I just wanted to know who they were. All six of them go to my university, except the cashier who’ll be a freshman there starting next year. We’re gonna get together and talk sometime.”

Chanhee stared at him for a moment longer before shaking his head and diving into his latte again. “I can’t believe you.”

“You usually can’t,” Sunwoo grinned cheekily.

Chanhee kicked at his shin under the table. “Stop making fun of me,” he whined.

“You should know by now that teasing is required if you date me,” Sunwoo laughed.

“Yeah, but do you really have to tease me  all  the time?” Chanhee asked.

Sunwoo took another sip of his frappe. “First of all, I don’t. And second, just remember who walked in here and started teasing me first.”

Defeated, Chanhee thumped back against his chair with arms crossed and lips pursed. He was staring at his frappe as if it had framed him for murder, but then he met Sunwoo’s gaze across the table, and both of them broke out in soft laughter.

No, neither of them minded the teasing one bit; it was rather fun, actually, and made them feel more at home with each other. Sunwoo couldn’t be happier than where he was now, in the presence of Chanhee.

He was so lucky.

“Okay, but back to this morning,” Chanhee said when they’d finished laughing, “I thought you said your roommate was getting back at ten am?”

“That’s what he told me,” Sunwoo said, “but apparently they changed it to seven am and Changmin-hyung forgot to tell me.”

“Convenient for us.” Chanhee rolled his eyes toward the heavens. “But I gotta say, he and Eric were way more chill about it than I thought.”

“For real. They’re my best friends and they still surprise me sometimes,” Sunwoo agreed.

“What did Eric say when he walked in? ‘It’s about time Sunwoo got a love life! I was beginning to think I’d have to marry him myself!’”

“And then Changmin said, ‘Hallelujah, I don’t have to be responsible for you anymore, Sunwoo!’”

“As long as we don’t kiss in front of them like they asked, I guess we have their permission to sleep together,” Chanhee snickered. He removed the lid from his half-empty latte and stuck a spoon inside to scoop up the extra whipped cream. “What do you want to do after this?”

Sunwoo had already thought about that. He eyed the silver cross earring still dangling from Chanhee’s ear. “I thought we could go shopping for a couple hours, then have dinner and watch a movie. You know, typical date.”

Chanhee flashed him a smile. “Sounds good. Let’s go as soon as we finish our drinks.”

“Sure.” Sunwoo watched as Chanhee stuffed the mountain of whipped cream in his mouth. It was funny, really, how much Chanhee adored whipped cream, and Sunwoo knew it was cheap and easy to use. He could keep Chanhee content with it, no problem. “Give me one second, I’m going to go make lunch plans with the baristas since I don’t know when I’ll see them again.”

“Okay!” Chanhee said agreeably. “Hurry back!”

“You know it.” 

Sunwoo approached the counter where Jeno was wiping down a little mess he’d made. Productive worker, Sunwoo noted with interest. Generally that meant he would have good character, so Sunwoo was even more excited to get to know him now.

“Hey, Jeno-ssi,” he called.

The boy looked at him expectantly. “Yes?”

“When’s a good day for you and your friends to have lunch?” he asked.

Jeno paused in his work to straighten up and study his friends. Sunwoo saw his eyes flicker over each one of them as he thought about their different schedules and lunch breaks. “You’ll have to double-check with them, but I think Friday would be best for us. I’m free from ten to eleven, and from noon until two. Generally we already eat together on Fridays but sometimes our plans change. You can ask them now if you want, since we don’t have any customers at the moment.”

“I’ll do that.” Sunwoo smiled at him softly, then moved down the counter to the registers so he could talk to the two cashiers. “It’s Jisung-ssi, right?”

The baby-faced barista nodded shyly at him. 

Sunwoo saw the other cashier peeking out at him from behind Jisung. He hadn’t met this one yet. “Hi, are you Chenle-ssi or Renjun-ssi?”

“Zhong Chenle,” the other barista greeted. Sunwoo bowed formally to him, and Chenle did the same. “Jeno-hyung told me we go to the same university, right? The same school that Mark-hyung goes to?”

“Yes, he said we all do, except Jisung-ssi here since he’s still in high school,” Sunwoo explained. “I also work here too. But I don’t think I know Mark.”

“He’s my boyfriend,” Donghyuck shouted as he bustled by with a pail of fresh water in his hands. Sunwoo could see a couple of towels floating around inside the bucket. “He doesn’t work here, but he is a junior at our school. Would you mind if joined us for lunch Friday? He could use some more help with his Korean.”

Ah, Jeno must have told Donghyuck about the plans for Friday already. It sounded like they both could come, and it also sounded like Sunwoo might have found a new English-speaking friend for Youngjae, Hyungseo, and Joonyoung.

“The more the merrier,” he grinned. “Where is Mark from? The US? Canada?”

“Canada,” Donghyuck said. “He’s been here for a few years but he’s a bit thick-headed so he still needs help with his Korean sometimes.”

“Well, I think I might have just the people to help him,” Sunwoo promised. “Three of my closest friends are native English speakers. Jacob-hyung and Kevin-hyung are both from Canada, and Eric’s family lives in the US. Oh, and hey, Jacob-hyung works the night shift here with me if you ever want to get to know him.”

“I might do that, thanks!” Donghyuck set the bucket down under the counter and held his hand out for a high five. Sunwoo gave him one. “Oh, and both Renjun-hyung and Jaemin-ah should be able to make it. We haven’t asked them yet but they always eat with us on Fridays. I’ll drag their sloppy butts down to the cafeteria if they say no.”

Sunwoo chuckled at that. The dynamic between the baristas here, particularly between Donghyuck and the others, reminded him a lot of the dynamic between him and his own coworkers on the night shift. He doubted they’d have much trouble fitting in.

“One more thing, Sunwoo-ssi,” Chenle broke in. His eyes were gentle but determined. “If you don’t support gays, forget about the lunch entirely. We won’t have anything to do with you, nor will we ever want to.”

Well, they certainly had loyalty to each other and to their beliefs, that was for sure. Sunwoo had absolutely nothing against that.

“Well, you’re in luck,” he said, and pointed his finger at Chanhee who was watching them with a friendly smile, “because I’m on a date with him.”

Chenle followed his finger, noticed Chanhee, and nodded in satisfaction. “Guess you can’t get gayer than that,” he laughed. “Also, just so you know, Jisung-ah and I are dating, and Jeno-hyung, Jaemin-hyung, and Renjun-ge are actually in a polyamorous relationship.”

That surprised Sunwoo. He’d heard about polyamorous relationships before, where there were more than two people dating each other, but he’d actually never met someone like that before. Nor did he know if he’d ever want to be in a relationship with more than one person at a time. It seemed too difficult in every aspect - finding a time to get together, showing affection equally, agreeing on something to do.

But hey, if it worked for the boys and they were happy with each other, then he was happy for them. 

“That’s cool,” he commented. He noticed Jeno and the blue-haired boy - Jaemin - smiling at him; they must have heard the conversation. “You’ll have to tell me tomorrow what it’s like,” he directed to Jaemin. 

“Of course!” the barista exclaimed in heavily accented English. Sunwoo almost laughed at how funny his voice was. He didn’t because that would be rude, but something about Jaemin, something silly and light-hearted in his dark eyes, told Sunwoo Jaemin probably wouldn’t have minded if he had laughed.

“Jaemin-hyung’s always trying to show off his English skills,” Chenle muttered, rolling his eyes. “Little does he know, Renjun-ge and I are way better at it than he is.”

“And Markeu-hyung!” Donghyuck yelled. “He’s Canadian, remember!”

“WHAT?” Jaemin screeched in English again. “WOW. So rude.”

“See?” Chenle said pointedly, and reluctantly ran off to distract Jaemin from ruining his image further. Sunwoo watched as the Chinese tackled his friend and dragged him to the back, both of them giggling the whole time. 

They were certainly an interesting group of people, and they seemed to be as close of friends as Sunwoo was with his barista family. It warmed him to see that deep bond between brothers and lovers running through the veins of these boys as well. It was one of the nicest things to see in a world full of evil.

“Well, I don’t want to keep my date waiting, so I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Sunwoo said. “Let’s meet at one o’clock in the lobby of the school cafeteria. Sound good?”

He asked no one but everyone in particular since he didn’t know who would speak for them, although Jeno seemed to be doing a good job. Thus, he wasn’t surprised when Jeno ambled back over to him.

“That should work for us,” he announced. “And if it doesn’t,” he added, placing a blank receipt in Sunwoo’s hands, “I’ll let you know. Just text me from this number before lunch tomorrow and I’ll be sure to tell you if we’re still good to go.”

“Awesome, sounds great! Thank you!”

Sunwoo bade the boys a final farewell, laughing when Donghyuck and Jaemin fought over who spoke better English, and returned to the table where Chanhee sat.

The older boy had finished his latte.

“They seem nice,” Chanhee said once they’d thrown their cups away and exited the café. “If you like them, will I be able to meet them sometime?”

“I don’t see why not,” Sunwoo replied. “If they start hanging out with me they’ll have to meet you one way or another.”

“Oh, so you’re planning on hanging out with me more in the future then?” Chanhee asked. He winked at Sunwoo to show he was just joking and already knew the answer. “What are you gonna do, show me off to them?”

“I’d show you off to everyone if you let me,” Sunwoo mumbled shyly. He turned his face away as he spoke, cheeks burning red in embarrassment at the fact that he, Kim Sunwoo, had just flirted of his own free will. 

With his face turned away, he couldn’t see Chanhee’s reaction to his words. However, he did feel a hand slip into his and give it a gentle squeeze.

“You can show me off all you want as long as you let me do the same with you,” he heard Chanhee whisper back. Sunwoo’s heart fluttered at the words. “Which means we should go shopping and get each other something to wear.”

Sunwoo chanced a look at Chanhee, only to see the pink-haired boy already staring at him lovingly. He felt something in his chest jump in delight at the look. “You mean I find an outfit for you, and you find an outfit for me?” he clarified.

“Exactly. And we have to wear it for the rest of the date,” Chanhee declared. 

Well, he certainly had ideas. Sunwoo was a little worried about how Chanhee’s style would fit on him since he didn’t think he could pull it off. But he supposed that was half the reason they were going to do it.

“Okay,” he agreed after a minute. “I think that’ll be interesting.”

“Interesting and fun,” Chanhee corrected. “I know this great place we can go to. It’s a couple blocks away.” He was swinging their hands between them, eyes scanning over the different stores and restaurants and businesses they passed. Maybe getting ideas for later.

He looked happy. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to take your car?” Sunwoo asked skeptically. Chanhee had driven to the store they’d talked at last night, and driven from there to Sunwoo’s dorm room, then to the café this morning. It just seemed much more convenient to take the car than to walk so far. “Won’t your feet get tired?”

Chanhee brushed his worries off. “No, I don’t think so. I like walking and enjoying the atmosphere of the city. It also gives us more time to talk. But we can go back and get my car if that’s more comfortable for you.”

“No, no, this is fine,” he reassured Chanhee. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay with it.”

He felt Chanhee’s gaze on him again. “Sure you did,” the pink haired boy said lightly. He gave Sunwoo’s hand another squeeze. “Come on, Sun, let’s hurry and go shopping!”

They raced each other the rest of the way to the store, and Sunwoo lost, which he thought was totally unfair since he didn’t even know which store Chanhee had been wanting to go to. He said as much, and complained that the race had been rigged from the start. Chanhee just laughed at him and pushed him inside the store.

“I’ll choose your outfit first,” Chanhee decided. He was clearly excited, practically shivering in anticipation of buying Sunwoo an outfit. Already, even before Sunwoo had agreed, he was twirling around racks of clothes and running his hands over the materials. 

Over the course of the next hour, Sunwoo came to understand just how much fashion meant to Chanhee. The pink-haired boy chose so many different outfits and continuously threw them over Sunwoo’s arms for him to try on. Sunwoo had to go to the fitting room three times just because he was carrying so many clothes his arms were hurting.

While Chanhee searched, Sunwoo studied him with a quiet intensity. He honestly loved the way Chanhee’s eyes lit up the whole time, and the way he rambled on and on about why this particular piece of cloth would look good on Sunwoo. Sunwoo wasn’t even listening half the time; he was content with watching Chanhee in his element, smiling and laughing and talking to the point Sunwoo couldn’t get a word in edgewise. It was truly breathtaking, beautiful, seeing Chanhee talk about something he was so passionate about.

Sunwoo finally understood why people always said one of the most beautiful things in the world was seeing someone passionate about something they liked. Chanhee had never seemed more beautiful to Sunwoo than in this moment.

“Okay, I think I’ve finally got an outfit for you.” After an hour and a half of shopping and Chanhee holding clothes up to Sunwoo’s shoulders and waist, he’d finally found an outfit he thought might work. “Go try these on.”

He threw a plain black t-shirt, a black leather jacket, black leather boots, and black pants with silver pocket zippers into his arms. Simple in color, but stylish. Sunwoo had a feeling it would suit him well. 

“You gave me all black,” he pointed out.

Chanhee replied with, “Yeah, I’ve noticed you wear black a lot. Not sure why, but I’m sure it has something to do with your black soul.”

“Yah,” Sunwoo complained softly. He nudged Chanhee until the older boy lost his balance and stumbled into a clothes rack. “I just think it looks good on me.”

“It does,” Chanhee smiled at him. “But you should think about trying some other colors sometime. I think red and white would look good on you as well.”

Huh. Maybe he should try wearing something other than boring old black for once. But even if he did keep wearing black, maybe he could wear this outfit Chanhee had chosen for him. If it fit.

“Dude, go try them on,” Chanhee pressed. He gave Sunwoo a gentle push in the direction of the fitting rooms. “And let me see how they look.”

“Fine, fine. I’m going. Also, I know what I want you to wear. I just haven’t taken the clothes off their rack yet.”

Leaving Chanhee with an eager, anticipatory look on his face, Sunwoo jogged into the fitting rooms and set to work. It didn’t take him long to try everything on, and to his surprise, it all fit his figure very well. Sunwoo thought he looked really good, and that was saying a lot since he wasn’t one to think about his looks much.

He stared at himself in the mirror in the changing room for a while, admiring the outfit and the way the lights reflected off the silver zippers just right. He only stopped because Chanhee knocked and asked what was taking so long.

Once he stepped outside, he twirled around to show Chanhee his new look. He was absolutely stoked to see a stunned, happy expression fall over Chanhee’s face.

For once in his life, he felt like he truly looked nice. And for once in his life, he actually cared that he did. Because if Chanhee kept smiling at him like that, he’d definitely learn to enjoy dressing more fashionably. 

“That’s definitely the outfit for you,” Chanhee breathed out. He reached out and brushed a hand over Sunwoo’s shoulder, admiring him. “I’ll buy it.”

Sunwoo smiled softly at him. “First you need to try on the outfit I chose.”

“Then let’s go get it so I can try it on!” Chanhee said eagerly. He bounced on the balls of his feet, clearly excited to have someone else choose an outfit for him for once. Sunwoo hoped he liked the outfit he’d picked for him.

“Come on,” Sunwoo urged, and led Chanhee toward the back of the store where he knew the shirt for the older boy was.

Another ten minutes later, Chanhee stepped out of the fitting room wearing a pair of denim shorts, a tan-and-black striped button-up with a white t-shirt, and a leopard-print cap. An unusual mix, but it fit him somehow, and Sunwoo felt proud for choosing clothes that looked so good on Chanhee. 

Yes, he would gladly show Chanhee off to everyone he met.

“Shall we go buy them now?” Sunwoo asked after they’d changed back into their old clothes, smiling. His cheeks were starting to hurt from the constant grinning - he hadn’t smiled this much in ages.

“Hold on, there’s one more thing I want to get,” Chanhee told him. The pink haired boy grabbed Sunwoo’s hand and quickly dragged him over to the section of the store selling jewelry. Sunwoo was confused at first, but when Chanhee told him, “I noticed your ears are pierced but you never wear earrings,” he understood.

“I prefer not to,” he explained. “They’re not allowed at work, and the dangling ones get stuck in my clothes.”

“Then we’ll just have to find something short enough that it doesn’t catch in your shirt,” Chanhee mused. He leaned over the display case, scanning the many options for any good ones. He paused at a couple of the smaller earrings. “Do you normally wear one or two earrings?”

“One,” Sunwoo replied. “People always say I look better that way.”

“You shouldn’t let other people judge you for anything,” Chanhee chastened him gently. “But since that’s what you’re used to, we’ll get a single earring.” He froze as he hovered over a particular earring. Sunwoo leaned closer to get a better look, and he felt his heart stop when he saw it was a silver cross earring almost identical to Chanhee’s. He knew why Chanhee was hesitating.

He didn’t know if Sunwoo was ready for a couple item yet.

“That’s the one,” Sunwoo murmured, pointing at it. Chanhee’s eyes melted as their gazes met. “I won’t take anything else.”

Sunwoo felt Chanhee’s fingers brush against his hand as thanks, then the pink-haired boy was grabbing the attention of the employee and asking to buy the earring.

In another moment, Chanhee had hold of the earring and was unclipping it from the case, holding it up to Sunwoo’s left ear and checking the length to make sure it didn’t snag on his shirt. Once he was sure it wouldn’t catch, he carefully inserted the cross into Sunwoo’s ear.

It was a little odd since Sunwoo hadn’t worn anything other than studs for over a year now, and the weight dragged at his earlobe a bit. But looking at Chanhee and seeing his smile, as well as that matching cross earring, Sunwoo knew he could easily get used to it.

“I guess we should go buy our new clothes,” Sunwoo said after they’d finished admiring each other. Chanhee agreed, and they quickly paid for their respective outfits, found a public restroom, and changed out of their old outfits into their new ones. 

When they both emerged, refreshed and happy, they linked hands again and headed back out into the foot traffic of the city. 

As it was around noon, their next step was to find a nice restaurant to eat at together. Then they’d watch a movie, grab ice cream, and head back to Chanhee’s apartment. 

They were discussing what restaurant to eat at - Chanhee pointing out various options as they walked by them - when Sunwoo felt his phone vibrating.

“Hang on,” he interrupted Chanhee softly. He separated their hands so he could access his phone from his back pocket.

When he saw who it was, he sighed and clicked his phone off. His parents would need to understand one way or another that he wasn’t going to call them until he was ready. And he wouldn’t be ready until his date with Chanhee was over.

However, Chanhee caught wind of something wrong. “Who was that?” he asked.

“My mom,” Sunwoo admitted. “She wants to talk about the text I sent her two nights ago.”

“About missing school?”

“Yeah.”

Chanhee’s arm pulled Sunwoo in close to the older boy’s chest. “You should call her,” Chanhee murmured. “Just get it done with instead of prolonging your anxiety.”

“I wanted to wait until our date was over, though.” Sunwoo couldn’t bring himself to look in Chanhee’s eyes.

Chanhee stopped walking to stand in front of Sunwoo and hold him by the shoulders. “I would rather you do it now while I’m here to comfort you than later when you’ll be alone with your thoughts.”

What had Sunwoo done to deserve such an amazing friend? Seriously, he’d never been the nicest person, or the coolest, or even the most understanding. And yet, Chanhee was here refusing to let him be alone where his thoughts could haunt him.

Or maybe, Sunwoo mused, Chanhee knew from his past experience with Yoonseok how dangerous it could be to listen to negative thoughts. That was ultimately where one’s protection of themselves began to slip. 

“Besides,” Chanhee added when Sunwoo made no reaction, “your parents will never show you respect until you respect them first. It doesn’t matter if they deserve it, or if you want to give it to them. You have to be respectful and understanding of their position before they’ll listen to yours.”

Unfortunately, he was one hundred percent correct. And that was why talking to his parents was so hard. Sunwoo felt like they never understood what he wanted to do.

Perhaps he could fix that. Right now.

“Okay,” he said shakily, stepping back from Chanhee. He grabbed his phone again. “I’ll call her. Give me a couple minutes.”

Chanhee nodded and took a few steps down the sidewalk - close enough that he could intervene if need be, but far enough away that he couldn’t hear the conversation. He gave Sunwoo an encouraging smile.

And Sunwoo, nervous beyond belief, sucked in a deep breath of air and pressed his mother’s name in his contact list.

She picked up on the second ring, which didn’t surprise him. But his heart still began racing faster than the cheetah itself, and his breathing picked up as he said, “Hello?”

He was ready for almost anything - a scolding, a chastening, shouting, screaming, fighting, fury. 

What he was not ready for was the frantic, “Sunwoo, baby, are you okay?” that came from the receiver.

Sunwoo actually pulled his phone back to make sure he’d called the right person. Yes, it was his mother. But she didn’t sound angry.

He could only manage a dumb-founded “What?” in response.

“Sun, you left me a message Tuesday night saying that you fainted at work and were skipping two days of school! I tried calling you multiples times yesterday and today but you never picked up or read any of my text messages! Do you know how worried I was? How worried your father was? We thought something horrible had happened to you, like you were in the hospital in a coma or something!”

She was speaking so quickly it was hard to keep up, but Sunwoo got the gist of it from the tone of relief she spoke in. He was more than a little shocked and surprised that she was finally seeming to understand how much he was struggling.

“Mom, Mom, it’s okay, I’m fine,” he reassured her. “I’ve had a rough couple of days, but everything is better now and I’m actually really happy with where I’m at. I’m on a date with this guy I really like. He’s super sweet and caring and I think you’d like him.”

There was a brief lull on the other end of the line as Sunwoo’s mom digested the information and calmed down. Her son was fine, he was on a date, and he was happy. Things must have gotten better in the two days since he’d texted. 

“So you and Giwook-ah are officially done then,” she murmured, and sighed. Sunwoo knew she’d highly approved of Cya. “How did you meet this new guy? What’s his name? Tell me all about him!”

Since when had she become so interested in his life outside of school? Maybe Sunwoo’s fainting spell had made her see the light - shown her that she was making her son do too much and he needed a break.

“His name is Choi Chanhee,” he said, smiling over at the boy in question as he spoke, to let him know everything was okay. Chanhee gave him a thumbs-up and a gigantic smile. “I met him at work. He knows my boss and decided to come in and get coffee one day, and we struck up a conversation. Conversation led to meeting up outside of my job, and today is my first official date with him.”

“Who asked who out?” his mom asked. Sunwoo almost laughed at how eager she sounded. Okay, so maybe he’d been wrong about how interested she was about his love life. Maybe she just hadn’t asked him about it because she knew how much Giwook had hurt him. No use bringing up bad memories. Now that he had someone new, though, she felt safe enough taking about his love life again.

“I asked him out,” Sunwoo laughed. “Do you want to say hi to him? He’s right here with me.”

“Oh, sure, yeah! Let me meet him!”

Chuckling, Sunwoo motioned for Chanhee to join him. He put the phone on speaker. “Here he is, Mom. Say hello to Chanhee-hyung.”

“Hello, Chanhee-ssi!” his mom greeted. “I heard you’re on a date with my son!”

“Hi, Mrs. Kim,” Chanhee replied. “Yes, I am. I’ve enjoyed it very much so far.”

“I’m glad! I have to ask, though, since I’m his mother: what do you like about my baby Seonoo?”

Of course she’d ask that. And of course she’d use those horrible nicknames right in front of Chanhee. Sunwoo couldn’t help but smack his forehead into his palm. He heard Chanhee laugh from beside him.

“It’s hard to say, Mrs. Kim, because I like just about every part of him equally.” Sunwoo felt heat rising from his neck to his cheeks, both from embarrassment and from shyness at the compliment. “He makes me happier than anyone ever has before. He’s silly and savage and sweet all at the same time. But he has this secret soft spot for his friends that he doesn’t like people to know about. He’s a beautiful puzzle that I’m trying to put together, one that I want to keep solving for the rest of my life.”

It was a bold statement, that, with Chanhee basically telling Sunwoo he wanted to be friends forever - or maybe more, if their dates continued to go well. It made Sunwoo feel all tingly and squeamish inside, in the best way possible. 

He’d found someone he wanted to love forever, and now he knew that someone wanted to love him back. They’d even told his mom, which meant they were dead serious about it, too.

Sunwoo was the luckiest man alive. He had Chanhee all to himself. 

“That was beautiful,” Sunwoo’s mother gasped. Sunwoo could picture her wiping away a tear and running to tell her husband their precious son had found ‘the one.’ “You sound like a good guy, Chanhee-ssi, so I hope you take care of my Sunwoo well. Let me know if you have any questions or if you want any baby stories about him! I’ve got all the dirt!”

“MOM!” Sunwoo screeched, and quickly took her off speaker phone. He was appalled that she’d even suggest such a thing to anyone, much less to Chanhee. He’d have to make sure Chanhee never got his mother’s phone number. “Seriously? On my first date with him?”

“Honey, if he wants your embarrassing baby stories this early on, he’s a keeper,” his mom stated in her “I know everything” voice. “You should ask him out on another date.”

“I was planning to,” he muttered. He’d walked away from Chanhee again, so thankfully the other boy didn’t hear. He didn’t want his mom to embarrass him further. “But I do need to get going. We’re trying to find a restaurant to eat at.”

“Ooh, sounds fancy,” his mom commented. Sunwoo could practically see her winking at him. “One more thing before I hang up, baby. I know your father and I have been very strict about your grades and your studies so far. But just remember that you’ll always be our son, and you come before anything else. If you need to take a break, then all you have to do is explain the situation to us and we’ll try to work with you. Don’t wait until you faint next time to make us see sense, okay? You had us so worried.”

Now Sunwoo felt bad for even believing that they’d care more about his grades than his health. He couldn’t remember when he’d starting believing that, either. Maybe that one year he failed a class because he spent so much time with Giwook? Maybe when he’d made a toxic friend and they’d turned him into a bad person?

Or maybe, just maybe, it was when Cya had broken up with him and he’d started to see only the negative in people.

He’d told himself that if Cya was capable of breaking his heart and lying to him, everybody was. He’d believed that, deep down, everybody was evil at heart. Yes, even some of his friends from work - Younghoon, Juyeon, Sangyeon, and, sadly, even Joonyoung. Through Cya, he’d learned that the nicest people could leave the deepest scars when they left.

He never let himself get horribly attached to anyone after that as a result, hence the reason most of his friends questioned his loyalty to them. It was also why he was so savage and closed off to the people around him. If he was mean, he couldn’t be hurt again. 

So why, then, had he only seen the best in Chanhee?

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he murmured remorsefully. “Cya-hyung leaving me kind of messed up the way I saw people. I let all my emotions transfer over into the way I thought of you and Dad as well. Please forgive me.”

Sunwoo thought he might have heard a quiet sniffle. He had a sneaking suspicion his mom knew exactly what had been happening to him, and that’s why she’d been so hard on him. It was the only way she saw how to snap him out of his bad thoughts.

“There’s no need for an apology, Sun,” she replied. “I understand, I really do. I’ve been dumped my fair share of times in the past. But let me tell you, when you meet the right one, everything seems so much better and brighter, and you feel like nothing can ever stop you. That’s how your father makes me feel. So if Chanhee makes you feel the same and is able to make you forget about Giwook, then he’s probably the right one for you.”

Well, Sunwoo hadn’t known she’d been dumped in the past. It made him feel better, knowing she had wisdom and experience, and most importantly, an understanding of how he’d been feeling for the past year. Sunwoo truly didn’t deserve her.

“And I apologize if I ever made you feel like your studies were more important than your health or my love for you,” his mom continued. “That was never my intention. So please, if you ever need to talk, or take a break, or accept advice from me, I’m only a call away.”

Sunwoo felt like he could cry again, but after already crying twice in a week, he didn’t have the heart to. Instead, he let his whole body fill with warmth and happiness, and a freedom he hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

Acknowledging his mistakes, realizing Cya wasn’t everybody, learning to love and trust people again . . . it made him feel so much better than always seeing the worst in his friends. 

He would appreciate his friends so much more after this. He finally felt like he could trust them with his deepest fears and his shattered but slowly-healing heart. They weren’t anything like Giwook, and they never would be. They loved him for who he was, even with his flaws and mistakes. 

If they were showing him their love and affection all this time, then it was only right that they receive his in return. He’d been holding back from them for so long.

No more.

“Hey, Mom?” he asked softly after a brief silence.

He heard his sister’s voice in the background. “Yes, honey?”

“Would you be mad if I told you I was thinking about dropping out of school?”

There.

The bomb had been dropped, and there was no going back.

He hadn’t told anyone about this, not even Changmin or Youngjae, because it had been such a weight on his heart. He hadn’t even considered it until recently, but he knew it was definitely becoming clearer and clearer that school wasn’t for him, even with his good grades.

His mom hummed for a moment. “That depends. Are you leaving for your health or some similar reason, or are you planning on spending all your money on becoming a male prostitute?”

Sunwoo nearly choked. “Mom, what the heck? I would never do something like that!”

“Good. Cause if you did, you’d be in serious trouble and I’d be more mad than you’ve ever seen me before.”

She had a sense of morality, that was for sure. She also had this knack of making him never want to do something immoral.

“Good to know,” he responded, grinning. “I was thinking of dropping out for a couple of reasons. School doesn’t interest me, for one, even though I’m doing really well. There’s also the fact that I’m overextending myself too much trying to work and pay for my tuition while getting a 4.0. And finally, because I already have all the knowledge I need to become a rapper. I’ve taken all the classes required, and I know how to get my name out in the rapping community. The only thing I need is a computer and a piano where I can write and produce music, and my current job will have me paying that off in just a couple months if I drop out.”

“Well, as long as you’re doing what you think is right for you, I’m not one to complain,” Mrs. Kim said. “And ultimately, Sun, you’re twenty-two and capable of making your own decisions. Whether your father and I approve doesn’t matter.”

“It does to me. So will you tell me if you’re okay with it?”

“Personally, I’d be a little disappointed. But I’d also be happy knowing you’re happy and doing what you love. I’ll support you whatever you decide to do. And I know your father will too.”

“Will you tell him about this?” Sunwoo asked. “About my wanting to drop out? I want to get some of his thoughts too.”

“Of course,” Mrs. Kim promised. “I’ll have him call you sometime in the next week if possible. If he’s fine with it, I’ll text you letting you know.”

“Okay. Thanks, Mom.” Sunwoo glanced back over his shoulder to see Chanhee staring up at a restaurant sign. “I need to go now, I don’t want to keep Chanhee-hyung waiting.”

“Absolutely!” Suddenly, his mom was back to her spritely self. “I’m so happy things seem to be getting better for you. Cherish this Chanhee, make him feel like he’s the most important person in the world, and things will work out between you. Don’t lose him if you know in your heart he’s the right one for you. And be sure to let me know when you decide whether or not you’re going to stay in school.”

“I will,” he promised. “And thank you, for understanding. I love you, Mom.”

“I love you too, baby. Bye-bye now.”

“Bye.”

Sunwoo pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at the screen for a full ten seconds after his mother hung up. He couldn’t believe how well the whole conversation had gone, and that he had her approval to drop out of school if he decided to.

He hadn’t been expecting that at all.

He felt so light and happy and warm inside, like he could burst from the amount of emotions swimming around in his chest and head right now, or at least that he could scream in laughter. Another piece of his shattered heart picked itself off the floor and floated to its beating core, reattaching and melding back into place. 

At this rate, Sunwoo would be whole again in no time at all.

“I trust everything went well?” 

Chanhee’s voice sounded from beside him, and Sunwoo glanced back to see him hovering nearby. Chanhee must have seen that his call had ended.

Sunwoo flashed the brightest smile at his date he could muster. He hoped he could make Chanhee see how absolutely happy he was right now.

“It was amazing,” he said. “She was super understanding and even told me to take a break.”

Chanhee returned his smile. “See, it wasn’t all that bad, was it?”

Sunwoo ignored his statement in favor of suddenly grasping Chanhee and wrenching him into his arms. He let himself melt into the feeling of that dainty waist in his arms, the smell of lavender and oak wood around him, the head of pink hair pushed into his cheek and mouth.

He felt a rush of overwhelming love take hold of him.

“She also said not to lose you,” he murmured in Chanhee’s ear. “And I don’t intend to.” 


	8. SNEAK PEEK AT UPCOMING CHAPTER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! Since I haven't been able to update in a while (the test for my joints came back negative, so now my doctor is thinking it's some type of rare arthritis), I thought I'd temporarily satisfy your longing with a sneak peek at a future chapter. Note that this excerpt from that chapter has a ton of spoilers, so if you don't want the story spoiled for you, DON'T READ IT, OKAY? >:( :D 
> 
> !!!Trigger Warning!!!
> 
> Mentions of Suicide and a Suicide Attempt are in this excerpt.

PLEASE NOTE THIS IS A SNEAK PEEK OF AN UPCOMING CHAPTER. THERE ARE SPOILERS, SO IF YOU DON'T WANT THE STORY SPOILED, DO NOT READ THIS!!

!!!Major Trigger Warning!!! Mentions of Suicide and a Suicide Attempt are in this chapter! Please use discretion and don't read if this will trigger you! Stay safe! <3

“Pick up, pick up, pick up,” Sunwoo growled into the phone.

His heart was racing like he’d never felt it race before, to the point it felt like it would explode. With the perilous fear gripping him, he wouldn’t be surprised if that actually happened. He felt dizzy and sick and lightheaded from the utter dread numbing his body. He couldn’t feel anything except the burning of his lungs as he breathed.

But he couldn’t focus on his own fear. He needed to focus on Chanhee, who was probably in his bathroom, alone, crying, ready to die. How could Sunwoo have been so stupid to not tell Chanhee about Cya coming? How could he have forgotten to tell Chanhee that he didn’t love Cya like that anymore - that he never would? How could he have messed up this badly?

Now it might cost him his boyfriend’s life.

“Hello? Sunwoo-yah?”

“Hyunjoon!” Sunwoo practically screamed into the phone. Some of the fear ebbed from his body. “Hyunjoon, where are you?”

Thank the heavens for Hyunjoon’s existence. He must have heard the panic in Sunwoo’s voice, as he didn’t question the lack of honorifics and instead spoke to Sunwoo in the calmest voice possible.

“I’m at my apartment. Is everything okay?”

“Can you check on Chanhee? Please?” Sunwoo gasped. He was breathless, sweating, shaking from the pure terror seizing his limbs. He nearly dropped his phone. “I need you to make sure he’s okay.”

“Of course,” Hyunjoon murmured softly. His voice was grounding Sunwoo in reality, helping him calm down and focus on the important. “I’m going right now.”

“Stay on the line,” Sunwoo ordered. “Tell me if he answers.”

“I’ll do that.”

The next few moments were a tense silence. Cya flew down the streets with no regard to the speed limits or the signs. They didn’t matter when Chanhee’s life was at stake. Sunwoo just wished he could go even faster. They were still three minutes away.

In the background of the connection, Sunwoo could hear Hyunjoon knocking loudly on a door. There was a beat of quiet, then Hyunjoon shouted, “Chanhee-hyung! I need to ask you something! Can you come here for a second?”

Keeping his tone level, neutral, so Chanhee wouldn’t suspect anything. Sunwoo could’ve hugged Hyunjoon for thinking so quickly on his feet, for answering, for listening, for just being there.

But he’d have to do that later. Because Chanhee wasn’t answering.

“Chanhee-hyung! Chanhee-hyung!! Open the door please!”

Hyunjoon’s shouts we’re becoming louder and more panicked with every second that passed. With them, Sunwoo’s heart began to shut down. If Hyunjoon was panicking, then something was wrong. He must be able to hear something that Sunwoo couldn’t. Something that meant Sunwoo’s fears were confirmed.

Chanhee was trying to kill himself.

“Sunwoo, he’s not answering.” Hyunjoon suddenly spoke into the phone, and this time he didn’t try to hide the alarm. Panic was dripping from his voice across the line. Sunwoo felt his heart convulse.

The red-head held a hand to his chest, feeling all the pieces of his heart that had been welded back together shatter again. Shards of it pierced into his soul, shook his mind, gripped his body. He wanted to throw up, or cry, or pass out. Oceans were swimming across his vision.

But he couldn’t give up yet. Not yet. There was still a chance.

“Stay there,” he ordered Hyunjoon. “Don’t stop calling for him. He needs to know you’re not going to leave him.”

_Like Yoonseok did. Like his parents did. Like I did._

Sunwoo choked back a sob.

The sounds of Hyunjoon’s voice calling for Chanhee faded into the background. The car’s engine, the horns, the police sirens disappeared. The only thing Sunwoo could hear was the ringing in his ears. The only thing he could feel was Chanhee’s soft hand in his. The only thing he could see was the look of betrayal on Chanhee’s face.

Betrayal that Sunwoo had caused.

This was all his fault. Chanhee wanted to kill himself because of Sunwoo. Stupid, stupid, Sunwoo.

What had he done? What had he _done_?

“We’re here.”

Giwook’s voice broke into Sunwoo’s empty thoughts. Sunwoo didn’t stop to thank him or ask him for anything else - he just leaped out of the car without a second thought and raced for the apartment building.

He could see the red-and-blue flash of sirens as a cop car pulled up into the parking lot. One of the police men shouted at Sunwoo to stop. He didn’t.

Arrest him. Put him in jail. Euthanize him.

Sunwoo didn’t care what the cops did to him, but if they stopped him before he reached Chanhee, he’d kill them. Nobody was going to keep him from saving the man he loved.

No one was going to get in his way.

Sunwoo slammed into the apartment doors full force. He felt metal dig into his shoulder, but he ignored the pain.

His footsteps were eerily loud as he aimed for the receptionists’ desk. There was a lady sitting there he’d never seen before. She took one look at him and dropped her smile.

He probably looked crazy.

He probably _was_ crazy.

Crazy enough to hurt someone if they didn’t let him through to Chanhee.

Sunwoo skidded to a halt in front of the desk. He was panting, heaving, gagging in his rush to draw in air. He knew his eyes were wild and his hair was a mess and he was sweating like no man’s business.

This receptionist probably wanted nothing to do with him.

“Give me the key to apartment 301,” Sunwoo spat out. His heartbeat was throbbing in his temples as he spoke - he knew it would physically burst if he kept this up much longer. “Now. Give them to me!”

The receptionist backpedaled away from him. Her own black eyes widened and she reached for the phone. She was about to call the cops on him and arrest him for insanity, most likely.

That couldn’t happen.

Angry, terrified, hurting, Sunwoo slammed his palms on the desk and screamed. He screamed for all he was worth. The sound echoed around the lobby; every head within ear shot whipped around to stare at him like he was an idiot.

Yes, he was. He was an idiot. Such a big idiot he’d driven his boyfriend to suicide. Why couldn’t they understand?!

“Dang it!” he shrieked. The back of his throat was burned raw at the inhuman sound. “He’s going to _kill himself_ if I don’t get in there! I am _not_ going to let him die! Give me the keys! NOW!”

Something in his tone of voice, or his eyes, or the desperation in his body language must have gotten through to the receptionist. Though she still looked uneasy, a sliver of trust shone in her eyes, and she quickly opened a drawer and tossed Sunwoo the keys to Chanhee’s apartment.

Yes! He could get in!

It was just a matter of being on time now. If Sunwoo was too late to save Chanhee, he’d never forgive himself.

Never.

Everything flashed by him in a blur the moment he pivoted from the receptionist’s desk and dashed for the stairs. The elevator would be too slow, way too slow when he could get up the stairs more quickly.

Some final shred of his rational brain took note of Cya speaking to the policemen right outside the front doors. They were in heated conversation - one cop was on his phone. Cya must have told them the situation and they believed him.

Why else would they not be coming after Sunwoo? Why else would they be calling an ambulance?

Well, they wouldn’t need one. Sunwoo would make sure Chanhee made it out of this alive. He’d kill himself first before he let Chanhee die.

He was going to save Chanhee no matter what the cost. Even if it was the last thing he did.

It felt like an eternity passed while Sunwoo climbed the stairs. Three flights, thirty steps, dragging on and on and on. He was positive if he wasn’t running on adrenaline he’d be dead by now from the sheer torture he was putting his body through.

He could literally hear himself wheezing.

Once this was over, he’d probably die himself. But that was okay, as long as Chanhee was alive.

“Sunwoo! What’s going on!”

Sunwoo didn’t even remember making it to the third floor. Didn’t remember crashing through the door. Didn’t remember running down the hall. The first thing he saw was Hyunjoon’s terrified face throwing questions at him he couldn’t answer.

There wasn’t time to respond.

“Move,” he commanded, and Hyunjoon did.

Heart pounding, Sunwoo fumbled with the key and put it in the lock. He turned it once, twice. It didn’t budge.

Sunwoo cursed.

Had the dumb receptionist given him the wrong key?

Then he heard a click. The door unlocked. Sunwoo shoved it open with all his might.

He ignored the loud crash that resulted from the door slamming into the wall. Ignored Hyunjoon following him in quiet reassurance.

Ignored everything, except the sound of his feet leading him to the bathroom.

When he stopped, it was in front of an ominously closed bathroom door. Sunwoo tried the handle: locked.

“No!” Sunwoo cursed again. “Chanhee, I know you’re in there! Open the door this instant, or I swear I’ll break it down!”

Nothing. No sounds. Nothing, except for a small whimpered noise squeezing out through the cracks in the door.

Oh, no. Sunwoo was too late, wasn’t he? Chanhee had already cut himself, hadn’t he? Chanhee couldn’t open the door because he was dying.

Sunwoo was too late.

“Chanhee!” he cried out. The pain and devastation could be heard in his voice. There was no mistaking the sob that slipped from his mouth.

Sunwoo slammed his fist into the door with a last, pitiful, cracked sob. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t see. He couldn’t feel anything. He released a choked scream. Then he started crying. “Hyung . . . I-I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Sorry for everything. For being doubtful. For being distrustful. For being unloving. For being wrong.

For just . . . being Sunwoo. Someone that could never love Chanhee enough.

Sunwoo was so sorry. And he needed to tell Chanhee that in person, before he lost him forever.

So, in an act of inhuman strength, with determination and a will that he had never felt before, Sunwoo reared back and smashed his foot into the door. He accompanied it with one loud final scream of resolve that promised the world he’d come for it if it had taken his precious Chanhee - that he’d tear down this earth dirt by single piece of dirt, if it had so much as laid harm to the only perfect boy in the world.

The door splintered under Sunwoo’s foot. It was flung off its hinges into the open space of the bathroom. It landed pinned against the toilet, out of harm’s way . . . directly behind a body that Sunwoo knew like the back of his own hand.

He’d know that pink hair anywhere. He’d know Chanhee if he saw him from space. He’d be able to greet his boyfriend in his own sweet, silly way without second thought. But this time, when he laid eyes on Chanhee’s body, all he could manage by way of greeting was a single, gut-wrenching scream.

“CHANHEE!”


End file.
